kpete
I've spent the past 2 days trying to convince my 16 y/o she is not a "slut"
SUN MAR 04, 2012 AT 06:30 AM PST
I've spent the past 2 days trying to convince my 16 y/o she is not a "slut"
bybeantown momFollow
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................. We sat down on the couch and she just cried for what seemed like forever. I held her and cried with her and said more things that I just can't remember now!
Way to show her strength there. But at least you didn't have some verbatim conversation with her.
Finally I got her calmed down enough to tell me the story from the beginning. The note was in her locker when she opened it before her first class. She was so upset that she went to her teacher in first period and asked to be excused to go to the bathroom. She said for first and second period she tried not to be too upset- she cried a little bit but was just trying to figure out who would leave such a piece of trash in her locker. By third period, she had shown the note to a couple of her friends and they were so helpful, trying to play detective and at the same time telling her she should just ignore the stupid people! She managed to get through a math quiz and Spanish test and headed off to lunch in a pretty solid frame of mind.
Honestly, this just wouldn't happen unless there are extenuating circumstances we don't know about. Nobody cares. There are enough girls using birth control that it's really no big deal (it wasn't when I was in high school and that was in the late 70's.
Either this girl has been bragging about being on the pill to anyone who will listen or she really does get around. Maybe she's one of those arrogant liberals like her mother who thinks she knows everything and tells everyone else what to think. Maybe she brags about how smart she is or does something else that puts people off. Granted, bullies can be mean and there are some people who, it seems, are bullied all the way through school and that may be the case here. They'd find something to harass her about anyway.
And that's when it really fell apart; apparently, the girls from the day before were the authors of the note. They lined up behind my daughter to get their lunch tray and started in on her. "Birth control whore", "I told my mom you were on the pill and she said you were nothing but a little tramp" "My mom said some guy she listens to on the radio was just talking about girls like you- he even said you were a slut!" "Yeah, my mom said the same thing, said it's about time people spoke up and weren't afraid to tell the truth"! They laughed, they harassed, they said so many things my daughter couldn't begin to remember it all- she walked back to her table without food and told her friends what was going on. She cried through lunch and through the rest of the day. She said she almost went to the office to call me to come get her but she was trying to be strong and not let them win!
This simply doesn't ring true. Mom wouldn't say "some guy she listens to" nor would the daughter. My sons knew who I listened to simply because I'd bring up something he said every now and then. Discussions with my teenagers about current events & sharing opinions is one of the most rewarding things about parenting teens. It also gives you a chance to keep discussing values.
The last class of the day, however, was the final straw- it's her history class and 2 of these little monsters are in the class with her. They start the class off by talking about current events. One of the little witches brought up Rush Limbaugh and the (male) teacher said that he was an American Icon- sometimes he says things that can be construed as insensitive but overall, he was one of the few people left in today's media who was not afraid to speak the truth! The girls began to laugh and the conversation apparently changed. I don't think the teacher had any clue as to what was going on. My daughter said the rest of the class was just a blur- when the bell rang, she ran to her locker and down to the bathroom.
If this is true he's one of the handful of conservative teachers in the country but I highly doubt he'd let this kind of harassment go on in his classroom. Besides, the teacher is exactly right about Rush. However, if this really happened why didn't your daughter tell them to shut the hell up and MYOB?
I asked my daughter how these girls found out about her being on birth control. It had to have come from someone on the trip, but we have no idea who. It doesn't matter, really, I just would like to know. My daughter looked at me so innocent, so very sad and asked me "Am I a slut because I take a prescription birth control pill? I don't take it because I am having sex, I take it to help my periods- am I a bad person, Mom?"
AM I A BAD PERSON? My 16 year old daughter asked me if she was a bad person because she is on the pill! Who are we? What century do we live in? Who in the hell has the right to say these things? Who does Rush Limbaugh think he is? Why is he allowed to say these things and hurt people? Why have I spent the last 2 days trying to convince my 16 year old that she is not a slut?
Well somewhere along the line, IF this is even true, your daughter had to tell someone who somehow managed to let the only 3 or 4 girls in the entire school who would care about her taking birth control pills and are also mean. Also, how is it possible for a 16 year old to be this naive? Seriously, she's 16! I'd expect this kind of thing from a 12 year old but by 16 she should have the maturity to know taking birth control pills for her complexion doesn't make her a "bad person" even if some bullies said she is.
On Monday, I am going to my child's high school and meeting with her counselor and principal. I don't yet know what I am going to say but I know this- nothing is going to take away the pain my daughter felt, the humiliation she felt, the indignation she felt. Nothing will make this all O.K., nothing will take us back to before this all happened. As a parent, you want to protect your child from hurt and pain. I didn't protect my child from this- I can only try to make sure that she suffers no more at the hands of these little witches. Or ignorant assholes like Rush Limbaugh.
the rest:
http://www.dailykos.com/s...s-not-a-slut-?via=siderec
Of course, it could simply be that the girl made out with a hot dog or she has a fat ass:
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6Z16H6c2NY&feature=related[/youtube]