It is with most humble worshipful awe and reverence that one congratulates nadinbrzezinski, winner of the Nadin Abbott award, the “nadin,†for the primitive who impressed the most with her God-like wisdom and understanding this past year…..and intolerance towards those primitives who dared challenge her deity, her all-knowingness, her perfectness.
This is the first year for the award, and the first winner could’ve only been cousin nadin.
But surprisingly, she had competition, including
, walrus-face, the ProSense primitive, the freeloading stewert primitive, and the magisterial one. Considering these, one’s mystified that the big guy from Omaha wasn’t also on the ballot for this particular honor, given his own “worship me, and give me things, because I am me, having given the gift of my person to you.â€
Nevertheless this competition, this race was over before it even got started.
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As in the case with the winner of the “Rob,†since cousin nadin is obviously destined for an award greater than this, one is reluctant to use the good stuff on this lesser award; and suffice it to say that anyone who reads journo Vlada Mitty is already familiar with her style; “I
know all there is to know, so
don’t dare doubt me.â€
The Divine Wrath is swift and sure; relegation to Hell, the ignoble “iggy list.â€
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One wonders about the psychological genesis of this “I am God†mind-set. Nearly every human wishes he or she were God, all-perfect, all-knowing, all-encompassing, but understands at the same time this isn’t the case. When decent and civilized people come to this realization, they accept, adapt, and move on. When primitives come to this realization, while they don’t like it, they at least grudgingly accept it.
And surely cousin nadin, when looking at herself in a mirror or trying to buy oblate-spheroid-shaped clothing or reading the expressions on the faces of others as they see her, can see she more resembles Medusa than Aphrodite.
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qui crediderit, non etiam ipse Deus, qui stulti porcum--he who thinks himself God fools not even a pig.