A Lame Anti-Gun Bouncy Tale From DUmmy rsmithnumbers

[GOBUCKS]

You may recall the epic, unforgettable cover letter DUmmy rsmithnumbers wrote for his wife's resume.

He was obviously proud, and posted it for DUmp comments. It was one of the most hilarious DUmp posts of the past couple of years.

(If anyone still has the link, please post. It belongs in a folder along with CalPig's Aching Seed.)

Today, that same crippled intellect was put to work on a bouncy. The result is no better than that classic cover letter:

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 11:58 AM
rsmith6621 (6,367 posts)

My Breakfast Was Interupted By STUPID


Wife and I went to breakfast this morning in McMinnville OR early this morning. The place is always packed so we figured it must be good.

We ordered our meal and we were mostly done eating when 2 men and a women sat down next to us. They had the Oregonian and broke it up so each could read it. One of the men was reading a bit loud an article on the CT mass murders and then stopped and and said "Yep Obama's going to get his way and he is going to take our guns away from us...we need to impeach him like Clinton"

They sat and ragged more on the guns rights issue all the while I locked my eyes on them. One of them looked over at me and smiled and I said "Tell me when and where Obama said he was going to take your guns away from you....and do you think you are more honest than Obama,REALLY.

I closed up my comments by saying, I lost some of my libertys and constitutional protected privacy over 9/11 at the hand of a republican president,you do remember Bushjr dont you?... If gun organizations cant get their shit together you dont deserve to own them.Gun ownership comes with responsibility so take it.

The cancelled their meal order and sipped up the last of their coffee and left.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021999503
His eyes locked on them! He nailed them with Blue Steel!

I can feel the stupid oozing out of every sentence. That last one is a beauty.
 

Response to rsmith6621 (Original post)
Sun Dec 16, 2012, 12:05 PM
 Bluzmann57 (11,388 posts)
4. Why do these fools always yell?

I haven't met a righty yet who doesn't end up yelling to try and get their (inane) point across. Good for you for pointing out the truth.
One more thing, I have been hunting in the past and refused to touch alcohol until after the days activities were done. An awful lot of people drink while hunting and that leads to bad things. I wonder if the guy you encountered at breakfast was drunk? Or just stupid?

 
I've hunted all my life and have never heard of even a single person drinking before or during a hunt.

But this is DUmmy Bluzmannnumbers, and he's stupid enough to believe this lame bouncy.

[Freeper]

rsmith6621 (6,367 posts)

My Breakfast Was Interupted By STUPID


 


Wife and I went to breakfast this morning in McMinnville OR early this morning. The place is always packed so we figured it must be good.

We ordered our meal and we were mostly done eating when 2 men and a women sat down next to us. They had the Oregonian and broke it up so each could read it. One of the men was reading a bit loud an article on the CT mass murders and then stopped and and said "Yep Obama's going to get his way and he is going to take our guns away from us...we need to impeach him like Clinton"

They sat and ragged more on the guns rights issue all the while I locked my eyes on them. One of them looked over at me and smiled and I said "Tell me when and where Obama said he was going to take your guns away from you....and do you think you are more honest than Obama,REALLY.

I closed up my comments by saying, I lost some of my libertys and constitutional protected privacy over 9/11 at the hand of a republican president,you do remember Bushjr dont you?... If gun organizations cant get their shit together you dont deserve to own them.Gun ownership comes with responsibility so take it.

The cancelled their meal order and sipped up the last of their coffee and left.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021999503

I don't think I've seen a bouncy where the freepers canceled their orders and left before. 

maryellen99 (665 posts)
1. these people make me sick

whats more important to these people: their precious guns or the fact that 18 little kids were killed.

Thank you for speaking up!

The fact that this massacre took place makes a damn good argument for allowing good and decent people to be armed. The bad guys don't care about the laws so when you disarm the good people the bad ones will  have a hell of an advantage.

meanit (94 posts)
3. The right wing's sympathy for the murdered kids lasted a long time, huh?

I'd bet those people probably have "I'm the NRA" stickers on their cars, too.
And yes. people like them ARE the NRA

Like always they rush to blame the NRA.

Bluzmann57 (11,388 posts)
4. Why do these fools always yell?

