« previous next »
Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: primitive has punctuation problem  (Read 2264 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline BattleHymn

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8758
  • Reputation: +981/-63
  • Not right, but not left, either.
primitive has punctuation problem
« on: April 18, 2014, 12:06:44 PM »
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018606945

Quote
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 11:58 AM

Star Member a kennedy (8,220 posts)

I'm terribly embarrassed, but I need grammar help on this little poem please.......
It's for my husband's anniversary card....can someone please correct anything wrong in the grammar department....and thank you.

As in the essence of the Opal......

The ups and downs,

The positives and negatives,

The happy’s the sad’s,

The laughs the cries....

All facets of our 34 years.....

Together, I’ll love you forever.

Quote
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 12:01 PM

Star Member arcane1 (22,604 posts)
1. I'd lose the apostrophes in "happy's" and "sad's", but otherwise I like it :)

Quote
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 12:05 PM

Star Member CaliforniaPeggy (108,511 posts)
3. Happy Anniversary!

I think he'll love it!

And I agree about the apostrophes.

Quote
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 12:20 PM

Star Member onehandle (40,407 posts)
5. Poetry and emotion does not have to be subject to grammar.

This isn't a cover letter for a job application.

Rsmithnumbers has that department covered.

Quote
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 01:05 PM

Ino (1,456 posts)
7. Add commas after happys and laughs

and lose the apostrophes in happys and sads

Beautiful poem!


Logged

Offline Dori

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 7964
  • Reputation: +406/-39
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #1 on: April 18, 2014, 12:12:04 PM »
It's so easy to see through the Dummy's real intent.
 
She didn't want help with her grammar, she wanted them to read her poem and go gaga over it.



 

Logged
“How fortunate for governments that the people     they administer don't think”  Adolph Hitler

Offline Bad Dog

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5927
  • Reputation: +314/-313
  • God help me I do love it so
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2014, 12:13:45 PM »
More cowbell.....or, at least a little aching seed.
Logged

Offline Skul

  • Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12475
  • Reputation: +914/-179
  • Chief of the cathouse
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #3 on: April 18, 2014, 12:18:34 PM »
What does an Opal have to do with any of that? :???:
It sounds more like a roller coaster ride through a funhouse.
Logged
Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline BattleHymn

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8758
  • Reputation: +981/-63
  • Not right, but not left, either.
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #4 on: April 18, 2014, 12:19:06 PM »
Quote from: Dori on April 18, 2014, 12:12:04 PM
It's so easy to see through the Dummy's real intent.
 
She didn't want help with her grammar, she wanted them to read her poem and go gaga over it.


B-i-n-g-o.


I'm disappointed to see Calpig showed up, but didn't offer a poem of her own.
Logged

Offline Carl

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 19838
  • Reputation: +1618/-100
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2014, 12:42:15 PM »
Quote from: Skul on April 18, 2014, 12:18:34 PM
What does an Opal have to do with any of that? :???:
It sounds more like a roller coaster ride through a funhouse.

Guessed it is the "stone" equivalent for whatever year anniversary it is but not so from what I could find.

Just another DUmp lunatic.





Logged

Offline Karin

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 17752
  • Reputation: +1895/-81
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2014, 12:56:42 PM »
The opal makes zero sense.  And "positive and negative" do not belong in poetry.  Whew boy, is that a stinker.   

Even losing the apostrophes in the happy's and sad's doesn't improve it, as those are not nouns*.  What a moron this DUmmie is. 


*Except in LOL cat memes, e.g. "I haz a sad."  Not for someone married for 34 years. 

Logged

Offline BlueStateSaint

  • Here I come to save the day, because I'm a
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 32553
  • Reputation: +1560/-191
  • RIP FDNY Lt. Rich Nappi d. 4/16/12
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2014, 03:03:09 PM »
Quote from: Bad Dog on April 18, 2014, 12:13:45 PM
More cowbell.....or, at least a little aching seed.

