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Offline seahorse513

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Grandparents rights
« on: January 18, 2012, 08:48:15 PM »
I was on facebook the other day, and a co-worker(no less) was complaining that she doesn't see her grandchildren as often as she would like(that not what she said and the get go). Mother and daughter don't have the greatest relationship anymore( I did not know this till this Facebook post).
Obviously, there are alot of games going on between the two of them and the children are caught in the middle. of course this got different opinions and criticism against the daughter. She actually posted that it was between her mother and herself(quite rightly so)
In the end, Coworker wants to get legal "Grandparents Rights".

To me, it would be up to the parents discretion, if they want their parents to be involved in their children's lives. The only time , I think a grandparent could legally interfere, if they felt the child was in danger, neglected or the parents are minors...
It will be interesting how it all pans out...
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Offline Minky

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2012, 09:18:48 PM »
My boss went to court last week and got Grandparents visitation for their three granddaughters. Their daughter is a mess and left the children last year. Dad has refused to let them see the girls even though the grandparents raised them until the oldest was 8 years old. The oldest is 17 now. Any time he sees that any of the girls have contacted the grandparents, he immediately shuts the phones off.

Very strange situation, but he was forced to give them visitation. They got far more than would normally be given though, but I think that's due to the girls having no contact with their mother. Our clients are very good people. It's sad that their daughter is a mess, but it's great that they will now have time with the girls again.

Lots of happy tears at the end of the week last week and they were able to spend the weekend together this past weekend.
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2012, 08:57:57 AM »
Quote from: Minky on January 18, 2012, 09:18:48 PM
My boss went to court last week and got Grandparents visitation for their three granddaughters. Their daughter is a mess and left the children last year. Dad has refused to let them see the girls even though the grandparents raised them until the oldest was 8 years old. The oldest is 17 now. Any time he sees that any of the girls have contacted the grandparents, he immediately shuts the phones off.

Very strange situation, but he was forced to give them visitation. They got far more than would normally be given though, but I think that's due to the girls having no contact with their mother. Our clients are very good people. It's sad that their daughter is a mess, but it's great that they will now have time with the girls again.

Lots of happy tears at the end of the week last week and they were able to spend the weekend together this past weekend.

Sounds like the ex-son-in-law blames the grandparents for his ex-wife turning out so badly.
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Offline Alpha Mare

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #3 on: January 19, 2012, 09:33:07 AM »
The courts usually give grandparents very generous visitation, better than parents usual every-other-weekend/2 weeks-in summer. I was granted full custody. 
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Offline Inga

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #4 on: January 19, 2012, 01:15:03 PM »
In some cases those children wouldn't have a chance in life without their grandparents. There many grandparents in my area raising their grandchildren, because their parents run off or just don't want to be bothered. So if they are decent grandparents, it could be good to give them the rights.What a world!
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Offline IassaFTots

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #5 on: January 19, 2012, 01:18:54 PM »
I can say for sure I would be a much different person now if I wasn't with my Grandparents as much as I was in my youth.  I spent all summer every summer with them from the time I was a baby until I graduated HS.  I sure do miss them.
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Offline seahorse513

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #6 on: January 19, 2012, 06:25:41 PM »
I understand every situation is different. I saw my grandparents once a year for three weeks growing up. I guess I was just mad that this coworker aired it that way
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Offline Maxiest

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #7 on: January 19, 2012, 06:35:29 PM »
In TN the law is very straight forward.  For the grandparents to go get visitation they have to meet certain criteria.

1.  Father or Mother died.
2.  Parents are divorced or separated.
3.  Mother or father have gone missing.
4.  They lived with the grandparents for 12 months or more.
5.  Another one but I can't remember.  :???:
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Offline BEG

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2012, 06:57:43 PM »
I would understand if my mom didn't want me or my brothers to see my grandma (my dad's mom). My grandma (who is still alive at 98) is not the nicest person. She was cruel to my mom when she was married to my dad and would say nasty things about my mom to us kids. I could list some of the crap she pulled but I dont want to get into it.  I'm pretty sure she has a mental illness. BUT my mom never said anything negative about her when we were growing up or my dad after they got a divorce and she let us kids go to my grandparents farm when ever we wanted.  She knew eventually that we would figure her out and we all did. I respect my mom tremendously for the way she handled it.

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Offline vesta111

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Re: Grandparents rights
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2012, 06:53:25 AM »
Quote from: BEG on January 19, 2012, 06:57:43 PM
I would understand if my mom didn't want me or my brothers to see my grandma (my dad's mom). My grandma (who is still alive at 98) is not the nicest person. She was cruel to my mom when she was married to my dad and would say nasty things about my mom to us kids. I could list some of the crap she pulled but I dont want to get into it.  I'm pretty sure she has a mental illness. BUT my mom never said anything negative about her when we were growing up or my dad after they got a divorce and she let us kids go to my grandparents farm when ever we wanted.  She knew eventually that we would figure her out and we all did. I respect my mom tremendously for the way she handled it.



A bag of worms here, a 4-7 year old child is sent for 3-6 weeks with a grandparent that has nothing good to say about their parent.   Then off to another set of grandparents that say nothing good about the other parent.

Loyalty's divided, the kids may protest the grandparents view of either parent and  be brought up short by condescending relatives that ignore the child or disbelieve them.

Children have no choice when a Court ordered them to live for weeks at a time with blood relatives that despise one of their parents.  If the kids overhear grandparents putting down a parent, speak up to say the things they heard are not true,    then the rush to convince the child that this is true and grandparents know best.

Grandparents must unite  for the best for the child, knock off this loyalty issue and never give a child a reason to fear a parent on their return to the home.  Forget about how the child is being raised by a parent or parents, take them in and love them for the time they are there.   NEVER EVER should a child have to listen to s*it about one or the other parent from others especially blood family.

If the child is in bad circumstances then the parent looses custody and a grandparent can step in------However how bad the plight of the child, they need to know their parents love and value them.   Who knows what is down the road in 15 years for the child and their parent.
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