When my mother was killed, I couldn't go to the funeral, because I was still in ICU.
My mother's oldest brother's wife...took pictures of the casket - flag draped and flower draped (

).....so that "Debbie would know that her mother was really dead".
She showed them to me when I got out of the hospital about a month later.
I didn't need a picture of a f'n coffin to know that my mother was dead.
Your mother doesn't need a "rubbing of a headstone" or any other damn thing to know her son is dead.
Sorry, BEG....but your brother wanting to do something like that, is just cruel and sadistic.