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Author Topic: Okay, this is just making my head spin  (Read 6744 times)

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Offline Mary Ann

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Okay, this is just making my head spin
« on: December 29, 2013, 02:40:30 PM »
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Is it ignorant/ transphobic for a straight man to not want to date transgender women?

anonymous asked:

Is it ignorant/ transphobic for a straight man to not want to date transgender women?


blackfoxx answered:

Mmm kind of did this topic on twitter this week so you if you want more you can check it out @tgirlinterruptd

But the answer is somewhere between no not necessarily but probably so. In that, a narrative of desire around trans bodies does not exist & in that absence one of degradation and shame is offered in its place. So automatically you have sexualities and accompanying desires shaped in a context of transphobia, which both excludes and pathologizes trans bodies as abhorrent.

A lot of male sexuality is also constructed around employing hierarchies of womanhood as trophies, to prove their own worth and engage in a process of gendering themselves through access to womens’ bodies. Within that framework, some hold more currency and others (transwomen) can actually subvert heteronormative male sexualities. The opinions and shared norms of sexuality among peers, performed on womens’ bodies, plays a huge part in constructing their sexuality as well. You can imagine where transwomen fall on this scale. There’s also the fact that most men dont even have enough literacy of our bodies and our lives to even know who we are and if they are attracted to us. And dont attempt to do so because of cisnormativity.

With that being said, we live in the world we live in. If a man chooses not to date a transwoman, whatever the reason, that is his choice (though one probably informed by cisnormativity.) I am however concerned with if, in not dating transwomen, he also reinforces cissexism and transphobia in his words and actions. Everything is not for everybody nor does it have to be (even though ironically transwomen seem to always get the short end of this stick hmmm.) But what are men doing to not actively continue & participate in this cycle of shame around transwomens’ bodies? What are they doing to stop putting our lives at risk? How are they discussing our bodies and lives? In choosing not to date us, are they offering up bioessentialist rhetoric and trying to delegitimize/undermine our genders?

So basically, cisnormativity heavily informs our desires. We should all work through that. If in working through that, you still don’t find yourself attracted to transwomen? Then thats fine, but what are you doing to create & not participate in a society that shames & degrades the concept of desire around transbodies?

I wont make a blanket statement and say that ANY many who doesnt date transwomen is transphobic. But I will say that we live in a transphobic and cissexist society. And that most men ARE transphobic and cissexist. And all of those things shape our desires and sexuality.

http://curvellas.tumblr.com/post/71492289830/is-it-ignorant-transphobic-for-a-straight-man-to-not
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Offline Texacon

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #1 on: December 29, 2013, 03:20:43 PM »
And I would reply; why does it matter?

KC
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Offline 98ZJUSMC

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #2 on: December 29, 2013, 03:20:54 PM »
Simply a word mash of disjointed psychobabble to say:  Everything is OK.  Nothing is out of bounds.  No doubt, the author of that mutli-paragraph non-sequitur considers him/herself highly intelligent.

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And that most men ARE transphobic and cissexist. And all of those things shape our desires and sexuality.

Perfect example. What?
« Last Edit: December 29, 2013, 03:22:57 PM by 98ZJUSMC »
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #3 on: December 29, 2013, 03:23:15 PM »
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Is it ignorant/ transphobic for a straight man to not want to date transgender women?

No.

Next question.
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Offline Carl

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #4 on: December 29, 2013, 03:49:09 PM »
I don`t want a chick that once had a dick .
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Offline BattleHymn

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #5 on: December 29, 2013, 04:14:41 PM »
XY can never be XX, and vice versa, not matter how many parts you saw off or stitch on.
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Offline dane

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #6 on: December 29, 2013, 04:30:04 PM »
Quote from: Carl on December 29, 2013, 03:49:09 PM
I don`t want a chick that once had a dick .
H5 for the excellent summation.
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Offline ScubaGuy

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #7 on: December 29, 2013, 05:17:47 PM »
Quote from: Carl on December 29, 2013, 03:49:09 PM
I don`t want a chick that once had a dick .

 :cheersmate:
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Offline SSG Snuggle Bunny

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #8 on: December 29, 2013, 06:22:30 PM »
Quote from: Texacon on December 29, 2013, 03:20:43 PM
And I would reply; why does it matter?

KC

Because apparently we are morally obligated to make them feel emotionally accepted.

Which further proves how useless and worthless liberals truly are.
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Offline Big Don

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #9 on: December 29, 2013, 06:26:43 PM »
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #10 on: December 29, 2013, 06:29:37 PM »
Quote from: Carl on December 29, 2013, 03:49:09 PM
I don`t want a chick that once had a dick .
Hater.

