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Author Topic: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy  (Read 3973 times)

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Offline Dori

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Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« on: January 02, 2014, 09:53:06 PM »
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018545977

Quote
WilliamPitt (56,010 posts)


Ever been afraid of a child's toy? I am.

Yeah, so one of Lola's stuffed animals is this dog that's about the size of her. It has big floppy ears, a tail, and a red heart-shaped light in the center of its chest. If you push its ears, paws, belly or nose, it talks and/or sings a song.

...and it is freaking me the **** out. Why? Because it randomly burbles out statements like, "Hug me!" or "I love you!" maybe 20 minutes after anyone has touched it. I had it sitting in the reading chair in Lola's nursery the other day, it had been there for hours with no one touching it, but when I walked in there to grab a bib, the goddam heart light lit up and it asked for a hug. I didn't come within three feet of it.

I saw Poltergeist. **** this thing. If Lola didn't love it so much, I'd give it an exorcism and incinerate it on the ****ing grill.

 



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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #1 on: January 02, 2014, 10:00:30 PM »
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Government is the negation of liberty.
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Offline Charles Henrickson

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2014, 11:14:00 PM »
Meet William Rivers Pitt. International best-selling author. Influential thinker and leader in a vast political movement. Dutiful son, devoted husband, doting father. Little does he know it, but William Pitt is about to enter a strange new world, another dimension in time and space. That's the signpost up ahead. His next stop . . . the Twilight Zone.
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Offline CollectivismMustDie

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #3 on: January 02, 2014, 11:15:29 PM »
Its a safe bet he wouldn't be afraid of these:




CMD

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Offline Skul

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #4 on: January 02, 2014, 11:22:01 PM »
Willbur is wearing his? femimann clothes. How cute.
The KKKlams have got him? on the ropes.  :lmao:

Pathetic piece of wimp.
No offence to wimps, of course.

I dearly pity the poor child that he (maybe) brought forth on this world.
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #5 on: January 02, 2014, 11:30:49 PM »
Quote from: CollectivismMustDie on January 02, 2014, 11:15:29 PM
Its a safe bet he wouldn't be afraid of these:




CMD

Hell, he uses those to keep 'Lil Bit O' Pitt quiet while the little woman is out chopping wood and churning butter, and Mama Raven is digging up frozen potatoes for their gruel.



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Offline CollectivismMustDie

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #6 on: January 03, 2014, 12:17:22 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on January 02, 2014, 11:30:49 PM
Hell, he uses those to keep 'Lil Bit O' Pitt quiet while the little woman is out chopping wood and churning butter, and Mama Raven is digging up frozen potatoes for their gruel.





:rotf:

I suspect I may regret hearing the answer  :o , but just have to know:

How does one get so bowlegged from digging up frozen potatoes?

CMD

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Offline Skul

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #7 on: January 03, 2014, 12:20:48 AM »
Quote from: CollectivismMustDie on January 03, 2014, 12:17:22 AM
:rotf:

I suspect I may regret hearing the answer  :o , but just have to know:

How does one get so bowlegged from digging up frozen potatoes?

CMD
Decades of hard work.
That could be your great grandmother.
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #8 on: January 03, 2014, 12:21:39 AM »
Quote from: CollectivismMustDie on January 03, 2014, 12:17:22 AM
:rotf:

I suspect I may regret hearing the answer  :o , but just have to know:

How does one get so bowlegged from digging up frozen potatoes?

CMD

Mama Raven there didn't get bowlegged from digging up potatoes... she got those bow legs the old fashioned way.

Canadian Donkey Shows.
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Offline Skul

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #9 on: January 03, 2014, 12:25:37 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on January 03, 2014, 12:21:39 AM
Mama Raven there didn't get bowlegged from digging up potatoes... she got those bow legs the old fashioned way.

Canadian Donkey Shows.
Nasty man.  :asssmack: :asssmack: :asssmack:








 :lmao:  :tongue:
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline CollectivismMustDie

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #10 on: January 03, 2014, 12:35:10 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on January 03, 2014, 12:21:39 AM
Mama Raven there didn't get bowlegged from digging up potatoes... she got those bow legs the old fashioned way.

Canadian Donkey Shows.

 :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Wife poked her head in the room again and gave me another strange look.

I'm dying over here.  :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:

CMD

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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #11 on: January 03, 2014, 12:45:00 AM »
Quote from: CollectivismMustDie on January 03, 2014, 12:35:10 AM
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Wife poked her head in the room again and gave me another strange look.

I'm dying over here.  :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:

CMD

For God's sake, man. Whatever you do, don't say "Canadian Donkey Show" out loud. You'll be up half the night trying to explain it while acting like you don't really know what it means.
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Offline CollectivismMustDie

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #12 on: January 03, 2014, 01:26:35 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on January 03, 2014, 12:45:00 AM
For God's sake, man. Whatever you do, don't say "Canadian Donkey Show" out loud. You'll be up half the night trying to explain it while acting like you don't really know what it means.

