dawg (6,239 posts)
Sorry to be a downer, but damn, I am a broken man!
It all started around four years ago when I found out my wife was cheating. She had been my dream, my best friend, and the sexiest woman I could even imagine.
I was devastated, but not entirely surprised.
She had been leading up to this for several years. Excessive flirtations, dodgy internet activity, "phone" buddies - that sort of thing. We even went to couples therapy over it. (I want my money back )
So the actual real-world cheating was a deal-breaker for me. I moved out. I threatened divorce, but I never really followed through on the legal paper work. There was always an excuse to put it off a few months.
Reconciling with her is not an option and never really was. She'd just do it again. Nothing in her has changed.
I guess a part of me was hoping that she would realize what she had "lost" one day and start at least trying to make amends. But no. I don't think she feels like she has "lost" anything.
And why not? What is so unattractive and/or unsexy about me as to render my love "disposable"? Well, I know that I'm a depressed, whining little shell of a man now, but I wasn't that way when she started all of this.
Well sorry for the pathetic rant. I hope no one replies and it sinks like a stone. I just don't seem to have the ability to get past this thing that has happened in my life. I want to find love again, but I'm shy and I don't have a large social network and I'm afraid there is something profoundly undesirable and unlovable about me that I'm just too dumb to see anyway.
Sigh.
Been there, done that, got the T-shirt dummie.
Now dummie... let me ask a few things.
1. Do you have a job?
2. Do you bathe regularly?
3. Do you act like a man?
If the answer is yes to all three questions, then you just got burned dummie. Yes it happens. It has happened to me.
Now you said she feels like she hasn't lost anything. Your words. Hmmmm.... food for thought. Perhaps you spent too much time on DU? Perhaps you didn't pay enough attention to her? The only person that knows the answer to that is her... and perhaps you.
The best thing you can do is cut your loss and move on. Perhaps you are wiser now, perhaps not. Do not spend your days pining for a woman that obviously has lost interest in you. Move on. Find another female dummie to take up with and take care of her. They are plentiful. Might I suggest Lady Freedom Returns or UnderGround Panther?
5 cents please.
