Nebraska primitive has problems sitting on the commode

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=317x4095

Oh my.

One of the rare primitives from south-central Nebraska.

Maru Kitteh  (1000+ posts)        Sat Sep-18-10 02:17 AM
A CORNHUSKER PRIMITIVE
Original message

Anyone under 50 and/OR regularly active had a hip resurfacing or THR?

What did it feel like when your problem first started "for real," and by that I mean you just didn't feel like you could take it anymore, you were taking too many over-the-counter drugs or self medicating, etc.?

Did you feel like your healthcare provider(s) understood how bad it was?

How long did it take you to get to an accurate diagnosis?

How did you get to your accurate diagnosis and treatment?

Let me preface this whole story by telling you that I am a 42 yo female who is overweight but not in the obese category by medical criteria.

Any help would be so greatly appreciated. I feel like I'm doing my level best to be communicative and assertive with the caretakers I've seen, but so far I've come away feeling like they think I'm wrong about the origin of my pain (I f'n know where it f'n hurts, thankyouverymuch) or they just don't understand how bad it is.

I don't want to get too personal, but one of the first things most of us do in the morning, obviously, is pee. Due to the amount of water I drink to help my kidneys with the meds, peeing is usually the first thing I want to do after sleeping as long as the pain and my trazodone will allow. I got a script for traz to combat the insomnia that was mostly caused by the pain in the first place.

I swear to God, that commode looks like it's 7 ft. away when I need to sit down on it in the morning. I'm terrified of the pain on the way down, and I'm terrified I won't be able to get back up. I won't bore everyone further with a pain diary of my daily life because you probably understand already.

Help me. Teach me. Tell me what you think I should know.

Warpy  (1000+ posts)        Sat Sep-18-10 02:09 PM
THE DEFROCKED WARPED PRIMITIVE, #09 TOP PRIMITIVE OF 2009
Response to Original message

1. Get yourself a high hat

It's a plastic gizmo that sits on top of the toilet and raises the height to a much more comfortable position. I've been eyeing them, myself, although I'm not there yet.

Your local pharmacy will probably order one for you if you don't have a medical supply store nearby.

You can also get them online. This one is reasonably priced, http://www.amazon.com/Mabis-Toilet-Seat-Riser/dp/B000BK... There are also more expensive models that come with handles on the side to help you get off it when you're done.

Maru Kitteh  (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-19-10 09:34 PM
A CORNHUSKER PRIMITIVE
Response to Reply #1

2. I've thought about adding one of those temporarily. It would help with at least that one thing. But I'd really rather address and treat the root of the problem, of course. I do not accept the current state of affairs as one that cannot be remedied. I'm way too young to quit hiking up mountains and camping and biking and someday in the not so distant future I plan to do some tearing around with some future grandkids.

Warpy  (1000+ posts)        Mon Sep-20-10 11:43 AM
THE DEFROCKED WARPED PRIMITIVE, #09 TOP PRIMITIVE OF 2009
Response to Reply #2

3. The problem is that joint replacements have a limited lifespan which is why they don't want to do them on younger folks. In the meantime, they expect you to paste yourself together with a patchwork of drugs and assistive equipment like high hats or even a cane until you're of an age where a hip replacement will last the rest of your active life.

You don't have to like it.

My eye surgeon had to fight for two years to get his hip replaced and he's an old bugger, older than I am. They really resist putting them in if that hip is still holding you up.

[PatriotGame]

Maru Kitteh  (1000+ posts)        Sat Sep-18-10 02:17 AM
A CORNHUSKER PRIMITIVE
Original message

Let me preface this whole story by telling you that I am a 42 yo female who is overweight but not in the obese category by medical criteria.

I don't want to get too personal, but one of the first things most of us do in the morning, obviously, is pee. Due to the amount of water I drink to help my kidneys with the meds, peeing is usually the first thing I want to do after sleeping as long as the pain and my trazodone will allow. I got a script for traz to combat the insomnia that was mostly caused by the pain in the first place.

I swear to God, that commode looks like it's 7 ft. away when I need to sit down on it in the morning. I'm terrified of the pain on the way down, and I'm terrified I won't be able to get back up. I won't bore everyone further with a pain diary of my daily life because you probably understand already.

(Forrest Gump says...)

"I gotta pee"...

[true_blood]

How about some pole dancing??!? 

[Boudicca]

(Forrest Gump says...)

"I gotta pee"...

Dear God, that was the worst thing I've seen today. :hammer:Including picking up gooey dog and cat shit and vomit.  DAMN YOU, my eyes are bleeding.

[Ree]

Quit yer bitchin ya cow...When your hip and leg are held together with a rod, plates, screws and nails..Then ya might know what pain is..

[WildRose]

Gee I guess it never dawned on her to take thirty or forty pounds off of her lard ass to give her hips and knees a break!

[LC EFA]

(Forrest Gump says...)

"I gotta pee"...

You get a bitch slap for that - I nearly choked on my drink.

[littlelamb]

That was not a nice image to see so soon after waking up

[BlueStateSaint]

(Forrest Gump says...)

"I gotta pee"...

BS given for that.  I have to puke the chocolate chip muffin I just had.

[Karin]

Bitch slaps to anybody who quoted the post, thereby making it appear over and over and over again. 

