Author Topic: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake  (Read 5247 times)

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Offline bijou

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Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« on: May 29, 2008, 08:15:04 AM »


Quote
A tourist in Australia suffered greatly for going to the toilet at the roadside, when an extremely venomous snake bit him on the penis while he was attending to his business.

The man was caught short on the road in Queensland, resulting in him having to answer the call of nature close to Laura (that's a town in the northern tip of Queensland, not a woman).

But as he was crouching down beside the road, a brown snake – the venom of which is deadly – spotted an opportunity, slid between the man's legs and bit him on the penis.

...
link



Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2008, 08:17:07 AM »

life imitates punchline.

insert puns here.


Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2008, 08:23:59 AM »
Brown snake vs. trouser snake....shit was bound to happen.

Offline bijou

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2008, 08:41:33 AM »

life imitates punchline.

insert puns here.


Fangs for that, you could at least have tried to make a pun.  :(



Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #4 on: May 29, 2008, 08:45:55 AM »

life imitates punchline.

insert puns here.


Fangs for that, you could at least have tried to make a pun.  :(

I honestly thought this thread would be on it's 5th page by now. :-)

I guess most guys had the same initial reaction I did;  wincing, getting a bad case of the *shudders*, and clicking the back
button really, really quickly.


Offline Randy

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #5 on: May 29, 2008, 08:46:35 AM »
This sounds like a cock & (bull)shit story.

Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #6 on: May 29, 2008, 09:28:52 AM »
All I want to know is......did it swell up real big?
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Offline Splashdown

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #7 on: May 29, 2008, 09:31:42 AM »
Awww. Come ON PEOPLE! It's taking this long to wonder if he asked anyone to suck out the poison?  :hammer:
Let nothing trouble you,
Let nothing frighten you. 
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God never changes.
Patience attains all that it strives for.
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God alone suffices.
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Offline Lacarnut

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #8 on: May 29, 2008, 09:32:43 AM »
This sounds like a cock & (bull)shit story.

Did you read the other articles about the drunk getting his penis bitten by a small dog while urinating thru a fence or the other guy's penis being hit by lightning while riding his motorcycle? The picture of the snake is a boa rather than a brown snake which is non venomous. All of these incidents sound like a pile of horse manure.  

This author is a real dickhead. :loser: :mental:

Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #9 on: May 29, 2008, 09:33:30 AM »
Awww. Come ON PEOPLE! It's taking this long to wonder if he asked anyone to suck out the poison?  :hammer:

that was the punchline I was thinking of;  "Brother, you are gonna DIE".   :rotf:

Offline Splashdown

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #10 on: May 29, 2008, 09:35:29 AM »
If he survives, he's going to pee like a lawn sprinkler!    :o
Let nothing trouble you,
Let nothing frighten you. 
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God never changes.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #11 on: May 29, 2008, 10:05:52 AM »
The last paragraph is the winner:
Quote
The spokesman added that the man was 'a bit shocked and embarrassed' by the incident, and that he was 'lucky' to have escaped so lightly. Luck being a relative concept, obviously.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #12 on: May 29, 2008, 11:47:55 AM »


Quote
A tourist in Australia suffered greatly for going to the toilet at the roadside, when an extremely venomous snake bit him on the penis while he was attending to his business.

The man was caught short on the road in Queensland, resulting in him having to answer the call of nature close to Laura (that's a town in the northern tip of Queensland, not a woman).

But as he was crouching down beside the road, a brown snake – the venom of which is deadly – spotted an opportunity, slid between the man's legs and bit him on the penis.

...
link
You're a real whiz with these threads, aint'cha?   :-)
If you want to worship an orange pile of garbage with a reckless disregard for everything, get on down to Arbys & try our loaded curly fries.

Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #13 on: May 29, 2008, 11:49:51 AM »
Chuck Norris woulda used the snake to wipe his ass.

Offline Chris_

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #14 on: May 29, 2008, 11:57:35 AM »
Chuck Norris woulda used the snake to wipe his ass.
dammit, now I need a new keyboard
*wipes off monitor*
 :rotf:
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Offline jtyangel

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #15 on: May 29, 2008, 12:02:10 PM »
Chuck Norris woulda used the snake to wipe his ass.

I'M with Lug, I got tears in my eyes.  :lmao:

Offline Wineslob

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #16 on: May 29, 2008, 01:51:01 PM »
Chuck Norris's penis would have wrestled the snake to the ground and killed it.
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Offline Dixie*Darling

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #17 on: May 29, 2008, 02:45:41 PM »
Damn I needed the laugh! 
Good God y'all are a crazy bunch! 

 :rotf: :thatsright: :lmao:

Offline LC EFA

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Deadly Oz snake bites tourist's todger
« Reply #18 on: May 29, 2008, 07:04:41 PM »
Deadly Oz snake bites tourist's todger

Roadside toilet stop ends in embarrassment and hospital
By Lester Haines → More by this author
Published Thursday 29th May 2008 11:55 GMT

A tourist enjoying Australia's Queensland had a close brush with death when a deadly brown snake attacked his todger as he took a roadside toilet break, the The <a href="http://www.cairns.com.au/article/2008/05/29/4198_local-news.html>Cairns Post[/url] reports.

The unnamed victim was last month around 300km northwest of Cairns when he crouched down to relieve himself, at which point the venomous reptile "slithered between his legs and lunged at his manhood".

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/05/29/brown_snake_attack/
----

 :o :bolt:

Offline Ptarmigan

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #19 on: May 29, 2008, 08:08:01 PM »
Next on OW! MY BALLS!
Hormel gets bitten by snakes!
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Offline Schadenfreude

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #20 on: May 29, 2008, 08:13:57 PM »
Oh ptarmy that was just... weird.  :rotf:

All the rest of you...  :lmao:
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Offline dutch508

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #21 on: May 29, 2008, 08:16:14 PM »
Is that a snake in your trousers or do you li...nope. It's a snake.
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Offline Schadenfreude

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Re: Deadly Oz snake bites tourist's todger
« Reply #22 on: May 29, 2008, 08:16:19 PM »
What?  What's up with the Aussies and the roadside dumps?  :p
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Offline Schadenfreude

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #23 on: May 29, 2008, 08:33:02 PM »
Is that a snake in your trousers or do you li...nope. It's a snake.

or do you ... what?  :lmao:
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.â€

Offline Chris_

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Re: Man bitten on the penis by deadly snake
« Reply #24 on: May 29, 2008, 08:40:46 PM »
Is that a snake in your trousers or do you li...nope. It's a snake.

or do you ... what?  :lmao:
shrank away, did he?

 :lmao:
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