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Author Topic: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"  (Read 5544 times)

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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #25 on: September 07, 2016, 12:24:46 PM »
Quote from: Skul on September 07, 2016, 10:13:19 AM
 
No lesbos?? What's ùp with that?

They have to be redheads . . . :whistling: :fuelfire: :tongue:
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Offline 67 Rover

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #26 on: September 07, 2016, 01:11:46 PM »
Quote from: 98ZJUSMC on September 07, 2016, 11:12:32 AM


Hey, now.  That's my schtick.

I was thinking more along the line of Columbo. Nothing sillier than a Lt. in homicide confronting known killers for years without backup or a gun, in fact he said he was afraid of them.  :banghead:
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Offline Skul

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #27 on: September 07, 2016, 01:13:41 PM »
Quote from: Big Dog on September 07, 2016, 10:34:31 AM
Shit, you're right.

OK, the preacher's wife is actually a lesbian, and his murder allows her to come out. That makes her the prime suspect at first, until our protagonist points out that oppressed minorities are always innocent.
:rotf:  I'm speechless over that.   :lmao:   :thumbs:  :cheers1: :clap: :cheers2:  :cheersmate:
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Offline 67 Rover

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #28 on: September 07, 2016, 01:20:30 PM »
Quote from: Big Dog on September 07, 2016, 10:34:31 AM
Shit, you're right.

OK, the preacher's wife is actually a lesbian, and his murder allows her to come out. That makes her the prime suspect at first, until our protagonist points out that oppressed minorities are always innocent.


Mmmmm still missing something.

I know!  More Skittles and Swisher sweets.
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Offline USA4ME

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #29 on: September 07, 2016, 01:53:49 PM »
When all is said and done, you've got to wonder about someone who, when deciding a name to use on a social network site, the best they can come up with is "Coolest Ranger".

Coolest Ranger. I'm guessing having an imagination and writing aren't his strongest suits. I also strongly suspect that someone's first crime novel is laying in someone else's File 13 right about now.

.
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Offline SVPete

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #30 on: September 07, 2016, 02:04:51 PM »
Quote from: USA4ME on September 07, 2016, 01:53:49 PM
...
Coolest Ranger. I'm guessing having an imagination and writing aren't his strongest suits. I also strongly suspect that someone's first crime novel is laying in someone else's File 13 right about now.

Well, it is a crime novel.
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Offline FiddyBeowulf

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #31 on: September 07, 2016, 02:30:05 PM »
Quote from: USA4ME on September 07, 2016, 01:53:49 PM
When all is said and done, you've got to wonder about someone who, when deciding a name to use on a social network site, the best they can come up with is "Coolest Ranger".


Someone had already grabbed "TheMastersNemesis".   :(
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #32 on: September 07, 2016, 03:02:23 PM »
Quote from: Skul on September 07, 2016, 01:13:41 PM
:rotf:  I'm speechless over that.   :lmao:   :thumbs:  :cheers1: :clap: :cheers2:  :cheersmate:

Thank you, sir!

 :cheersmate:
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Offline diesel driver

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #33 on: September 07, 2016, 07:19:26 PM »
Quote from: DumbAss Tanker on September 07, 2016, 11:20:10 AM
Well, at least you got the jurisdiction right, but appointments to fill a vacant office are pretty short-term, usually just until the next election cycle, or sometimes until an earlier special election.  And just FWIW, I've dealt with CID, NCIS, and OSI, they are NOTHING like the televised version in any way.

There you go again, DAT.
Poor DUmmie has a brainfart and puts it to paper, and you go and ruin it by injecting REALITY into their safe space.   :lol:
I LOVE IT!!!!
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #34 on: September 12, 2016, 08:27:03 AM »
Quote from: diesel driver on September 07, 2016, 07:19:26 PM
There you go again, DAT.
Poor DUmmie has a brainfart and puts it to paper, and you go and ruin it by injecting REALITY into their safe space.   :lol:
I LOVE IT!!!!

Yeah, I'm kind of an asshole that way.

 :cheersmate:
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Offline Movie buff- The Sequel

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #35 on: September 12, 2016, 08:58:42 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on September 07, 2016, 07:07:38 AM
Since this is a DUmmy we're talking about, I'll flesh out one of your plots.

A White, Republican megachurch pastor is murdered in his church office. The culprit is a local mixed-race tranny who is actually the pastor's illegitimate son. The tranny went to the church for assistance, and the pastor tried to seduce him/her.

The protagonist (who is also a homosexual vegan) identifies the murderer, and in the process uncovers the town's dark secret: the victim had taken advantage of many poor minority women who came to the church for charity, and he had several mixed-race illegitimate children which he never acknowledged.

The protagonist then advocates for the murderer, shames the police chief into dropping charges, and leads a protest against the church. The book ends with the church's board agreeing to close down, sell their assets, and distribute the proceeds to the pastor's bastards as reparations.
Perfect liberal story, I'm surprised it hasn't already been made into a big- budget Hollywood movie.
Don't forget, since someone needs to go to jail, it's revealed that the church's board all knew about what the victim did, and he blackmailed them into silence by the fact that they all had been molesting young boys and beating random gays and blacks to death for the fun of it. Then, after giving away everything the church had, the board members all go to jail for their crimes.
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Proglodyte pretty stoked to have rewritten "In the Heat of the Night"
« Reply #36 on: September 12, 2016, 10:16:33 AM »
Quote from: Movie buff- The Sequel on September 12, 2016, 08:58:42 AM
Perfect liberal story, I'm surprised it hasn't already been made into a big- budget Hollywood movie.
Don't forget, since someone needs to go to jail, it's revealed that the church's board all knew about what the victim did, and he blackmailed them into silence by the fact that they all had been molesting young boys and beating random gays and blacks to death for the fun of it. Then, after giving away everything the church had, the board members all go to jail for their crimes.

 :cheersmate:
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