The Conservative Cave

The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: Mr Mannn on March 30, 2012, 06:55:27 PM

Title: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Mr Mannn on March 30, 2012, 06:55:27 PM
Is the night you return from the honeymoon too soon?
"Welcome to real life, darlin! Don't get no better than this!"
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Ballygrl on March 30, 2012, 06:57:11 PM
I had to look that up and ewwwwww!
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Mr Mannn on March 30, 2012, 07:10:08 PM
I thought everyone knew...But your comment made me wanna look it up...
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dutch%20oven
Quote
The act of trapping a person under bed covers after releasing vile ass fumes
Dave vomited on the sheets when his wife gave him a white castle dutch oven.

Quote
Blowing hard ass wind under the covers several times and building up stench while your old lady is brushing her teeth and getting ready for bed, then when she gets into bed, pull the covers over her head and yell "Dutch Oven" and let her enjoy the stench of your ass gas for at least 30 seconds.
Jonas nearly crapped his Underoos preparing a Dutch Oven for his special lady!

A lot of definitions are on the page...
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: NHSparky on March 30, 2012, 07:34:42 PM
As soon as she farts in your presence and doesn't act embarassed, excuse herself, or giggle, game on.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Ogre on March 31, 2012, 06:39:43 AM
Wait, what...you mean you're supposed to wait until the honeymoon is over?  :whistling:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Rebel on March 31, 2012, 02:06:15 PM
Never done it, never will do it.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: rich_t on March 31, 2012, 02:07:22 PM
Never done it, never will do it.

Ditto.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: longview on March 31, 2012, 02:12:05 PM
H5 Rebel and Rich_T. 
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: thundley4 on March 31, 2012, 02:23:37 PM
Never done it, never will do it.


Me neither.  The closest I've done is to pass a silent one and then wait until she moves for it to come out on her side of the bed.  :whistling:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: IassaFTots on March 31, 2012, 10:14:33 PM
It is part of my daily existence....for better or worse.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Minky on March 31, 2012, 11:42:59 PM
I learn so much here. :rofl:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: obumazombie on April 01, 2012, 01:37:31 AM
I learn so much here. :rofl:
Unlearning it is the real trick.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: NHSparky on April 01, 2012, 09:59:21 AM
Okay Reb, rich--what if she does it to you first?  Are you under a never under any circumstances, or simply a no "first-strike" rule?
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: IassaFTots on April 01, 2012, 11:01:02 AM
Okay Reb, rich--what if she does it to you first?  Are you under a never under any circumstances, or simply a no "first-strike" rule?

Speaking from experience?????

Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: docstew on April 01, 2012, 05:38:44 PM
Never done it, never will do it.

Same, because I have to actually sleep in there and she has access to sharp objects...
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: rich_t on April 01, 2012, 06:06:57 PM
Okay Reb, rich--what if she does it to you first?  Are you under a never under any circumstances, or simply a no "first-strike" rule?

Never.  Under any circumstances.

I wouldn't marry a woman so classless as to do it to me.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: IassaFTots on April 01, 2012, 08:54:33 PM
Never.  Under any circumstances.

I wouldn't marry a woman so classless as to do it to me.

Sounds like you are missing out on a lot of fun.  Farts are fun.  Or funny.  Serial! 
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: obumazombie on April 01, 2012, 10:14:19 PM
I heard a doctor say holding farts in is bad for you. Forcing them out is dangerous.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Wineslob on April 02, 2012, 01:49:45 PM
Mine rips one and then "fluffs the sheets".     :mad:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Maxiest on April 02, 2012, 02:01:01 PM
I waited about a month to "Dutch Oven" my fiancee...

She wouldn't do it to me, although she lets them rip in my presence all the time.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 02, 2012, 02:28:11 PM
I did one a few years ago that was so bad that I could see the cloud coming, and there were no lights on at all.  I didn't have to put my wife's head under the covers--it went right through them. :panic: :runaway: 
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 02, 2012, 02:35:31 PM
I had to look that up and ewwwwww!

 :lmao:  I am the oven in my family and hubby says I ruined his favorite thing and that was sleeping with his head under the covers  :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 02, 2012, 02:36:25 PM
I did one a few years ago that was so bad that I could see the cloud coming, and there were no lights on at all.  I didn't have to put my wife's head under the covers--it went right through them. :panic: :runaway: 

I made myself throwup one time, that is the say I got the name "Sewerbutt"   :naughty:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Eupher on April 02, 2012, 02:43:48 PM
Never done it, never will do it.

Yup. She's got more class than that. (I ain't so sure about myself, but that's another issue.)  :rotf:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Karin on April 02, 2012, 02:50:40 PM
As soon as she farts in your presence and doesn't act embarassed, excuse herself, or giggle, game on.

