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Author Topic: Tav's latest news  (Read 2709 times)

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Offline Aristotelian

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Tav's latest news
« on: August 17, 2013, 10:10:48 AM »
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Taverner (54,262 posts)

I didn't get the job. ****all.

**** the wagon

**** everyone

**** it ALL

DUmp Link

 :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2013, 10:39:07 AM »
Don't get on the wagon and ride it to a job interview still smelling of cheap wine.
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Offline Delmar

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2013, 10:42:55 AM »
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Response to Taverner (Original post)Fri Aug 16, 2013, 10:33 PM
 applegrove (59,632 posts)
1. ((((Hugs)))) There is great happiness once you've quit the booze, found a decent job,

and are growing again. You gotta hold onto that.

Did you hear that Taverner?  You'll be happy just as soon as you give up the booze and find a good job.  Well, it was nice knowing you.
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Offline Aristotelian

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2013, 10:50:20 AM »
Quote from: Delmar on August 17, 2013, 10:42:55 AM
Did you hear that Taverner?  You'll be happy just as soon as you give up the booze and find a good job.  Well, it was nice knowing you.

No way Tav will ever do that though.
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Offline Ralph Wiggum

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Re: Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #4 on: August 17, 2013, 11:03:50 AM »
Didn't Taverner recently say that there were 6 or 8 bars right by his office.

To paraphrase Mr. Solich, all DUmmies lie, all the time.
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #5 on: August 17, 2013, 11:19:54 AM »
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Response to Taverner (Original post)Fri Aug 16, 2013, 10:33 PM
 applegrove (59,632 posts)
1. ((((Hugs)))) There is great happiness once you've quit the booze, found a decent job,

and are growing again. You gotta hold onto that.

Then again there's always the sweet release of death, so you could just double down on that white horse...

 O-)
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #6 on: August 17, 2013, 11:21:08 AM »
No!

How could anyone resist hiring an alcoholic heroin addict?

I'm getting a whiff of discrimination against his eggplant-shaped head.
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Offline Bad Dog

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #7 on: August 17, 2013, 11:39:44 AM »
Tav and Dennis going over the edge at the same time.  Be still my heart.  What phase is the Moon in right now?
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Offline franksolich

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #8 on: August 17, 2013, 11:47:28 AM »
Quote from: Bad Dog on August 17, 2013, 11:39:44 AM
Tav and Dennis going over the edge at the same time.  Be still my heart.  What phase is the Moon in right now?

Well, the full moon's next Wednesday.
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Offline Splashdown

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #9 on: August 17, 2013, 11:52:43 AM »
could you imagine the alarms, sirens, and flashing lights at the lab when Tav's blood test results came in?

 :panic:
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Offline Aristotelian

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #10 on: August 17, 2013, 12:27:30 PM »
Quote from: GOBUCKS on August 17, 2013, 11:21:08 AM
No!

How could anyone resist hiring an alcoholic heroin addict?

I'm getting a whiff of discrimination against his eggplant-shaped head.


All of that plus the terrible tendency of business to discriminate against obvious slackers in their hiring.
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Offline NHSparky

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #11 on: August 17, 2013, 12:40:06 PM »
You kiddin me?  Guy probably melted the bottle, he pissed so hot.
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Offline Aristotelian

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #12 on: August 17, 2013, 12:51:02 PM »
Quote from: Splashdown on August 17, 2013, 11:52:43 AM
could you imagine the alarms, sirens, and flashing lights at the lab when Tav's blood test results came in?

 :panic:

I'm not so sure - is there any evidence it got as far as the drug test?

Wouldn't the first ten seconds of slurred speech be enough to put an interviewer off him?
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #13 on: August 17, 2013, 01:54:45 PM »
Quote from: Aristotelian on August 17, 2013, 12:27:30 PM
All of that plus the terrible tendency of business to discriminate against obvious slackers in their hiring.
Plus you have to remember the famous post from DUmmy Taverner lamenting how the news media always try to focus only on the negative side of heroin.
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #14 on: August 17, 2013, 02:08:15 PM »
Quote from: Bad Dog on August 17, 2013, 11:39:44 AM
Tav and Dennis going over the edge at the same time.  Be still my heart.  What phase is the Moon in right now?

