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Author Topic: The CalPig Under The Knife  (Read 3453 times)

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Offline GOBUCKS

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The CalPig Under The Knife
« on: January 07, 2014, 11:13:19 AM »
The CalPig under the knife!

Maybe while they're at it they can remove the obstruction that prevents her mouth from closing.
Quote
Tue Jan 7, 2014, 10:37 AM
Star Member nolabear (17,402 posts)

Big Vibes for California Peggy's Shoulder Surgery Today.

Be strong, girl! 
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024292845

"Shoulder surgery" my ass. It's a boob job.

Trying to attract more aching seed.
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Offline USA4ME

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #1 on: January 07, 2014, 11:59:04 AM »
Maybe they'll get the Adam's Apple this time.

.
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Offline franksolich

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #2 on: January 07, 2014, 12:03:15 PM »
Maybe as she goes under the anesthesia, it'll occur to her the role she played in the worthless freeloading bum, the Wiley50 primitive's, premature death, from exposure on the beach near where she lives.

He'd asked her for a place to stay--in her house, he could've used a bedroom and never even been noticed--and she walked away from him.
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Offline BannedFromDU

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2014, 12:06:47 PM »
Quote from: GOBUCKS on January 07, 2014, 11:13:19 AM
The CalPig under the knife!

Maybe while they're at it they can remove the obstruction that prevents her mouth from closing.http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024292845

"Shoulder surgery" my ass. It's a boob job.

Trying to attract more aching seed.


      Maybe she has a torn labrum from trying to jerk her husband's schween into position. She's at least a double-bagger, so I reckon it takes a truckload of Viagra, a few Samantha Strong DVDs, and some top-shelf butter churning just to coax some of that aching seed from his sack.
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Offline Karin

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #4 on: January 07, 2014, 12:18:44 PM »
 :rotf:  Oh my God, you are so bad. 
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Offline lastparker

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #5 on: January 07, 2014, 12:22:11 PM »
Quote from: USA4ME on January 07, 2014, 11:59:04 AM
Maybe they'll get the Adam's Apple this time.

.

 :rofl:
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Offline Mike220

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #6 on: January 07, 2014, 12:23:27 PM »
May her surgeon be a drunk with Parkinsons...
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Offline Bad Dog

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #7 on: January 07, 2014, 12:27:58 PM »
Quote from: Karin on January 07, 2014, 12:18:44 PM
:rotf:  Oh my God, you are so bad. 

His strength is the strength of ten because his mind is in the gutter.
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #8 on: January 07, 2014, 12:30:22 PM »
Don't give Samantha Strong a bad name.    :mad:
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Offline BannedFromDU

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #9 on: January 07, 2014, 12:47:03 PM »
Quote from: Wineslob on January 07, 2014, 12:30:22 PM
Don't give Samantha Strong a bad name.    :mad:

     No, just think of it...CalPig's husband with the Van Dyke beard keeps an old VHS player in the guest room and a cache of grainy old Savannah and Madison scenes, copied onto cheap Walgreen's tapes on SLP mode
to fit in six full hours of big-haired, purple-skinned skanks, behind the Christmas decorations in the garage. When CalPig goes out to warble her paeans to the majesty of his wang, he dashes downstairs and yanks out a tape,
ANY tape, and scrams back in. He cues up one of his favorite scenes and imagines his wife Peg has hair and no Adam's Apple, and from there he takes a long stroll down Main Street in Faptown, USA.

     "Why is the carpet stiff in this one little place?" Peg wonders when she cleans the guest room. He must have had a treat in here that dripped, she imagines. A treat indeed.

    Trust me, Samantha Strong and the coterie of late 80's and early 90's porn starlets have helped many a middle-aged man cope with the onus of an ugly wife in the 2010s.
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Offline Skul

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #10 on: January 07, 2014, 01:12:04 PM »
Quote from: USA4ME on January 07, 2014, 11:59:04 AM
Maybe they'll get the Adam's Apple this time..
First thing that came to my mind.  :-)
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Offline BadCat

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #11 on: January 07, 2014, 02:09:10 PM »
Quote from: Skul on January 07, 2014, 01:12:04 PM
First thing that came to my mind.  :-)

I think they are re-attaching its penis.
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Offline Purple Sage

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #12 on: January 07, 2014, 02:14:15 PM »
Hope her hospital isn't infested with bugs.
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #13 on: January 07, 2014, 02:20:54 PM »
Too bad it isn't an obsidian one, wielded by a devoutly religious doctor who only speaks Nahuatl.
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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #14 on: January 07, 2014, 03:32:19 PM »
Things are going well, I hear....









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Offline Wineslob

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #15 on: January 07, 2014, 04:06:40 PM »
You guys are BRUTAL.................... :lmao:



« Last Edit: January 07, 2014, 04:19:12 PM by Wineslob »
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“The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.”

        -- Marcus Tullius Cicero, 55 BC (106-43 BC)

The unobtainable is unknown at Zombo.com



"Practice random violence and senseless acts of brutality"

If you want a gender neutral bathroom, go pee in the forest.

Offline Ralph Wiggum

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #16 on: January 07, 2014, 04:30:27 PM »
Update

Quote
Lionel Mandrake (3,184 posts)

CaliforniaPeggy is doing fine.


The surgeon said everything went well. She had a nerve block and is feeling no pain. She's waiting in the recovery area for a hospital room to become available. Meanwhile, all she wants to do is sleep.
 

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and words.
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #17 on: January 07, 2014, 04:42:42 PM »
Quote
Lionel Mandrake (3,184 posts)

CaliforniaPeggy is doing fine.

It's Mr. CalPig himself!!

Owner and operator of the aching seed!

The inspiration for blink, blink, blink, blink!!

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Offline CollectivismMustDie

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #18 on: January 07, 2014, 04:51:30 PM »
That poor poor...knife.

CMD
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Offline liana

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #19 on: January 07, 2014, 10:58:23 PM »
Good luck to CalPig. I hope her sex change operation goes better than the last.

 :cheersmate:
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Offline Chris_

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #20 on: January 07, 2014, 11:06:25 PM »
Quote from: liana on January 07, 2014, 10:58:23 PM
Good luck to CalPig. I hope her sex change operation goes better than the last.
They're just trimming up some loose ends.
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Offline liana

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #21 on: January 07, 2014, 11:16:18 PM »
Quote from: Chris_ on January 07, 2014, 11:06:25 PM
They're just trimming up some loose ends.

 CalPig was not a handsome man to begin with ( I do not know him, I am just taking a guess). Plastic surgeons are good, but they can not perform miracles  :-)
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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #22 on: January 08, 2014, 04:27:14 AM »
Quote from: CollectivismMustDie on January 07, 2014, 04:51:30 PM
That poor poor...knife.

CMD

Think of the eyes of the OR staff! :runaway: :o :hammer:
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Offline CollectivismMustDie

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #23 on: January 08, 2014, 04:39:45 AM »
Quote from: BlueStateSaint on January 08, 2014, 04:27:14 AM
Think of the eyes of the OR staff! :runaway: :o :hammer:

Indeed. I hope they sterilize the knife (if it could talk it would thank them) before using it to stab their own eyes out.

CMD
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Offline Tess Anderson

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Re: The CalPig Under The Knife
« Reply #24 on: January 08, 2014, 08:44:28 PM »
 :rotf:

Peg herself has posted a post-op update:

Quote

Wed Jan 8, 2014, 06:40 PM

 CaliforniaPeggy (107,430 posts)



Hey, everybody...


 I seem to have survived!

And except for some unfortunate post-anesthesia nausea/vomiting, I am doing well...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018550539
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