Dennis the Menace lets cat out of bag: he's a lunatic

[BannedFromDU]

Star Member Denninmi (6,415 posts)

I have a mental health issue. Ok, call it mental illness if you like. That doesn't mean that ...
... it doesn't mean a lot of things. It doesn't mean that I'm a bad guy. It doesn't mean that I'm immoral, or that it's some kind of "punishment from God for your sins." It doesn't mean that I'm dysfunctional in real life, in society. It certainly doesn't that mean I'm a danger to anyone with the possible exception of myself under the worst of circumstances, although honestly I am more in control and at peace with that issue, it was something done out of desperation - I grew up a lot, what can I say. It doesn't mean I need to be spoken down to, treated like a child, or treated like I can't make informed rational decisions about life matters big or small. It doesn't mean I can't hear people when they make comments. It doesn't mean I deserve to be excluded or isolated or ignored. It doesn't mean I can't live next door to you, you will never know any of this unless I choose to tell you, otherwise, I'm just the guy next door. It doesn't mean I can't do any of the things anyone else in this society does. It certainly doesn't mean that I fit the stereotypical image among the Teahadist set that I, like many other groups, am a ne'er do well slacker bucking for a handout from the evil gubmint.

It sure as Hell doesn't mean I deserve to painted with a broad brush and lumped together in anyone's minds with seriously disturbed people like Adam Lanza or Jared Loughner or James Holmes or Ariel Castro or the woman who died the other day in DC after the altercations at the WH and the Capitol. Because I am nothing like them, I have a radically different medical mental health diagnosis and issues than any of them, and to think that my problem, PTSD, is like their problems is to say that Lung Cancer and Myeloid Leukemia are the same condition. This has happened, although it's mainly a knee-jerk reaction to a tragedy, it tends to go away, and it's only a handful who say things like this.

Bluntly, in the past 14 months, I received death threats from a client, which caused essentially a "nervous breakdown" although the current term in use is "to be in crisis" I guess. That brought up extreme memories of a childhood with an extremely abusive and violent father. I went to a doctor who totally misdiagnosed me and gave me a completely inappropriate medication. Who also made me go to a psychiatric day hospital program essentially against my will, and I was afraid to say "no". Because of that, my self esteem crashed, I thought my life would be over, that I could never recover from this, and I tried to kill myself one morning. Obviously didn't work. Had a big wake up call in the hospital program, I realized I had to fight for myself. I also realized, slowly, that what I had been told about what was wrong with me was ... wrong, very very wrong. And I came to investigate the Dr, and found out she had serious issues of competency. As well as serious issues of having a miserable, cruel, dictatorial personality and absolutely no bedside manner. So, I did all of that, I survived it, I've tried to pick up the pieces of my life to the best of my ability. I have struggled constantly with the concept of stigma, I have obsessed about people IRL discovering this information. I have practiced self-stigma to the extreme, so much so that I have wished at times I had gone through with ending it. I found a psychiatrist who is the complete opposite of the first one, a joy to work with. I see a therapist weekly. I take good old fashioned cheap generic Prozac, it's working now. I have good days and bad days. I work hard now to improve my health, physical and mental. None of this is a secret in the online community known as DU, especially on a handful of select forums/groups. And, I have had great supporters, a few detractors,and a few haters who have hurt me.

The bottom line, though, in the real world, I am as functional, if not more so, than I ever was. I work full time, take care of a house, a dog, an elderly mother with health problems, I cook and clean, cut my lawn and pay my taxes, I do everything anyone else in suburban America does. But, I have felt isolated, "different", "other" and alone because I am "the crazy guy". In a land of 2 second soundbites passing for in-depth coverage, the uninformed wouldn't know the difference between PTSD versus Schizophrenia versus Personality Disorders versus Unipolar Depression -- they lump them, and the people who have them, all together into a broad category, "the crazies", "the psychos", "the nuts." Alas, there are a lot of uniformed people out there, as we all know, and a lot of stupidity in America, which explains things like the Tea Party in the first place. So, I guess mental health issues wouldn't be any different.

I have a new outlook on the issue, now. There is a favorite song of mine, "Everybody's Broken" by Bon Jovi, "It's ok to be a little broken, everybody's broken in this life". That is true, very few people go through life without problems, and very few of us are completely "adjusted" psychologically all the way around, we all have quirks and issues, because we are human. I am very, very slowly IRL telling a tiny handful of people what I have shared here, only those I feel I can trust without being judgemental, without reacting as if I were radioactive, without leaving me. And, to date, of the few people I have trusted, the reaction has been, well, outstanding, nothing but kindness and support, I think it has actually brought us closer together.