Let's see...



The Moon is in the seventh house.
Jupiter aligns with Mars.

That means the dysfunctional DUmmies are winding up for an epic display of moonbattery from now until the Age of Aquariums!

Aquariums, aquariums...

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Offline Tess Anderson

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #15 on: August 17, 2013, 03:44:41 PM »
more update - tav is now reassessing his career options:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018458610

Quote





Fri Aug 16, 2013, 11:16 PM

 Taverner (54,262 posts)


The wife thinks I should quit pursuing my career dream


 I want to be in technical sales

I have done well in this

But when the economy went south, I was laid off

And have been able to only land SysAdmin type jobs since

I have been in the running for several sales engineering jobs since, and always made it to the last two, but for whatever reason, didn't get the job
 
Wifey thinks I should abandon this pursuit

I don't

Being an admin makes me want to continue drinking

Notice I said continue

I fell off the dog damn wagon

I deserve my shit


 ::)
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Offline Bad Dog

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #16 on: August 17, 2013, 04:25:40 PM »
Wait a minute.....Does he even have a wife?
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Offline USA4ME

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #17 on: August 17, 2013, 05:21:12 PM »
Quote from:
Taverner

The wife thinks I should quit pursuing my career dream
 
Wifey thinks I should abandon this pursuit

I don't

Don't be so hasty to make a decision. Kick back, have a few drinks, and think about it.

.
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Offline diesel driver

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #18 on: August 17, 2013, 09:07:25 PM »
Quote from: USA4ME on August 17, 2013, 05:21:12 PM
Don't be so hasty to make a decision. Kick back, have a few drinks, and think about it.

.


Nothing clears the head like sitting down and having a beer or 12.   :lmao:
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #19 on: August 17, 2013, 09:12:40 PM »
Poor DUmmy Taverner Kregel sounds down in the DUmps.

Grey Goose and a mainlined speedball will make things look a lot brighter.
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Offline Delmar

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #20 on: August 17, 2013, 09:27:48 PM »
Quote from: Bad Dog on August 17, 2013, 04:25:40 PM
Wait a minute.....Does he even have a wife?

Of course, that amber colored lover that is the wind beneath his wings.
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Offline Mr Mannn

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #21 on: August 18, 2013, 12:08:14 AM »
Quote from: Bad Dog on August 17, 2013, 04:25:40 PM
Wait a minute.....Does he even have a wife?
She took the kids and left him. I doubt they even talk.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #22 on: August 18, 2013, 12:08:30 AM »
Quote from: Mr Mannn on August 18, 2013, 12:08:14 AM
She took the kids and left him. I doubt they even talk.
Liberal family values.
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Offline GCBill

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #23 on: August 18, 2013, 04:57:54 AM »
Quote from: Delmar on August 17, 2013, 09:27:48 PM
Of course, that amber colored lover that is the wind beneath his wings.

Everyone's gotta have at least one reliable friend.

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Offline I_B_Perky

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Re: Tav's latest news
« Reply #24 on: August 18, 2013, 07:45:36 PM »
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Taverner (54,262 posts)

I didn't get the job. ****all.

**** the wagon

**** everyone

**** it ALL

Wanna know why you didn't get the job, Tav? Cause you are a loser. From head to toe, you are a loser. When one looks up loser in the dictionary, it has your picture as an example. When you walk into a room, the loser odor permeates the whole room. People can smell it a mile off.

Your best bet at a job is to start dealing drugs on the street. You seem to have exceptional knowledge in the field of street drugs. One must go with one's strength... as it were... and your strength seems to be street narcotics. So go for it. You will make some money and the retirement plan is excellent. Free room and board. Free heating and cooling. Free exercise facilities. All you would have to do is worry about some minor details... like getting shanked or raped... but I'm sure you can come up with a solution for that.

So go for it, Tav!!!! Either that or save everyone's time and just off yourself and OD.   :loser: :loser:
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