I haven't met a righty yet who doesn't end up yelling to try and get their (inane) point across. Good for you for pointing out the truth.
One more thing, I have been hunting in the past and refused to touch alcohol until after the days activities were done. An awful lot of people drink while hunting and that leads to bad things. I wonder if the guy you encountered at breakfast was drunk? Or just stupid?

 

elehhhhna (26,236 posts)
6. my response --

Really? Twenty children slaughtered in three minutes and YOU'RE the victim? Wow. You're amazingly self-involved.

 

[Delmar]

My Sunday Morning Bouncy Ball Search Was Interupted By STUPID.

 

[Big Dog]

I went to breakfast this morning at a local roadhouse. The waitress knows me, and brought my coffee. As I sat drinking coffee and reading the paper, my friend Scott joined me. We talked about the school shooting.

The waitress brought another cup, and heard our conversation. She said, "I saw the news reports on the TV, and I just wanted to go home and hug my babies."  My friend said "Yup." I said nothing; there was nothing more to say.


I'm starting to lose my patience with the DUmmies.

[shadeaux]

My Wife's New Cover letter.

http://sync.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1129392

[Chris_]

My Wife's New Cover letter.

http://sync.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1129392

lol

[GOBUCKS]

My Wife's New Cover letter.

http://sync.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1129392

Thanks! That's great. It belongs in the hall of fame, with "The Aching Seed", "I'm Opening A Pie Shop", "I Want You People To Understand One Thing", and "The Bootheel Cat".

[Chris_]

ohheckyeah   (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore   Wed May-18-11 06:39 PM
Response to Original message
20. I hate to tell you
but all that letter will accomplish is getting her resume thrown in the trash.

Please, take the advice in the thread and re-write the letter.

[Delmar]

The funny thing about the rsmith# letter isn't so much his wife's stupid cover letter as the advice from the other Cheeto eating, dope smoking DUmmies who fancy themselves hotshot human resource management experts.

[DLR Pyro]

Why can't you DUmmies mind your own ****ing business and quit butting into the conversations of people who have differing opinions from your own?

[delilahmused]

rsmith6621 (6,367 posts)

My Breakfast Was Interupted By STUPID


 


Wife and I went to breakfast this morning in McMinnville OR early this morning. The place is always packed so we figured it must be good.

We ordered our meal and we were mostly done eating when 2 men and a women sat down next to us. They had the Oregonian and broke it up so each could read it. One of the men was reading a bit loud an article on the CT mass murders and then stopped and and said "Yep Obama's going to get his way and he is going to take our guns away from us...we need to impeach him like Clinton"

They sat and ragged more on the guns rights issue all the while I locked my eyes on them. One of them looked over at me and smiled and I said "Tell me when and where Obama said he was going to take your guns away from you....and do you think you are more honest than Obama,REALLY.

I closed up my comments by saying, I lost some of my libertys and constitutional protected privacy over 9/11 at the hand of a republican president,you do remember Bushjr dont you?... If gun organizations cant get their shit together you dont deserve to own them.Gun ownership comes with responsibility so take it.

The cancelled their meal order and sipped up the last of their coffee and left.

Why I know this is fake:

1. Well, it's a DUmmie
2. As with every other issue ad nauseum there will be a flurry of topical bouncies where the DUmmies always come out looking like Einstein and the conservative like a caveman. By about the 4th or 5th one, even the DUmmies won't believe them anymore.
3. They were reading the Oregonian...I repeat...the OREGONIAN. There's a reason Lars Larsen calls it "the daily dead fish wrapper", it's not good for anything else. It's a combination of Pravda & NYT.
4. Were some asshole really to interrupt their conversation, a conservative would tell him to shut the hell up and mind his own damn business.
5. It's a condition of these kinds of bouncies that the party to be corrected by said DUmmie is always talking loudly. However, in real life one never observes any such thing, even in the checkout line at the grocery store.
6. If they cancelled their order and left, why the hell would they bother "sipping" up the last of their coffee? Wouldn't they: a) gulp it and then leave or b) just leave and forget the stupid coffee.
7. They would have a better understanding that when you impeach a president it doesn't necessarily mean he steps down or that he won't continue to push his pet causes.
8. They would have a better understanding of the 2nd Amendment and the balance of power to know that there's no freaking way the boy could "take their guns" all by himself regardless of how much power he & they think he has.
9. They would have reminded the DUmmie that 0bama has doubled down on the patriot act to include domestic surveillance and President Bush never sent a drone to kill an American citizen without due process.
10. They would've told the DUmbshit that "gun organizations" have nothing to do with anything as they neither regulate nor sell weapons themselves so there's no "shit" to get together.