Yet, in America, the mentally ill are still open season. Politically, a football to be tossed around in the debate over guns, over health care, over civil rights and responsibilities versus public safety. Socially, the mentally ill are one of the few groups that it's still socially acceptable to mock, to deride, to make fun of. In terms of public health policy, we are the orphan child, lip service is paid to the need for increased funding, treatment, but in real terms it seems to be cut, not increased, and it is very , very hard for those without private insurance and ability to pay to get adequate treatment, often any treatment. There is still discrimination in housing, employment. On a personal level, these issues can tear families apart, cause people to lose relationships, to end up isolated, even "shunned" so to speak.

I am not willing to accept any of that for myself. Yes, I have problems, I struggle. I'm trying to deal with them. Again, unless I choose to tell you, you won't have a clue that I have a mental health issue. I didn't ask for this, I certainly don't want it, but it is what it is, I will deal with it to the best of my ability.

Mostly, though, I wrote this post for one reason. I AM SICK OF BEING ASHAMED. I felt so much shame and guilt, like I didn't even belong in public among the "normal" people. Like I wasn't good enough. Like I had done something horribly wrong. Like I was bad, evil even. And, I beat myself up for a year with all of this, feeling lower than low. And, I know none of this is true, intellectually, but emotionally it's hard to accept that I am still a good person, even though I have a mental illness, that I still have worth and value in society, that people can still accept, like, and maybe even love me. That I still belong.

Because that is all I am asking for, a little kindness, a little understanding, acceptance of the fact that people such as myself with a mental health issue still belong. We are not "other" -- we are you, part of humanity. Think about it.

Is this, like, his manifesto prior to going on a murder spree? Anyone near this loon, DUCK.

[JohnnyReb]

I'm having a "crisis"....I read the first 3 large paragraphs of that.

[Karin]

I did the first two sentences then scrolled down to see how much.  Stopped there.

[Ralph Wiggum]

I did the first two sentences then scrolled down to see how much.  Stopped there.

At least the lunatic used paragraphs.  Unlike many of the other mentally ill DUmmies.

[Dori]

Is this, like, his manifesto prior to going on a murder spree? Anyone near this loon, DUCK.

I was thinking the same thing while reading the long..."yawn"...

 

PTSD again?   

[Chris_]

Reading the first sentence of each paragraph, it's somewhat coherent, though mostly whining with no real point.  Why do DUmmies have to talk so much?

[Ralph Wiggum]

Denninmi (6,415 posts)

I have a mental health issue

Should be the motto of the Democrat Underground.

[BlueStateSaint]

I did the first two sentences then scrolled down to see how much.  Stopped there.

You too?

[Carl]

I still bet the "client" threatened to kill him over something that happened with his child.

[franksolich]

At least the lunatic used paragraphs.  Unlike many of the other mentally ill DUmmies.

Yeah, doesn't that drive you nuts?

I dunno if many here are aware of it, but when one us brings over a campfire from a nut on Skins's island, to make it more readable--and they should be read--we paragraphize it ourselves.

It's like their nutty minds can't comprehend the idea of "paragraphs."

And so kudos to Dennis the Menace for this.

[BannedFromDU]

I have a mental health issue. Ok, call it mental illness if you like.

Most of you guys do. You're in good company.

 That doesn't mean that ...
... it doesn't mean a lot of things. It doesn't mean that I'm a bad guy. It doesn't mean that I'm immoral, or that it's some kind of "punishment from God for your sins."

Like anyone on DU is going to say it is. Even when you're looning out, you find a way to mock religious people. Asshole.

 It doesn't mean that I'm dysfunctional in real life, in society.

Actually, that's EXACTLY what it means. Are you saying you're only a loon on the internet?

 It certainly doesn't that mean I'm a danger to anyone with the possible exception of myself under the worst of circumstances, although honestly I am more in control and at peace with that issue, it was something done out of desperation - I grew up a lot, what can I say.

I'd rather let other people be the judge of that. You're way high on the list of potential mass murderers.


 It doesn't mean I need to be spoken down to, treated like a child, or treated like I can't make informed rational decisions about life matters big or small.

That could be debated.


 It doesn't mean I can't hear people when they make comments.


My guess is that all the comments are coming from the people who live between your ears.

 It doesn't mean I deserve to be excluded or isolated or ignored. It doesn't mean I can't live next door to you, you will never know any of this unless I choose to tell you, otherwise, I'm just the guy next door.

Who is about to go postal.


 It doesn't mean I can't do any of the things anyone else in this society does. It certainly doesn't mean that I fit the stereotypical image among the Teahadist set that I, like many other groups, am a ne'er do well slacker bucking for a handout from the evil gubmint.

What does welfare have to do with this? You said you're a nutbar, not a sponge. Are you a sponge, too?



It sure as Hell doesn't mean I deserve to painted with a broad brush and lumped together in anyone's minds with seriously disturbed people like Adam Lanza or Jared Loughner or James Holmes or Ariel Castro or the woman who died the other day in DC after the altercations at the WH and the Capitol.

