Let's try to sing some sense into your typical deep-freeze-denying DUmmie. Click the music link and sing along!
DUMMIE, IT'S COLD OUTSIDETune: "Baby, It's Cold Outside"It's warmer each day
(But, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
It must go away
(But, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
This warming has been
(But lately a huge drop in)
Our greatest vice
(Just feel your hands, they're just like ice)
Oh, what will it take to turn us
(Wait while I check the furnace)
And wake us to the truth we ignore
(Listen to the fireplace roar)
The sunbeams will start to burn us
(See how I crank the furnace)
Well, that is what I heard from Al Gore
(Put some blankets down at the door)
The experts all think--
(I'm seeing a St. Bernard)
Say, what's that ice rink?
(No rink, that's just your back yard)
I wish I knew how
(There's ice on the furnace now)
To break the spell
(Just take a chance, I wouldn't tell)
I ought to say it's no colder
(Don't wanna get a cold shoulder)
At least I'm gonna say "climate change"
(Then you make the facts rearrange)
I really can't say
(DUmmie, don't hold out)
Uh, that it's cold outside
(DUmmie, it's cold outside) . . .
I simply must know
(Yo, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
How we got so much snow
('Cause, DUmmie, it's cold outside)
It's hard to combine
(Eight inches--no, make it nine)
Snow, ice, and warm
(Look out the window at that storm)
"You're sinister and seditious!"
(Gosh, you libs are suspicious)
Would DU even show me the door?
(Make waves and make the tolerant sore)
My lib'ral friends can be vicious
(Ooh, you libs are malicious)
And what would I say to Al Gore?
(Never such a blowhard or bore)
I'm covered with snow
(See, DUmmie, I told you so)
It's 20 below
(With ten more degrees to go)
It's really been cold
(Wind chill, something to behold)
But I cannot--
(How can you claim it's getting hot?)
They're gonna call me a traitor
(But lib'rals can't be haters)
At least they will call me a troll
(If you're caught, then just be a mole)
I really can't say
(Get over that holdout) . . .
Uh, but it's cold outside!
(DUmmie, it's cold outside!)