A dedication to the klams and the les-cosa-nostra on DU

[CollectivismMustDie]

From a CD a friend sent me of his hometown radio station KQRS in the twin cities, the home of Jugs, comes this little diddy. Dedicated to the Klams and the les-cosa-nostra on DU, because many of you will be looking for something not DU to do, and because I know you'll just love it, so never accuse me of not caring. From the CD entitled "Whatever", here is "Must be lesbian":



In birkenstocks she walks the street,

Wants ellen degeneres for a treat,

Theres her date whos name is Dawn,

Whos not afraid to buy tampons,


Sees a skirt, starts to flirt, flannel shirt, pie for desert
 


Must be lesbian,

Must be lesbian,

Shes a woman in her own <meow>



Speaks her mind and opens her mouth,

And likes to travel way down south,

She preffers a gift thats floral,

Likes her presentations oral,

Not a fan of Dick or John,

Always leaves the furnace on,

Guys ain't sure what makes 'em tick,

But know this much they're tough to lick,



Tit for tat, Chase the cat, Barbie not Ken, Estrogen, Women gay, Wanna lay, Come and join the PGA, Poppin a jock, Girlie talk, Legs unlock, lesbos rock...



Must be lesbian,

Must be lesbian,

Yes she can shes lesbian,

Must be lesbian,

Trust me lesbian,

Cause she can shes lesbian.

 

CMD

[franksolich]

You know, it occurs to me that, for obvious reasons, women who don't like men wouldn't like Nebraska, given our two most-prominent landmarks, which might remind them of something:

^^^the state capitol, at the eastern end of the state



^^^Chimney Rock, at the western end of the state

[DUmpsterDiver]

^^^Chimney Rock, at the western end of the state[/center]

Actually, that resembles something colder than a witches teat that WOULD excite the lesbians.

Eferrari?

[franksolich]

Eferrari?

After poor stupid Beth played some stupid tricks on me during Scamdy, I appropriated the name--and "sfexpat2000"--so that she couldn't use them.

Poor stupid Beth gets some rather, uh, interesting e-mails and somesuch, but being a nice guy, I don't misuse any mistakes in identity.

[franksolich]

Actually, that resembles something colder than a witches teat that WOULD excite the lesbians.

This is located only a couple of miles away from where I spent my infancy, although I wouldn't remember it from then, only from subsequent trips taken as I was growing up.

It was the furthest point to which a friend of mine and I, when in high school, "cruised."  Other kids repeatedly cruised up and down Main Street all evening long, putting circa 100 miles on the car, but we didn't cruise town; we cruised the Sandhills.  Other kids were home by 10 p.m. Friday nights; as this was a 600-mile round trip from town in the center of the Sandhills to Chimney Rock, we got home circa 10 a.m. Saturday mornings.

We always caught Hell, but we did it every other week, for five years, cruising the Sandhills in the middle of the night.  But as it was our only juvenile delinquency, our parents resigned themselves to it.

It's made of soft stone, and has eroded considerably since when the first explorers saw it.  And then sometime during the 1990s, lightning struck it, knocking off substantial footage of its top.

[CollectivismMustDie]

cruising the Sandhills in the middle of the night

Night time in Nebraska has a whole lot to offer, to those who are patient enough to look, and observant enough to see.

CMD

[Chris_]

Night time in Nebraska has a whole lot to offer, to those who are patient enough to look, and observant enough to see.

CMD

It it's anything like southern Alabama, I'll pass.

[CollectivismMustDie]

It it's anything like southern Alabama, I'll pass.

I like to go out driving at night to see deer, snakes, badgers, porcupines, racoons, etc. The bucks I've seen here, are easily among some of the biggest I've ever seen anywhere, though the rattlesnakes are not terribly impressive in size. About 4 feet is the largest I've encountered, and thats on the large side for a prairie rattler.

I've only been through Alabama once during the day, so I wouldn't know exactly what to expect there at night.

CMD

[Chris_]

I stuck to I-40 on my way to Texas the other year and passed through Little Rock with my MGB.  It was honestly the most boring drive I've ever had.  You'd think driving a convertible would make it more interesting, with sites to see and stars to gaze.  No luck.