Not for you to judge, nutbar.


 Because I am nothing like them, I have a radically different medical mental health diagnosis and issues than any of them, and to think that my problem, PTSD, is like their problems is to say that Lung Cancer and Myeloid Leukemia are the same condition. This has happened, although it's mainly a knee-jerk reaction to a tragedy, it tends to go away, and it's only a handful who say things like this.

You don't have PTSD, you stupid co-opting faggot. You have Faggoty Sad Boy Disease.



Bluntly, in the past 14 months, I received death threats from a client, which caused essentially a "nervous breakdown" although the current term in use is "to be in crisis" I guess.


A client? What are you, a male escort?

 That brought up extreme memories of a childhood with an extremely abusive and violent father. I went to a doctor who totally misdiagnosed me and gave me a completely inappropriate medication. Who also made me go to a psychiatric day hospital program essentially against my will, and I was afraid to say "no". Because of that, my self esteem crashed, I thought my life would be over, that I could never recover from this, and I tried to kill myself one morning.

Sounds like that doctor was onto something, then.


Obviously didn't work. Had a big wake up call in the hospital program, I realized I had to fight for myself. I also realized, slowly, that what I had been told about what was wrong with me was ... wrong, very very wrong. And I came to investigate the Dr, and found out she had serious issues of competency.

Of COURSE she did. She probably called you a faggot for co-opting a serious disorder for your own gay-ass benefit.


 As well as serious issues of having a miserable, cruel, dictatorial personality and absolutely no bedside manner. So, I did all of that, I survived it, I've tried to pick up the pieces of my life to the best of my ability. I have struggled constantly with the concept of stigma, I have obsessed about people IRL discovering this information.

You ARE "IRL," you turd.


 I have practiced self-stigma to the extreme, so much so that I have wished at times I had gone through with ending it.

I got caught doing self-stigma when I was in high school. My dad had a long talk with me, told me to make sure the bathroom door was locked next time.


 I found a psychiatrist who is the complete opposite of the first one, a joy to work with. I see a therapist weekly. I take good old fashioned cheap generic Prozac, it's working now. I have good days and bad days. I work hard now to improve my health, physical and mental. None of this is a secret in the online community known as DU, especially on a handful of select forums/groups. And, I have had great supporters, a few detractors,and a few haters who have hurt me.

You've just projected your illness onto your credit cards.




The bottom line, though, in the real world, I am as functional, if not more so, than I ever was. I work full time, take care of a house, a dog, an elderly mother with health problems, I cook and clean, cut my lawn and pay my taxes, I do everything anyone else in suburban America does. But, I have felt isolated, "different", "other" and alone because I am "the crazy guy". In a land of 2 second soundbites passing for in-depth coverage, the uninformed wouldn't know the difference between PTSD versus Schizophrenia versus Personality Disorders versus Unipolar Depression -- they lump them, and the people who have them, all together into a broad category, "the crazies", "the psychos", "the nuts." Alas, there are a lot of uniformed people out there, as we all know, and a lot of stupidity in America, which explains things like the Tea Party in the first place. So, I guess mental health issues wouldn't be any different.

You're copping to being a shithouse rat loon and you're casting aspersions on the Tea Party?



I have a new outlook on the issue, now. There is a favorite song of mine, "Everybody's Broken" by Bon Jovi, "It's ok to be a little broken, everybody's broken in this life". That is true, very few people go through life without problems, and very few of us are completely "adjusted" psychologically all the way around, we all have quirks and issues, because we are human. I am very, very slowly IRL telling a tiny handful of people what I have shared here, only those I feel I can trust without being judgemental, without reacting as if I were radioactive, without leaving me. And, to date, of the few people I have trusted, the reaction has been, well, outstanding, nothing but kindness and support, I think it has actually brought us closer together.

Eat a dick.



Yet, in America, the mentally ill are still open season. Politically, a football to be tossed around in the debate over guns, over health care, over civil rights and responsibilities versus public safety.

Because you're dangerous. Loughner, Holmes, etc have more in common with YOU than any of us.

 Socially, the mentally ill are one of the few groups that it's still socially acceptable to mock, to deride, to make fun of.

Um, no, that would be white Christian males.

In terms of public health policy, we are the orphan child, lip service is paid to the need for increased funding, treatment, but in real terms it seems to be cut, not increased, and it is very , very hard for those without private insurance and ability to pay to get adequate treatment, often any treatment. There is still discrimination in housing, employment. On a personal level, these issues can tear families apart, cause people to lose relationships, to end up isolated, even "shunned" so to speak.

Because you're crazy.



I am not willing to accept any of that for myself. Yes, I have problems, I struggle. I'm trying to deal with them. Again, unless I choose to tell you, you won't have a clue that I have a mental health issue. I didn't ask for this, I certainly don't want it, but it is what it is, I will deal with it to the best of my ability.