Basically what we have here "... is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

Cindie

[blitzkrieg_17]

Why I know this is fake:

1. Well, it's a DUmmie
2. As with every other issue ad nauseum there will be a flurry of topical bouncies where the DUmmies always come out looking like Einstein and the conservative like a caveman. By about the 4th or 5th one, even the DUmmies won't believe them anymore.
3. They were reading the Oregonian...I repeat...the OREGONIAN. There's a reason Lars Larsen calls it "the daily dead fish wrapper", it's not good for anything else. It's a combination of Pravda & NYT.
4. Were some asshole really to interrupt their conversation, a conservative would tell him to shut the hell up and mind his own damn business.
5. It's a condition of these kinds of bouncies that the party to be corrected by said DUmmie is always talking loudly. However, in real life one never observes any such thing, even in the checkout line at the grocery store.
6. If they cancelled their order and left, why the hell would they bother "sipping" up the last of their coffee? Wouldn't they: a) gulp it and then leave or b) just leave and forget the stupid coffee.
7. They would have a better understanding that when you impeach a president it doesn't necessarily mean he steps down or that he won't continue to push his pet causes.
8. They would have a better understanding of the 2nd Amendment and the balance of power to know that there's no freaking way the boy could "take their guns" all by himself regardless of how much power he & they think he has.
9. They would have reminded the DUmmie that 0bama has doubled down on the patriot act to include domestic surveillance and President Bush never sent a drone to kill an American citizen without due process.
10. They would've told the DUmbshit that "gun organizations" have nothing to do with anything as they neither regulate nor sell weapons themselves so there's no "shit" to get together.

Basically what we have here "... is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

Cindie

All that, plus it was an overly long tale about a confrontation/conversation that never happened. H5. Also they need to just ****ing stop with the Sandy Hook bouncies. Very poor taste but hey, it's the DUmp.

[Airwolf]

The answer to that ****sticks question is when did Obama say he was coming after guns is in the middle of the press conferance he held Friday afternoon. It's one more example of the many times he has pushed for gun control and he isn't going to stop. The only good thing about it is he is the number one reason gun sales are as high as they are.

[AprilRazz]

Where do these people go to be privy to conversations like this?

[Freeper]

Where do these people go to be privy to conversations like this?

The are hearing the voices in their head.

[I_B_Perky]

Where do these people go to be privy to conversations like this?

The are hearing the voices in their head.

Happens every time they get off their meds.

[Rebel]

maryellen99 (665 posts)
1. these people make me sick

whats more important to these people: their precious guns or the fact that 18 little kids were killed.

Thank you for speaking up!

And it would have been quickly averted by a .45 caliber round fired by a teacher and hit center mass, you ****ing idiot. 

[jukin]

Want to get a big bang for restricting our freedoms, ban automobiles. 11 deaths per 100,000 for automobiles. Only 3 homicides per 100,000 due to firearms.

[blitzkrieg_17]

Nothing says "I'm a soulless, classless @sshole" like making up a story like this 48 hours after a tragedy just to score political points.

[zeitgeist]

Nothing says "I'm a soulless, classless @sshole" like making up a story like this 48 hours after a tragedy just to score political points.

Unless you use your bouncy to diss your parents in the bargain like this one did. 

http://upload.democraticunderground.com/10021996704

Robyn66 (1,519 posts)

This was what it was like to grow up with a gun nut for a father.
Last edited Sun Dec 16, 2012, 12:15 AM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

My father has always been a gun nut.

I don't know how many guns he has now but I guarantee its enough to arm a small country and he has some pretty serious big weapons. I don't know what they are but they are big. I think he has an AK 47 among other assault rifles.

My father has guns of all sizes, he never leaves the house without one. He has a holster and a gun that will fit just about anywhere and he needs it "for protection"

When I was growing up it wasn't easy.

