A Bouncy Poll

[FlippyDoo]

I'm beginning to believe that we will never see a return to great Bouncy Tales. That is a true loss as Bouncy Tales were usually the DUmps greatest fabrication.

It is sad, but what is more sad?

[franksolich]

Actually, this is a damned fine question, and well worth one considering before replying.

What is it, exactly, that compels the primitives to live in a wolkenkuckucksheim, a cloud cuckooland of grotesque unreality, when living in the real world is s-o-o-o-o-o-o much better for one?

[dutch508]

JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!!

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndN_5IrPOhc[/youtube]

[FlippyDoo]

Actually, this is a damned fine question, and well worth one considering before replying.

What is it, exactly, that compels the primitives to live in a wolkenkuckucksheim, a cloud cuckooland of grotesque unreality, when living in the real world is s-o-o-o-o-o-o much better for one?

I'm normally all for making fun of and laughing at the DUmmies as that is their purpose. A hammer's purpose is beat in nails. A DUmmie's purpose is to entertain normal and decent people with their DUmmie stupidity. In the case of this poll, I'm not really trying to make fun of them. I'm actually attempting to understand their lunacy so I may better aid them. I guess I'm just an altruist.

[BattleHymn]

I'm beginning to believe that we will never see a return to great Bouncy Tales. That is a true loss as Bouncy Tales were usually the DUmps greatest fabrication.

It is sad, but what is more sad?

I voted for "all of the above".  It's becoming a lost art.  They really need someone to step up their game, and start belting some out of the park.  Hopefully, it's not too late for the craft to be revived.  I'm hoping a couple of years of the 'pubs in charge of congress will get them back on track.

What is it, exactly, that compels the primitives to live in a wolkenkuckucksheim, a cloud cuckooland of grotesque unreality, when living in the real world is s-o-o-o-o-o-o much better for one?

Because the facts never seem to fit their narrative, so they end up making their own up. 

[I_B_Perky]

I'm beginning to believe that we will never see a return to great Bouncy Tales. That is a true loss as Bouncy Tales were usually the DUmps greatest fabrication.

It is sad, but what is more sad?

My take:

Imitation is seldom as good as the original and BouncyBall was, if anything, original. Dummies come, dummies go and life goes on. Seldom does one see a dummie propel themselves to prominence such as BouncyBall.  DainBramaged comes to mind as one of the most recent.

Unfortunately I think the Dumpster may have had some effect on the bouncy stories. People tend to act different when they know someone is watching them... even when in their native habitat. Dummies are certainly no exception.

 I sometimes wonder if the quality and quantity of the bouncys from the dump would have continued if the dummies did not know they were being watched and analyzed. It possibly could have been the time frame too. Bush and the GOP was in charge so that may have had something to do with it.

The saddest part is not that a group of people, dummies in this case, felt the need to make up some stupid shit to be accepted by a like minded group of people on an internet board. No... I would say the saddest part is that we lose the great entertainment value of a well put together bouncy.  I kind of feel cheated now. 

[BattleHymn]

It possibly could have been the time frame too. Bush and the GOP was in charge so that may have had something to do with it.

Yeah, that's what I'm hinging some of my hopes on with the new congress. 

[DefiantSix]

...That is a true loss as Bouncy Tales were usually the DUmps greatest fabrication.

Bouncies are/were the DUmp's greatest fabrication? Considering that even when the Great BouncyBall DUmbass was concocting them in her prime, they were obvious bullshit that could be spotted as such within the first sentence - two tops - that isn't saying much.

[I_B_Perky]

Yeah, that's what I'm hinging some of my hopes on with the new congress.

Me too also, BH. Nothing better than a good bouncy to brighten one's day!   

[Big Dog]

Bouncies are/were the DUmp's greatest fabrication? Considering that even when the Great BouncyBall DUmbass was concocting them in her prime, they were obvious bullshit that could be spotted as such within the first sentence - two tops - that isn't saying much.

It is a low bar, but today's Dummies consistently go under it.

Psssst- hey, lurking Dummies: High jump, not limbo. Get it right.

[BlueStateSaint]

All of the above--it even has "The Joooos" in it.

[Carl]

The bouncy has taken on many complex meanings now so perhaps is best to categorize them so as to appreciate each in its own element.

They started with the original bouncy ball conversions of repukes to Che worshiping marxists with just a few educational words.
These are the "self aggrandizing" bouncies,the product of an insecure and demented mind that needs approval from less then human mutants.

Eventually these evolved into the "hero" bouncies where instead of converting the evil rethuglican they were metaphorically slain before a cheering crowd,grateful for being protected from the monster.
They quite often happened in grocery store checkout lines and car dealership waiting rooms (in an interesting corollary some were saved without knowing it by hiding a remote for the TV so fux news couldn`t be seen).
These reached their pinnacle in a Philly dentists office,a virtual gate to conservative hell where every day would spawn a conservative blundering in.

A separate strain eventually began to appear,perhaps due to increased CO2 levels causing the mutation,called the "employment" bouncy.
As all business is a product of greed and oppression it became a requirement to but the Scrooge McDuck conservative boss in his place after he demanded that the 8:01-4:59 coffee break the slave deserved be ended.
It proved over and over again that Sooooper genius rsmithnumbers really  should be in charge rather then trying to find reverse in his truck.
Occasionally though these led to another phenomenon called the "walldude" but that can be examined at a late time.

Next up is the "cred" bouncy.
These can be any of the above or often in the case of a poor mole an exaggerated mixture.
Mostly low post count newbs that still are on the outside of the city wall and are desperate to get an audience with the Great and Powerful Skinz.

Finally is the "relevence" bouncy.
This is where the primitive has to insert itself into the outrage of the day or the news release/talking points the DNC emailed.
It seems these are the most common now with the greatest proponent of them being a drunken,fat slob from New Hampshire.

Now with the GOP about to take control of the Congress and no doubt will slash the budget for fighting bouncy viruses they will inevitably morph into more strains.

[franksolich]

This hat's off to you, Carl.

That's a damned fine categorization, classification, of the various sorts of bouncies.

[DumbAss Tanker]

Had to go with the last one, each answer is to some extent true and a factor in the dismal state of DU bouncies, even the ubiquitous JOOOOOS option for once.  I think their doctrinaire hedgehog defense against new members, and attrition of the old, plays a role as well...the old-timers have largely exhausted their creative writing talents and are just serving up reheated leftover stew, and the few newbs that manage to survive the MIRT and Victimhood Patrol pogroms are afraid to offer any extensive and truly original OPs, for good reason.

Also, H5 to Carl for that post!