Long time lurkers disturb me.  
Zip-loc bags confuse me.
Why is cooked bacon wavy?
Did anyone here ever date a guy named Marshall Arts?
Pennies sometimes smell funny.
What can you not do if everyone sees you're getting married?
Cantalope.  It's a melon.  Round earth tones.  Good for foot fungus.
Why DO fools fall in love?
What's the lifespan of a match?  Why do we call a match a match?  What does it match?  I have a book of matches.  Is that a Uno hand?