You should try working with a bunch of full blooded rednecks on Saturday.....after an allnighter in a juke-joint drinking beer, eating pickled pigs feet and pickled eggs. The Germans shouldda had such gas in WW1.
Well, yeah, I'm aware of that, because well, I'm a guy number one, and number two, I lived and worked with rowdy people from since I was a teenager.
Me, myself, though, I go elsewhere, where I'm alone, to let loose.
The biggest explosion occurred when I was in the socialist paradises of the workers and peasants, and developed a, uh, intestinal problem that gave me much distress, and it bloated me, expanding my girth.
It was obvious what it was, and this being the socialist paradises, there was no medical care around.
Fortunately, I remembered reading a diary of a physician with the British army in Afghanistan during the 1840s, about when most of the men were laid low with an intestinal parasite. He put them on coarse rice with water.
I did that; I dined on nothing but brown rice for three days.
Some time the night of the third day, I felt the need, and rushed outside, far away from everybody.
I swear, that had to be the longest one I ever let loose--some minutes, without interruption--and by the time I was done, my waist had shrunk back to its normal 33".
It was so long and uninterrupted.
I dunno if I created any odor or not.
After that, I was healthy again, no problems.