Blink, blink, blink, blink . . .
Logged
"Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the tempestuous sea of Liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"All you have to do is look straight and see the road, and when you see it, don't sit looking at it - walk!" -Ayn Rand
 
"Those that trust God with their safety must yet use proper means for their safety, otherwise they tempt Him, and do not trust Him.  God will provide, but so must we also." - Matthew Henry, Commentary on 2 Chronicles 32, from Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible

"These anti-gun fools are more dangerous to liberty than street criminals or foreign spies."--Theodore Haas, Dachau Survivor

Chase her.
Chase her even when she's yours.
That's the only way you'll be assured to never lose her.

Offline GOP Congress

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2334
  • Reputation: +274/-113
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #8 on: April 18, 2014, 04:13:51 PM »
Fixed it

As in the essence of the Opal......
(more likely the fragrance of the Bong......)

The ups and downs,
(I mean uppers and downers)

The positives and negatives,
(The relatives and the sedatives)

The happy’s the sad’s,
(and other adjective plurizations)

The laughs the cries....
(The snivels the whines)

All facets of our 34 years.....
(All the face sags of three wasted decades)

Together, I’ll love you forever.
(Otherwise my life will be for naught....OH WAIT....)
Logged
"The main purpose of the Democrat Party and the Left is to destroy the United States, transform Western Civilization to a tribal-based dystopia, and to ultimately kill all conservatives and non progressives." - Jonah Kyle

Offline FlippyDoo

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2474
  • Reputation: +1261/-14
  • Your president, too.
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2014, 04:48:52 PM »
The word “Opal” has the “O” capitalized. When that is taken into consideration along with the propensity the DUmmies have for misspelling words there is a chance that the DUmmie is actually referring to an Opel automobile.

If so the poem could be paraphrased thusly…

Our marriage is like an old car: rusty and in constant need of repair.
Logged
Fictional spirit-guiding by appointment.
conservativecave.com & conservativeunderground.com

For new members and lurkers: I am a fictional spirit-guide with no smell whatsoever. I am part irish setter and part pigeon. If you don't smell any strange smells it means I'm probably standing next to you. As I am a fictional character anything I post should possibly be considered fictional.

Offline Alpha Mare

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2009
  • Reputation: +73/-5
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #10 on: April 18, 2014, 06:58:39 PM »
Opals don't have facets.
Logged
"Political correctness is tyranny with manners."
    - Charlton Heston

Offline Dori

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 7964
  • Reputation: +406/-39
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #11 on: April 18, 2014, 07:04:33 PM »
Quote from: Alpha Mare on April 18, 2014, 06:58:39 PM
Opals don't have facets.

I wondered about that.  Don't think I've ever seen one with facets.

Logged
“How fortunate for governments that the people     they administer don't think”  Adolph Hitler

Offline Big Dog

  • ^^Smokes cigars and knows things.
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15581
  • Reputation: +1954/-213
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #12 on: April 20, 2014, 03:19:38 PM »
That "poem" should be sufficient grounds for a divorce.

 :loser: :loser: :loser:
Logged
Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline 98ZJUSMC

  • The Most Deplorable
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8424
  • Reputation: +436/-76
  • Now, with 99% less yellow!
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #13 on: April 20, 2014, 03:35:29 PM »
Quote from: Dori on April 18, 2014, 12:12:04 PM
It's so easy to see through the Dummy's real intent.
 
She didn't want help with her grammar, she wanted them to read her poem and go gaga over it.


I think you're exactly right.

 :cheersmate:
Logged
              

Liberal thinking is a two-legged stool and magical thinking is one of the legs, the other is a combination of self-loating and misanthropy.  To understand it, you would have to be able to sit on that stool while juggling two elephants, an anvil and a fragmentation grenade, sans pin.

"Accuse others of what you do." - Karl Marx

Offline GOBUCKS

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 24186
  • Reputation: +1812/-339
  • All in all, not bad, not bad at all
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #14 on: May 18, 2014, 12:33:59 PM »
Didn't see this before the crash. It's great!

DUmmy a kennedy could be competition for the CalPig as the DUmp's poet laureate.

In fact, she has an advantage.

I see the CalPig's tone-deaf vulgar rambling combined with a hilarious semi-literacy.

It's as if rsmithnumbers tried to emulate Robert Frost.

