Summer Hathaway Halfwit: Because she's almost half right.
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.
He asked, "What are all these clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are lie-clocks. Everyone on earth has a lie-clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said the man. "Who's clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating she's never told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"
St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that he told only two lies in his entire life."
"Where's President 0bama's clock?" asked the man.
"0bama's clock is in Jesus' office; He's using it as a ceiling fan."
^^^
not a franksolich original; I found it in a stack of papers near a facsimile machine.