[Texacon]

This statement;

Maru Kitteh  (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-19-10 09:34 PM
A CORNHUSKER PRIMITIVE
Response to Reply #1

2. I've thought about adding one of those temporarily. It would help with at least that one thing. But I'd really rather address and treat the root of the problem, of course. I do not accept the current state of affairs as one that cannot be remedied. I'm way too young to quit hiking up mountains and camping and biking and someday in the not so distant future I plan to do some tearing around with some future grandkids.

Does not line up with this statement;

Let me preface this whole story by telling you that I am a 42 yo female who is overweight but not in the obese category by medical criteria.

Somehow I don't think this poster actually DOES any of the physical activity she talks about ....

KC

[Ballygrl]

Gee I guess it never dawned on her to take thirty or forty pounds off of her lard ass to give her hips and knees a break!

Hi WR!

[AllosaursRus]

Bitch slaps to anybody who quoted the post, thereby making it appear over and over and over again. 

NO SHIT!!!!

[franksolich]

This is very odd, very peculiar.

This was first posted two years ago, and drew little attention at the time.

But this past week, with lots and lots of lurkers "searching" for news of one of the members of Skins's island from Bellevue, they all seem to zero in on this thread, even though he's not here.

This had about 350 "views" as of a week ago.

[Karin]

Well good!  Then their eyes bled like ours did from the picture!  If we have to hurt, they have to hurt. 

[Skul]

Bitch slaps to anybody who quoted the post, thereby making it appear over and over and over again. 

 

[Airwolf]

This statement;

Does not line up with this statement;

Somehow I don't think this poster actually DOES any of the physical activity she talks about ....

KC

Yeah that seriously doesn't connect on any level. Your either doing it or your not. If your not exercising then the result of that or one of the results is your going to get fat and your not going to be hiking and jogging and mountain climbing. The way she sounds the grandkids will be running in fear from her to keep from being crushed.

[BattleHymn]

Why do so many primitives have problems using the toilet properly?  

First the gigantic primitive pumps out a shit pile so huge it clogs up his toilet and causes it to spill out over the entire apartment, which left Jeanette to spend her Thanksgiving Day mopping up his offal.  

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,37115.0/

Then there was the primitive that spend so much time evacuating its bowels, they wore the porcelain clean off the commode:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php?topic=76228.0

Also, there was the primitive who experienced toilet Armageddon by having one of the Four Horseman of the Crapocalpyse explode onto Earth via their sewage system:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php?topic=41479.0


Then you have this primitive, who couldn't figure out how to sit on the toilet right.  

[franksolich]

Why do so many primitives have problems using the toilet properly?

Now remember, franksolich is NOT a medical or psychiatric professional, and has never made any pretensions of being such.

However, franksolich has always been a fervent admirer of the work of Sigmund Freud, having read scores of biographies of him, and even some of his works.

My guess is that the late great psychiatrist would say the primitives are anal-retentive.

They know they must shove the stuff out, but damn it, it's theirs, and they want to keep it.

Among notable primitives, I suspect this most-aptly describes Pedro Picasso.

[Skul]

Now remember, franksolich is NOT a medical or psychiatric professional, and has never made any pretensions of being such.

However, franksolich has always been a fervent admirer of the work of Sigmund Freud, having read scores of biographies of him, and even some of his works.

My guess is that the late great psychiatrist would say the primitives are anal-retentive.

They know they must shove the stuff out, but damn it, it's theirs, and they want to keep it.
Among notable primitives, I suspect this most-aptly describes Pedro Picasso.

Well, sir, they do have a penchant for wanting other peoples stuff, also.
Perhaps this is one thing we can give them, and not feel upset about it. 

[BattleHymn]

Now remember, franksolich is NOT a medical or psychiatric professional, and has never made any pretensions of being such.

However, franksolich has always been a fervent admirer of the work of Sigmund Freud, having read scores of biographies of him, and even some of his works.

My guess is that the late great psychiatrist would say the primitives are anal-retentive.

They know they must shove the stuff out, but damn it, it's theirs, and they want to keep it.

Among notable primitives, I suspect this most-aptly describes Pedro Picasso.

I wonder if this might have something to do with many of the primitives using their 'out' hole as an 'in' hole, as well. 

[franksolich]

I wonder if this might have something to do with many of the primitives using their 'out' hole as an 'in' hole, as well.

Actually, sir, your comment before this last one made me laugh.

I dunno if you're aware of how much the primitives whine about their bowels.

They're usually in the health and disability forums, but some are in General Discussion and the Lounge too.

The primitives seem to whine more about their bowels, than their other body parts all put together.

It can get very scatological on Skins's island at times.

[Skul]

What ever you do, do NOT pull the cork out. 

[Texacon]

My guess is that the late great psychiatrist would say the primitives are anal-retentive.

They know they must shove the stuff out, but damn it, it's theirs, and they want to keep it.

Among notable primitives, I suspect this most-aptly describes Pedro Picasso.

 

KC

[franksolich]

Why do so many primitives have problems using the toilet properly?

Ah, but you missed the classic one.

It was a long time ago, and I have no link; it was posted at our old home, meaning before 2008.

It was when the stay-at-home-dad-because-he's-too-lazy-to-work Robb primitive complained that what he unloaded into the commode was too big to pass through the drain or outlet or whatever it is at the bottom of the bowl.

Really.  I kid you not.  

I never see the Robb primitive without remembering that.