[CollectivismMustDie]

I stuck to I-40 on my way to Texas the other year and passed through Little Rock with my MGB.  It was honestly the most boring drive I've ever had.  You'd think driving a convertible would make it more interesting, with sites to see and stars to gaze.  No luck.

Here, other than deer and racoons, you pretty much have to get off the beaten path to get where the action is. Of course, we're in drought here, so there aren't many mosquitos to speak of, which makes being out in the summer heat more tolerable. Lots of dead deer and 'coons along most blacktop roads out here, but get off of those blacktop roads though, and you see all kinds of stuff. One night coming home from Kansas, we stopped and watched a badger digging a burrow along a dirt road. At first he was like "WTF" when the headlight shined on him, after a couple minutes, he went back to digging with only an occasional glance at us over his shoulder. Its amazing how much dirt those critters can move, and how fast they can move it.

I suspect that off the beaten path would be the ticket in Alabama as well, but like I say, one pass through in the daytime is the total of my experience there.

CMD

[franksolich]

It it's anything like southern Alabama, I'll pass.

I'm assuming, never having been there, that southern Alabama is full of people and towns.

Here, I'm describing night-time in the Sandhills.  Even in the day-time, in the Sandhills, there's hardly any people, any towns.  There was one 24/7/365 gasoline station-restaurant 75 miles southeast of where I grew up, then one in my town, and then the next one.....225 miles west.

Between my town and the one 225 miles west, there existed not a town of more than 100-200 people, and those were spaced 25-40 miles apart.

In the middle of the night in the Sandhills, it was easy to grasp the vast span and breadth of the universe, and how tiny one really is, in it All.

As dutch508 and longview can confirm, ^^^this is the sky over the Sandhills in good weather.



As dutch508 and longview can confirm, ^^^this is the sky over the Sandhills in bad weather.

The spiritual and religious evolution of both this friend and I happened to coincide--we were at that impressionable age--in that we ended up grasping the Glory, the Power, the Majesty, of God, and the humbling insignificance of man, either as an individual or collectively. 

The last thing this friend wrote before he died last spring (gangrene that got out of control) was that God and nature could destroy man long long long before man could have the least effect upon God and nature--in response to some stupid "man-made climate change" being pushed by Democrats, liberals, and primitives.

He'd ended up being an engineer, and was always of the logical rational scientific mind (as compared with my own "I-don't-careism")--this was no "woo" on his part.

We'd started doing this "cruising" at the age of 14, shortly after we got our learner's permits to drive (with such a permit, one was supposed to have a licensed driver with one, but hey, this was the Sandhills.....), and did it until we were 19, and in college.  Every time, it was an awesome experience, touching Infinity.

[Big Dog]

My old stomping grounds are just west of there.

[franksolich]

My old stomping grounds are just west of there.

Yeah.

Scott's Bluff, or Scottsbluff.

That was about an hour further west--two hours, round-trip--and as it was congested with people, we never went that far.  Just to Bridgeport and Chimney Rock, getting there in the middle of the night, admiring the stone tower against the blackness, talking a bit about confidential matters, and then turning to go back home.

Depending upon the time of the season, and where we were at as the sun rose, the rising sun could be a killer, driving into that blast of light.

And there were snowstorms, rainstorms, hurricane-sized winds, occasionally.

On a 300-mile one-way trip, although it's been a very long time ago now, I guess we probably saw, usually, maybe only five or six other moving motor vehicles all night long, ten or twelve on the whole trip.  Once in a while a train running along the adjacent Burlington Northern tracks.

He heard noises in the night; coyotes, birds, mooing cattle, restless horses, the rustling of snakes underfoot, the howling of the wind, but I only ever saw.

It's probably different now, but this was in the days of tightly-regulated radio, and at night, the only place we could ever get audibly was the rock-and-roll station KOMA, w-a-a-a-a-y down in Oklahoma City, which he played to entertain himself those times I didn't feel like talking and "listening."

It was awesome, the Sandhills at night, and we the only people in the whole universe (seemingly so).