For some reason I read that with an image something like this in my mind:



:rotf:

CMD

I'm having more fun here than I did in ten years moling/trolling DU.  :-)

CMD



« Last Edit: January 03, 2014, 01:29:24 AM by CollectivismMustDie »
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"Be not intimidated... nor suffer yourselves to be wheedled out of your liberties by any pretense of politeness, delicacy, or decency. These, as they are often used, are but three different names for hypocrisy, chicanery and cowardice." - John Adams

Hillary Clinton will never be the President of the United States.

Offline txradioguy

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #13 on: January 03, 2014, 04:21:43 AM »
A ghost movie isn't the reason that something saying "hug me" or "I love you" and has a big red heart that glows scares the shit out of Wee Willie.

Those things frighten him because they are things Raven never said showed or revealed when raising this bottom feeding turd.
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Offline Freeper

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #14 on: January 03, 2014, 06:29:29 AM »
His wife has to check the closet for monsters before he goes to sleep at night.
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #15 on: January 03, 2014, 06:38:03 AM »
Quote from: Freeper on January 03, 2014, 06:29:29 AM
His wife has to check the closet for monsters before he goes to sleep at night.

The monster is in the bed, young Mrs. P. That foul, drunken ****er will turn his impotent rage to the nearest weak target- or targets.

Hope the young Mrs. P. has an escape plan for the baby and her.
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Offline 98ZJUSMC

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #16 on: January 03, 2014, 06:51:24 AM »
Quote from: Charles Henrickson on January 02, 2014, 11:14:00 PM
Meet William Rivers Pitt. International best-selling author. Influential thinker and leader in a vast political movement. Dutiful son, devoted husband, doting father. Little does he know it, but William Pitt is about to enter a strange new world, another dimension in time and space. That's the signpost up ahead. His next stop . . . the Twilight Zone.


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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #17 on: January 03, 2014, 07:46:49 AM »
Quote from: Charles Henrickson on January 02, 2014, 11:14:00 PM
Meet William Rivers Pitt. International best-selling author. Influential thinker and leader in a vast political movement. Dutiful son, devoted husband, doting father...

That doesn't sound very much like the William Rivers Pitt we all know so well...

 :-)
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Offline NHSparky

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #18 on: January 03, 2014, 07:53:28 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on January 03, 2014, 12:21:39 AM
Mama Raven there didn't get bowlegged from digging up potatoes... she got those bow legs the old fashioned way.

Canadian Donkey Shows.

Dude--this is New Hampshire.  You have no idea how close to home that must hit him.  Which is why I'm laughing as hard as I am now.
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Offline obumazombie

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #19 on: January 03, 2014, 07:54:10 AM »
Quote from: Freeper on January 03, 2014, 06:29:29 AM
His wife has to check the closet for monsters before he goes to sleep at night.




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Offline DefiantSix

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #20 on: January 03, 2014, 10:41:57 AM »
Quote from: Freeper on January 03, 2014, 06:29:29 AM
His wife has to check the closet for monsters before he goes to sleep at night.

She can check 20 times a night, and she'll never find the "monsters".  No matter how real the DT hallucinations seem to the chronic drunk, nobody else will see them.
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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #21 on: January 03, 2014, 11:43:23 AM »
Quote from: DefiantSix on January 03, 2014, 10:41:57 AM
She can check 20 times a night, and she'll never find the "monsters".  No matter how real the DT hallucinations seem to the chronic drunk, nobody else will see them.

The Heiress talks about 'monsters.'  Last night, I told her to pray to God that He send His angels to guard her during the night.  She had great dreams.  Coincidence?  I think not . . .
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Offline DefiantSix

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #22 on: January 03, 2014, 12:04:47 PM »
Quote from: BlueStateSaint on January 03, 2014, 11:43:23 AM
The Heiress talks about 'monsters.'  Last night, I told her to pray to God that He send His angels to guard her during the night.  She had great dreams.  Coincidence?  I think not . . .

My own progeny - and the delight of my eyes - finds the same remedy highly effective, with much the same outcome (great dreams). :cheers1:
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Offline SarasotaRepub

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #23 on: January 03, 2014, 12:39:35 PM »
Bet his kid is on the sauce already. He's clearly loaded in that post.
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Offline Bad Dog

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Re: Will Pitt afraid of baby's toy
« Reply #24 on: January 03, 2014, 03:50:22 PM »
Boy am I behind the power curve.  Is this vrx1fluffy a beta model or is the VRWC already (not unlike Santa) distributing them to DUmmies everywhere?
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