With a semi-automatic rifle, if necessary, I'm sure.



Mostly, though, I wrote this post for one reason. I AM SICK OF BEING ASHAMED. I felt so much shame and guilt, like I didn't even belong in public among the "normal" people. Like I wasn't good enough. Like I had done something horribly wrong. Like I was bad, evil even. And, I beat myself up for a year with all of this, feeling lower than low. And, I know none of this is true, intellectually, but emotionally it's hard to accept that I am still a good person, even though I have a mental illness, that I still have worth and value in society, that people can still accept, like, and maybe even love me. That I still belong.


You do belong: away from people who don't want to be killed by you.



Because that is all I am asking for, a little kindness, a little understanding, acceptance of the fact that people such as myself with a mental health issue still belong. We are not "other" -- we are you, part of humanity. Think about it.


Translation: "I'm horny."

[USA4ME]

Denninmi (6,415 posts)

I have a mental health issue. Ok, call it mental illness if you like. That doesn't mean that... it doesn't mean a lot of things.

It doesn't mean that I'm a bad guy. It doesn't mean that I'm immoral. It doesn't mean that I'm dysfunctional in real life, in society. It certainly doesn't that mean I'm a danger to anyone. It doesn't mean I need to be spoken down to, treated like a child, or treated like I can't make informed rational decisions about life matters big or small. It doesn't mean I deserve to be excluded or isolated or ignored. It doesn't mean I can't live next door to you. It doesn't mean I can't do any of the things anyone else in this society does.

You're right, being mentally ill doesn't place you in any of those categories, per se.

However, being a liberal does.

.

[franksolich]

By the way.....speaking of.....

Has anyone seen the subway cat lately?

As far as I know, her last sighting was when her loving, caring sisters got her set up in a nut house, and she yakked about that.  She was pretty mellow about it, even though she'd had to give up her snake and her cats, and so one reasonably concludes she was on some really good drugs, which one hopes she still is.

That was, oh, two, three, months ago?

I'm suspecting she's in the sort of nut house where the inmates can't use the internet.

And that's very good for her.

[USA4ME]

UGP needs to be wrapped up tighter than Hannibal Lecter.

.

[Ralph Wiggum]

By the way.....speaking of.....

Has anyone seen the subway cat lately?

As far as I know, her last sighting was when her loving, caring sisters got her set up in a nut house, and she yakked about that.  She was pretty mellow about it, even though she'd had to give up her snake and her cats, and so one reasonably concludes she was on some really good drugs, which one hopes she still is.

That was, oh, two, three, months ago?

I'm suspecting she's in the sort of nut house where the inmates can't use the internet.

And that's very good for her.

Early September

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,90525.0/

[BannedFromDU]

By the way.....speaking of.....

Has anyone seen the subway cat lately?

    Hahahahahaha....even on a site that mocks him, he can't get much attention.

[BattleHymn]

I take good old fashioned cheap generic Prozac, it's working now.

Nuggets like this can only be mined at the DUmp. 


Good old fashioned Prozac?  Are you stupid?  For cripes sakes, it's a DRUG, not apple pie or baseball! 

[Vagabond]

Because I am nothing like them, I have a radically different medical mental health diagnosis and issues than any of them, and to think that my problem, PTSD, is like their problems is to say that Lung Cancer and Myeloid Leukemia are the same condition. This has happened, although it's mainly a knee-jerk reaction to a tragedy, it tends to go away, and it's only a handful who say things like this.

No, you don't have PTSD.  People that have much worse cases than me still function normally.  You may have had a mental break of some sort due to stress, but you don't have PTSD.  Quit trying to co-opt it.

[GOBUCKS]

One clue to detect a real cracked nut at the DUmp:

These loong, rambling, endless, pointless posts are almost always the work a boiling lunatic.

That isn't just my layman's opinion.

Dennis has been officially, professionally diagnosed as a lunatic.

Every time he shows up at the DUmp, he confirms that diagnosis.

It sure as Hell doesn't mean I deserve to painted with a broad brush and lumped together in anyone's minds with seriously disturbed people like Adam Lanza or Jared Loughner or James Holmes or Ariel Castro or the woman who died the other day in DC after the altercations at the WH and the Capitol.

Well, yes Dennis, it sure does. Until the split second when Lanza, Loughner, Holmes, and the crazy lady actually snapped, they were loony nuts just like you.

I'll give pass on the Ariel Castro deal. Dennis doesn't have Castro's balls.

[I_B_Perky]

Star Member Denninmi (6,415 posts)

I have a mental health issue. Ok, call it mental illness if you like. That doesn't mean that ...

<rest of incoherent babble>

Dummie? If you want to get better, you have to A) want to get better and B) quit posting at the dump.

I suspect you will do neither so my advice is to off yourself.