When I was a teenager, I actually never did anything or went anywhere but my parents always said I was "bad"

one day, after I refused to break up with a boyfriend they didn't like, I found myself being dragged in to the kitchen by my hair. My father was there and I suddenly had a gun in my face. I was told that if I didn't break up with the boy he would disappear.

There was another time when I was 16 that he kicked in the door of my room and unloaded an entire gun full of blanks at me, and he thought it was the funniest thing in the world. It gave me ptsd.

Roughly 6 years after I got married my mother died at the age of 51 of lung cancer.

Then my father started to drink too.

I have two brothers who lived with him at the time, one still does.

He would get drunk and shoot bullets in to the floor and leave the casings around and think it was funny for my brothers to see it.

He would call me drunk and tell me he was "playing with his guns" to the point that when the phone would ring I would turn white start shaking and practically throw up.

Now you may be wondering why I didn't call the police on him. Well that's just the problem. He was a cop at the time, so there would be no way that would work out well.

We finally moved away, and my father remarried. I keep my kids away from him because he still drinks and plays with his guns but he tells everyone I am a real bitch to keep his granddaughters away from him.

My childhood was abusive in different ways but I think the gun thing was almost the worst. I have tried to talk to him about it and he alway says 'parents make mistakes' he has never acknowledged the damage he did and says I never could take a joke.

Now if you ask the other cops and a lot of people on the outside they would all say he is a "responsible gun owner" he locks them up and stores them correctly but he was not behaving in a responsible manner as far as I am concerned. But there it is.

A while ago I sent a friend an e-mail about how important it is for a girl to have a good father. I dont know if he knew all of this, but having a bad father is just about the worst thing in the world.

 

Now how much of this is true and how much of it is because she didn't get that silky pony she wanted is anyone's guess. But the DUmpsters lap it up like kittens warm milk and then spin a few bouncy with in a bouncy stories of their own ( think Shakespeare's play with in a play motif).

This is straight from "The day I can't due my job drunk is the day I hang up my gun and badge."  genre.
 

[Jasonw560]

Okay, it may be the (ex) English major in me, but did anyone else start to correct her punctuation errors?

She needs to be introduced to my good friend, Mr. Semicolon.

[DLR Pyro]

Unless you use your bouncy to diss your parents in the bargain like this one did. 

http://upload.democraticunderground.com/10021996704

Now how much of this is true and how much of it is because she didn't get that silky pony she wanted is anyone's guess.


 

its a "composite" story.

[GOBUCKS]

its a "composite" story.

It's fake but accurate.

[zeitgeist]

Okay, it may be the (ex) English major in me, but did anyone else start to correct her punctuation errors?

She needs to be introduced to my good friend, Mr. Semicolon.

Every English major needs at least one good Shakespeare joke.  This may not be it but here ya go.

Little Johnny and his mother are walking into a grocery store in Dallas Texas when two cowboys come strutting out.

Little Johnny looks at his mother tugs on her sleeve and says "Ma, ma, look at those f##cking bowlegged cowboys.

His mother is aghast, grabs little Johnny by the arm, drags him back to the car, and speeds off home.

All the way home she lectures little Johnny on his foul language. Once home she confines little Johnny to his room with a volume of Shakespeare.  She tells little Johnny to read the Bard and reflect on his future use of the English language.

After two weeks of confinement and constant reading of the Bard, back they go to the grocery. As luck would have it the same two cowboys are just exiting the store.

The mother glares down at little Johnny and says "Well, do you have anything to say?"

Little Johnny looks up and says " Alas my Queen, what fools be these that march their balls hung in parentheses?"

Then too, one wonders if the world would be better if she never missed a period either.

[Karin]

   Cute joke, Zeitgeist! 

Oh, an Rsmith bouncy!  He garners a vote from me every year just for the bouncies.  He casts himself as the lead character, and portrays himself as the nastiest creep, in addition to being the stupidest.

"Tell me when and where Obama said he was going to take your guns away from you....and do you think you are more honest than Obama,REALLY.

What is it about this sentence that's puzzling me?  Seems to be a non sequitur.  What make you think you're more honest than Obama?  What does that have to do with anything? 

At any rate, of course it's bullshit.  No conservative would cancel breakfast just because a snivelling liberal is in the next booth.