Logged

Offline Ralph Wiggum

  • It's unpossible that I'm a
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 19494
  • Reputation: +2554/-49
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #15 on: May 18, 2014, 12:53:48 PM »
I'm thinking this DUmmy has bigger problems than punctuation.
Logged
Voted hottest "chick" at CU - My hotness transcends gender

Offline Chris_

  • Little Lebowski Urban Achiever
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 46845
  • Reputation: +2028/-266
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #16 on: May 18, 2014, 01:59:02 PM »
Nobody has mentioned the excess periods in the ellipses.
Logged
If you want to worship an orange pile of garbage with a reckless disregard for everything, get on down to Arbys & try our loaded curly fries.

Offline Big Dog

  • ^^Smokes cigars and knows things.
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15581
  • Reputation: +1954/-213
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #17 on: May 18, 2014, 08:05:59 PM »
Quote from: Chris_ on May 18, 2014, 01:59:02 PM
Nobody has mentioned the excess periods in the ellipses.

I figured they were an artistic choice, emphasizing the vagueness of the DUmmy's ideas. They seemed to fit with the facets of an opal being up and down.
Logged
Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline I_B_Perky

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 7532
  • Reputation: +721/-329
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #18 on: May 18, 2014, 09:51:57 PM »
Quote
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 11:58 AM

Star Member a kennedy (8,220 posts)

I'm terribly embarrassed, but I need grammar help on this little poem please.......
It's for my husband's anniversary card....can someone please correct anything wrong in the grammar department....and thank you.

As in the essence of the Opal......

The ups and downs,

The positives and negatives,

The happy’s the sad’s,

The laughs the cries....

All facets of our 34 years.....

Together, I’ll love you forever.

Let me fix this abortion for you, dummie:

============================================================================
I am an idiot.

A real idiot.

I have no function in life.

Except to suck the welfare tit.

Taking money from people that earn it.

So I can make stupid poems.

That make no sense.

Except in my drug addled mind.

And think I am a genius.

I am a loser.

I post at DU with other losers.

I am laughed at by normal people.

I am a complete idiot.

34 years and this is all I have to show for my life.

My husband waits to die.

He waits for the...

Blink, Blink, Blink of flashing lights.

His last words to paramedic:

Goodbye cruel world. I married a dummie.

===============================================================================

That would be closer to the truth than what you wrote, dummie.
Logged
Living in the Dummies minds rent free since 2009!

Montani Semper Liberi

Offline BlueStateSaint

  • Here I come to save the day, because I'm a
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 32553
  • Reputation: +1560/-191
  • RIP FDNY Lt. Rich Nappi d. 4/16/12
Re: primitive has punctuation problem
« Reply #19 on: May 19, 2014, 05:06:21 AM »
Quote from: I_B_Perky on May 18, 2014, 09:51:57 PM
Let me fix this abortion for you, dummie:

============================================================================
I am an idiot.

A real idiot.

I have no function in life.

Except to suck the welfare tit.

Taking money from people that earn it.

So I can make stupid poems.

That make no sense.

Except in my drug addled mind.

And think I am a genius.

I am a loser.

I post at DU with other losers.

I am laughed at by normal people.

I am a complete idiot.

34 years and this is all I have to show for my life.

My husband waits to die.

He waits for the...

Blink, Blink, Blink of flashing lights.

His last words to paramedic:

Goodbye cruel world. I married a dummie.

===============================================================================

That would be closer to the truth than what you wrote, dummie.

:clap: :clap: :clap:

And the H5 to boot.
Logged
"Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the tempestuous sea of Liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"All you have to do is look straight and see the road, and when you see it, don't sit looking at it - walk!" -Ayn Rand
 
"Those that trust God with their safety must yet use proper means for their safety, otherwise they tempt Him, and do not trust Him.  God will provide, but so must we also." - Matthew Henry, Commentary on 2 Chronicles 32, from Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible

"These anti-gun fools are more dangerous to liberty than street criminals or foreign spies."--Theodore Haas, Dachau Survivor

Chase her.
Chase her even when she's yours.
That's the only way you'll be assured to never lose her.
Pages: [1]   Go Up
« previous next »