Never have done it, never will do it. 

But this is MAN LAW.  Does a small camping tent count?  Zip, I was out of there and running through the woods, I didn't care what I had on.  That was at the one-year mark. 
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 02, 2012, 03:13:00 PM
Never have done it, never will do it. 

But this is MAN LAW.  Does a small camping tent count?  Zip, I was out of there and running through the woods, I didn't care what I had on.  That was at the one-year mark. 

my brother, a vp of a global company, likes to go into someone's office and let one rip (and his are bad) and he shuts the door. 
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Eupher on April 02, 2012, 03:21:01 PM
my brother, a vp of a global company, likes to go into someone's office and let one rip (and his are bad) and he shuts the door. 

Runs in the family, eh? Oh, better check your shorts for lumps.
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 02, 2012, 03:25:38 PM
Runs in the family, eh? Oh, better check your shorts for lumps.

wearing a skirt today and going commando  :naughty: 
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Eupher on April 02, 2012, 03:29:55 PM
wearing a skirt today and going commando  :naughty: 

http://www.mediaite.com/tv/bethenny-frankel-has-a-wardrobe-malfunction-during-a-push-up-contest-with-anderson-cooper/

How many pushups do you do during your lunch hour?  :hyper:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Wineslob on April 02, 2012, 04:08:35 PM
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Qm5sRQyfg[/youtube]
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Wineslob on April 02, 2012, 04:09:44 PM
wearing a skirt today and going commando  :naughty: 


Oh my. Wanna climb a ladder?
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: obumazombie on April 02, 2012, 04:49:22 PM
I see London, I see France...
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: docstew on April 02, 2012, 04:52:04 PM
I see London, I see France...

Gina ain't wearing no underpants?
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: obumazombie on April 02, 2012, 04:57:29 PM
Gina ain't wearing no underpants?
That sounds about right -Jerry Seinfeld-
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: wasp69 on April 03, 2012, 11:37:12 AM
wearing a skirt today and going commando  :naughty: 

You are sooo full of shit....   :fuelfire:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: obumazombie on April 03, 2012, 11:38:22 AM
You are sooo full of shit....   :fuelfire:
How full of S H I Tea is she ? ? ?
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 07, 2012, 06:48:30 PM
You are sooo full of shit....   :fuelfire:

No I ain't!  I don't like pantylines nor thongs so  :tongue: and  :naughty:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 08, 2012, 03:01:20 PM
No I ain't!  I don't like pantylines nor thongs so  :tongue: and  :naughty:

Sorry I didn't see this earlier!

:picsneeded:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 08, 2012, 03:21:34 PM
Sorry I didn't see this earlier!

:picsneeded:
:panic:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 08, 2012, 06:58:54 PM
:panic:

You bring out the best in me, dear! :-* :tongue:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Revolution on April 08, 2012, 07:48:27 PM
No I ain't!  I don't like pantylines nor thongs so  :tongue: and  :naughty:

Man, if you weren't spoken for... :naughty:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 09, 2012, 06:54:27 AM
Man, if you weren't spoken for... :naughty:

There would be a serious dogfight on the board!
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 09, 2012, 07:31:30 AM
There would be a serious dogfight on the board!

:exactly:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: wasp69 on April 09, 2012, 12:46:38 PM
No I ain't!  I don't like pantylines nor thongs so  :tongue: and  :naughty:

There's the money shot.

 :-)   :fuelfire:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Revolution on April 10, 2012, 05:03:34 PM
There would be a serious dogfight on the board!

 :lmao: Damn straight. Men of CC: Watch yourselves though. I may be skinny, but I'm wirey, and have great reflexes. :fuelfire: :ninja:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 10, 2012, 06:28:17 PM
:lmao: Damn straight. Men of CC: Watch yourselves though. I may be skinny, but I'm wirey, and have great reflexes. :fuelfire: :ninja:

A lot of us are armed . . .  :tongue:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Revolution on April 11, 2012, 02:58:59 AM
Not sure how to respond to that, so...

 :ohnoes:
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Maxiest on April 11, 2012, 08:31:03 AM
(http://www.deviantart.com/download/197475923/i__m_a_ninja_by_ashamanjung-d39kleb.jpg)
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: Gina on April 11, 2012, 08:52:43 AM
(http://www.deviantart.com/download/197475923/i__m_a_ninja_by_ashamanjung-d39kleb.jpg)

awwwww cute little thing
Title: Re: MAN LAW. How soon can you "Dutch Oven" the gal you love?
Post by: obumazombie on April 12, 2012, 01:48:25 PM
Teenage mutant ninja...
Turtles (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPx-zkaKlTA)
Heroes in a half shell...
Michelangelo, Raphael, Leonardo, Donatello.