The whole phobic/phobia label is just ignorant.  The left got their ass handed to them this week after throwing around that term thinking they could shout down public opinion.
« Last Edit: December 29, 2013, 06:35:31 PM by Chris_ »
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Offline Freeper

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #11 on: December 29, 2013, 06:52:22 PM »
So how long is it going to be if young men who are straight will be called homophobic for not wanting to date men?
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Offline kraven

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #12 on: December 29, 2013, 07:12:31 PM »
Does this make me homophobic? I believe homosexual sex acts are perverted, unnatural and a sin in the eyes of the Lord. I do not believe people are born homosexual and believe homosexual desire stems from mental illness and/or abuse.

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Offline Zathras

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #13 on: December 29, 2013, 07:53:22 PM »
Sorry but there's just no way in hell that I would date (or be seen with for that matter) a man who has mutilated themselves in the false belief that they're a woman trapped in a man's body.
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Offline sybilll

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #14 on: December 29, 2013, 08:21:59 PM »
Quote from: Freeper on December 29, 2013, 06:52:22 PM
So how long is it going to be if young men who are straight will be called homophobic for not wanting to date men?
Dayum, you must be Kreskin>>> I'm a straight male who doesn't date men. Is that homophobic? http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4246760  Very long campfire, to boot. 
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Offline Freeper

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #15 on: December 29, 2013, 08:30:17 PM »
Quote from: sybilll on December 29, 2013, 08:21:59 PM
Dayum, you must be Kreskin>>> I'm a straight male who doesn't date men. Is that homophobic? http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4246760  Very long campfire, to boot. 

Damn what a stupid thread, those people are insane.
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #16 on: December 29, 2013, 09:08:54 PM »
What if the queer who had the dickoffame surgery is actually a panther? How about that?

I think this would make a hell of an episode on DUck Dynasty.

What would those beardy boys think of a homo with a homemade coochie?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024245263

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Offline DUmpsterDiver

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #17 on: December 29, 2013, 10:46:21 PM »
Quote from: BattleHymn on December 29, 2013, 04:14:41 PM
XY can never be XX, and vice versa, not matter how many parts you saw off or stitch on.

Wouldn't these morphodykes be high maintenance with all their mutilated nonsense?  If they don't keep taking their anticocktails won't they become bearded ladies with hairy chests?  That would spoil a marriage I would think.
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Offline obumazombie

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #18 on: December 30, 2013, 04:52:31 AM »
At this point, what difference does it make ?
I'm not a big fan of the french but they did trademark "Viva Le Differance".


edit punc.
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Offline Tucker

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #19 on: December 30, 2013, 05:40:48 AM »
Quote from: Carl on December 29, 2013, 03:49:09 PM
I don`t want a chick that once had a dick .

One that was attached, anyway.
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Offline b-ONE-b

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DUmp thread of the year? "Are you transphobic if you won't date a Transgender?"
« Reply #20 on: December 30, 2013, 10:41:12 AM »
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4245263

Quote
Mr Scorpio

Is it ignorant/ transphobic for a straight man to not want to date transgender women?

HappyMe

I think I would probably date a transgendered guy. One of my neighbors is in the female to male process. One of the most fearless people I know. Very dry sense of humor and smart as hell.

Arcanetrance

I am a straight man I dated a male to female transgendered individual for a year and a half it had nothing to do with sex as much as we had a really deep love for each other. But than my most recent Ex was a woman who was born a woman. The idea of you have to do certain things and act a certain way to be straight always bothered me.

Cinnabonbon

If the only reason he's not dating the woman is because she's trans then yes, that is transphobic. If he's attracted to her in all the other ways, but hates the fact that she is trans, that is a shame.



This has potential to be non-stop entertainment. One primitive already got in trouble for calling trannies "fake women". A thundering herd of DUmmies came rushing in to protest that trannies are "fake" anything.

CLASSIC...

edit to add: Arcanetrance, you claim to be straight but admit to dating a trannie... let me break it to you, you're gay.
« Last Edit: December 30, 2013, 10:45:23 AM by b-ONE-b »
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: DUmp thread of the year? "Are you transphobic if you won't date a Transgender?"
« Reply #21 on: December 30, 2013, 10:48:30 AM »
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Offline b-ONE-b

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Re: DUmp thread of the year? "Are you transphobic if you won't date a Transgender?"
« Reply #22 on: December 30, 2013, 10:55:15 AM »
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Offline Gern

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #23 on: December 30, 2013, 12:41:03 PM »
This thread topic at the DUmp seems silly at first...But is actually insidious.

Make no mistake:  This is what leftists would bring us to if they had their way--Thought Police. 

Even thinking that you're not attracted to a transgendered person would be a punishable offense.  As far fetched as it seems, I could see eventually anti-discriminatory dating laws coming into effect, where something as crazy as a transgendered person suing someone because they weren't hit on at a bar or the grocery store.

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Offline Dori

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Re: Okay, this is just making my head spin
« Reply #24 on: December 30, 2013, 12:46:50 PM »
Transphobic?  really?   :thatsright:


I have lots of phobias.  Don't I qualify as a minority victim too? 

 









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