Breaking news (because I'm a reporter and all):
Fred, the fictional spirit-guide still suffering from some gassiness due to eating spicy chili with beans, was making a brief stop in the Philippines when he let yet another fart rip. It was ground shaking and showed up between 6.0 and 6.1 on the ripper scale.
It is believed that arrogant and egotistical know-it-alls may be disappointed that the ground shaking wind breaking did not result in a deadly tsunami.
In other news, pretend reporter believes having an app makes her a geologist.
Stupidity: is there an app for that?