"Damn it. I've been told by Karl Rove and George Bush to steal this election at all costs. To pull no punches in guaranteeing that no Democrats are allowed to vote in ANY way. Oh, look at this...an absentee ballot for a Democrat...well, what do you know. I'm under strict orders to ensure this vote doesn't get counted. And who's to stop me? No one can see what I'm doing. Know what I'm going to do with this ballot from a Democrat? You want to know what I'm going to do? I'm going to call up the voter and ask about the validity of the signature."
Translation for lurking DUmmies: if there were shenanigans, the ballot would be used for toilet paper. No such call would have been made.