Mountain Grammy welcomes home addicted daughter

[Vagabond]

I'm not going to make fun here.  I hope this message finds mountain grammy.  I couldn't post what I am about to on DU so I'm posting it here.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/11441069

Tue Apr 30, 2013, 09:25 PM
 mountain grammy (1,677 posts)

My 24 year old daughter is home, withdrawing from heroin.
She's been in the city for 6 years, going to school and working part time. We've been supporting her. She earned her degree in environmental science last year and has been "looking" for full time work ever since. I've been giving her money for a while, and have known deep down that there was something wrong. I'd put $100 in her account, and the next day she would ask for money. I'd refuse, but always give in. Her friends were sleazy and I knew that too. They were mostly flopping at her place, which happens to be a one bedroom condo we own.
We brought her home, she's supposed to start a full time job tomorrow but is sick as a dog with withdrawal. She has suboxone that she got from one of her friends and has used it before when she didn't have access to heroin, which she smokes. She has enough for three days, then she thinks she'll be clean and ok and ready to tackle her new full time job (which she did part time in high school).
I have nothing more to say, this is new to me.. I've had my own addictions, but this is new. 

Response to NMDemDist2 (Reply #7)
Fri May 3, 2013, 06:00 PM
 mountain grammy (1,677 posts)
8. I have too, and am quite concerned. She says she's taking 1/2 strip 2x a day.

This is her 4th day and her second day going to work. She's happy and seems like her old self, but I can't believe anything that comes out of her mouth. It'll take me a long time to trust her again. She says she only has 3 strips of suboxone left, so three days. She's aware of it being addictive.

Response to NMDemDist2 (Reply #9)
Fri May 3, 2013, 06:40 PM
 mountain grammy (1,677 posts)
10. Me too. I'm strongly encouraging her to do that.

If it wasn't for a new job (for her) and her dad, who thinks getting her home and to work will remove her from the environment and all will be well, I'd put her in rehab.
As for removing her from the environment: her first two days were bad and all she had were three suboxone strips, so she checked her bank account, made a call, and that night 4 more strips were delivered.. just that quick. 100 mile from the city and her old environment. I was furious, but it was suboxone, I checked what she got, but just how fishy does this sound? I've taken her ATM card away and will take every paycheck, but I'm afraid she's not as motivated as I'd wish.
As for Alanon, yeah I hear you. I'll need support if I ever get to the point when I'll have to just cut her loose. Thank God she's smart enough to not get pregnant, for now at least.

Response to mntleo2 (Reply #13)
Sun May 19, 2013, 09:08 AM
 mountain grammy (1,677 posts)
14. My daughter is still home and still clean (I think)

We've pretty much taken control of her money.. no money, no drugs.
I honestly don't believe all answers are found through prayer. Four years ago, my 21 year old nephew committed suicide. He'd been on and off drugs and in trouble. The family prayed and prayed.. these are devout people. I will never believe you can igonore all your problems by praying. You have to be involved as much as you can.
My daughter appears to be recovering, but I worry everytime she's out of my sight and not at work and would feel a lot better if she got into a program. I'll keep working on that and am getting into a group myself to learn how.
All the best to you and your son. There are many people here who have given me good advice and hope. I hope this group can do the same for you.

MG, you are in a co-dependent relationship with your  addict daughter.  She asked for money, she got it.  She asks to move home, and take drugs at home, and she got what she wanted.  You think you have control of her and her money, trust me you don't.  I've seen enough people in this exact place to know what choices you, as a family member have to make, for your daughter and yourself.

She's an addict.  She may be dry right now, but that nagging urge is in her mind to just smoke or shoot up because it felt so good.  The very first condition presented to her on the first night should have been no drugs not prescribed by a doctor, not even for a cold, you didn't pass that test, but you should have that rule now.  The second rule should be that she will attend weekly Narcotics Anonymous meetings for at least the first year.  The third rule should be that she has to inform you where she is when she is not at work or at home, who she is with, and when she plans to be home while she lives with you under your roof.  Fourth, violation or telling a lie about any of these three rules results in her immediate ejection from the house, don't worry about her, she has friends that will take her in.

These rules will help your daughter.  They will help you more.  An addict will keep using someone until they are forced to stop, either by the law or because the other person makes them stop.

[jtyangel]

No money no drugs? She must think her drug addict daughter is above prostitution but if she's an addict trust me granny she isn't. That urge for narcotics will overtake her dignity and self respect in those areas and I would guarantee it probably has even if it was only a time or two in her more desperate moments.

[DumbAss Tanker]

Time to count the silverware.  Also the appliances.  Also the yard junk, down to dead car batteries.  I'd say guns, too, but then these are moonbats.

If grammy has actually cut off the dough, stuff will start 'Disappearing' a couple of days after that last dose is gone.  Junkies are the only people who lie as much as DUmmies or Democrats.

[Dori]

I've heard heroin is really hard to get off of.  The girl is only 24, so I think getting her away from that crowd she was with and trying to support her wish to get off drugs is a good thing.

She shouldn't have started a new job yet.  She needs to go camping for a month where there is no access to anything but hiking and fresh air.



 

[USA4ME]

mountain grammy

My 24 year old daughter is home, withdrawing from heroin. She's been in the city for 6 years, going to school and working part time.

Chances are the daughter didn't just decide to turn to heroin in the last 6 years. I bet history would show she was a druggie back when she lived with Mtn. grams and she became more self-destructive after she left.  To take away the culture under which she became what she is now will take more than taking away things from her.  Mtn. grammy better look at herself and how she more than likely set the stage for all that's happening now.

.

[GOBUCKS]

The voice of experience:

Response to mountain grammy (Original post)
Fri May 31, 2013, 09:15 PM
Taverner (53,435 posts)

24. I feel her pain - I've gone off lots of opiates
Kratom worked for me, but then you get hooked on that

Kratom is easier to quit tho...

Kregel has quit heroin many times, but never for longer than a few hours.

[NHSparky]

this is new to me.. I've had my own addictions

Apparently not, dearest mommy.  Ever wonder where your precious little progeny developed those nasty habits?

[GOBUCKS]

I wish that daughter would start posting.

She'd be a great addition to the DUmp.

[Ogre]

Junkies are the only people who lie as much as DUmmies or Democrats.

^5,

The place is infested with addicts already, I wonder what the daughters DUmp name is?

[sybilll]

I've never walked a mile in grams' shoes, but it is easy to deduce that all of the money they have spent enabling her COULD have paid for a first-class rehab.  Sincerely, I wish her well. 

[jukin]

I'm shocked, I tell you shocked.

Having said that, I hope the Dummy takes the correct path this time and actually parents their child. I wish an addiction only on a DUche not anybody that is in their sphere of mal-influence.