Author Topic: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self  (Read 2398 times)

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Offline FiddlingAnt

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I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« on: April 10, 2013, 03:12:28 PM »
The most popular post of my new blog is a story of a liberal high school teacher who has a phone conversation with his 100 year old future self.  He is shocked to find what happens to America when liberal policies are allowed to go unchecked. 

http://fiddlingant.blogspot.com/2013/03/i-phoned-my-100-year-old-future-self.html

My blog, The Fiddling Ant, promotes hard working traditional values with a dash of fun. As a former Democrat, my goal to help convince people of that liberal and progressive actions are damaging to our country and must be avoided at all costs.

You can also find humorous song parodies on my blog.  Here is a sample:

The Lady's Getting Old
Sung to the tune of The Lady Is a Tramp

VERSE
I've rolled along for many years
Was always cool and with it.
The Beach Boys to the Beatles
Their music, I could dig it.
Alas, I missed the boat somewhere,
Cause I’m no longer mod.
Say who’s this Lady Gaga?
How’d she get on my Ipod?
‘Cause now the world spins too fast for me.
My Home Sweet Home is the place to be.
 
REFRAIN 1
I get too sleepy for dinner at eight.
I get insomnia - that leaves me irate.
My spouse’s doctor, he checks his prostrate.
That's why this lady’s getting old.
I don’t play card games all night any mo’.
Won't ride a Harley to Ole Mexico.
Can’t dance to hip hop, I’ve got fungus toes.
That's why this lady’s getting old.
 
I like the fresh new brown in my hair,
Life without care,
I'm broke, That's oke.
Hates winter weather, it’s wet and it’s cold,
That's why this lady’s getting old.
 
REFRAIN 2
I look in the mirror - the scene’s in decline.
I wear bifocals - the newsprint’s too fine.
I check the obits and read ev'ry line.
That's why this lady’s getting old.
I like a body that isn't too fake.
Hand me the Bengay, my back’s got an ache.
Sit me in church and I can’t stay awake.
That's why this lady’s getting old.
 
I got these orthos inside my shoes.
What can I lose?
Their flat! That's that!
Hey, I can’t help it, if I smell like mold.
That's why this lady’s getting old.
 
REFRAIN 3
Don't miss the special, when dinner’s at five.
I don't like funerals-I'm glad I'm alive.
I crave affection, but hey, where’s the drive?
That's why this lady’s getting old.
Kids go out dancing and leave me behind.
I waltz and foxtrot but can’t bump and grind.
Kids don’t play Sinatra, they’re out of their mind-
That's why this lady’s getting old.
 
I like to pass gas whenever I please.
Sail with the breeze.
No dough-heigh-ho!
Love Donny Osmond. I’d kiss him tenfold.
That's why this lady’s getting old.
 
REFRAIN 4
My feet need massaging, they cry and they moan.
Tell Father Time he’s to leave me alone.
I'm not so hot, but my shape is my own.
That's why this lady’s getting old!
The chicks in college are perfect, no doubt.
I wouldn't know what that scene’s all about.
I turn the wrong way and something falls out.
That's why this lady’s getting old!
 
I like the sweet, fresh rain in my face.
Diamonds and lace,
No got-so what?
I’ll keep on singing, till I’ve turned stone cold.
That's why this lady’s getting old.


Offline Gina

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #1 on: April 10, 2013, 03:16:00 PM »
hi?  :)






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline Wineslob

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #2 on: April 10, 2013, 04:10:40 PM »
“The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.”

        -- Marcus Tullius Cicero, 55 BC (106-43 BC)

The unobtainable is unknown at Zombo.com



"Practice random violence and senseless acts of brutality"

If you want a gender neutral bathroom, go pee in the forest.

Offline Big Dog

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2013, 09:02:00 PM »
Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline Big Dog

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #4 on: April 10, 2013, 09:07:21 PM »
Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline thundley4

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #5 on: April 10, 2013, 09:12:11 PM »

Offline FiddlingAnt

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Is Darwinism a Religion?
« Reply #6 on: April 30, 2013, 04:05:36 PM »
With the upcoming publication of Stephen Meyer's Darwin's Doubt, the Darwin disciples are out already attacking the contents of a book they haven't even been able to read. If intelligent design is a waste of time, why the religious ferocity in attacking this alternative explanation to explain the source of life and consciousness? The Darwinists I know sure seem to display a substantial amount of faith in Darwinism to eventually explain the origins of life and the soul, despite a failure of results so far.

http://fiddlingant.blogspot.com/2013/03/stage-this-defending-intelligent-design.html

Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #7 on: April 30, 2013, 04:30:45 PM »
I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self ......but the operator said that phone had been disconnected.
“The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism. But, under the name of ‘liberalism’, they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation, without knowing how it happened.” - Norman Thomas, U.S. Socialist Party presidential candidate 1940, 1944 and 1948

"America is like a healthy body and its resistance is threefold: its patriotism, its morality, and its spiritual life. If we can undermine these three areas, America will collapse from within."  Stalin

Offline Big Dog

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Re: Is Darwinism a Religion?
« Reply #8 on: April 30, 2013, 04:46:32 PM »
With the upcoming publication of Stephen Meyer's Darwin's Doubt, the Darwin disciples are out already attacking the contents of a book they haven't even been able to read. If intelligent design is a waste of time, why the religious ferocity in attacking this alternative explanation to explain the source of life and consciousness? The Darwinists I know sure seem to display a substantial amount of faith in Darwinism to eventually explain the origins of life and the soul, despite a failure of results so far.

http://fiddlingant.blogspot.com/2013/03/stage-this-defending-intelligent-design.html

Evolutionary theory does not concern itself with the soul. Upon what do your "Darwinist" friends base this faith?
Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline Bondai

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Re: I Phoned My 100 Year Old Future Self
« Reply #9 on: May 07, 2013, 12:05:15 PM »
There is no such thing as a "former" democrat... :mental:


"It's mercy, compassion, and forgiveness I lack; not rationality".