Hopehoops' wife jumps to his defense (long)

[Tess Anderson]

http://sync.democraticunderground.com/1018246355

TMI is an understatement:

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 05:00 PM
Ruby Reason (229 posts)

Cross-post from Meta. I'm HopeHoops' wife.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1240174603

Sorry for posting the entire message, but Hope Hoops previously mentioned to me that most Lounge "Lizards", sorry if I've offended any amphibians, don't venture into Meta-discussion (actually it is my first). Here's the text I posted. Please go to the above link to reply. There's no sense in keeping two threads on the subject alive...

----

Let me introduce myself...

I am Hope Hoops wife.

Please allow me to give you my point of view, although it is lengthy and H.H. has always accused me of being so on paper. Sorry.

I am a daughter.

My father was a WWII vet. He instructed art and drafting classes at the local high school and was an active presence at most school board meetings. Having served as a school board member myself in a very different district I understand his struggle. I had two of my daughters while serving and nursed them during meetings.

My father raised my half sister with very little help from her biological mother and parented her solely through her high school years. At the only school board meeting that I remember as significant as a small child, my father fought for girls to be allowed to wear pants to school. I was in Kindergarten, my sister was in second grade. My father pointed out that while there was nothing inherently wrong with dresses or skirts, that it was wrong to require girls to wear them to school. That it kept girls from a variety of privileges that boys took for granted. Privileges such as warmth in winter, the ability to move their bodies in any direction during play or practice without exposure, and so on. He won that case. The very next morning, my sister and I were the only two girls to wear pants to school. We continued to wear them unless we requested a dress. My sister often did, I remember requesting my favorite dress once. My father highly respected my husband and considered H.H. one of his closest friends until the day he died. Hope Hoops felt the same way about my father.

I am a rape victim. H.H. knows that. I was still a child. It was a one time event. I was not “asking for it”.

I work with children on a variety of levels and I still believe in the old saying, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” Words only hurt if you let them.

I am a parent to three intelligent, confident, talented, and beautiful daughters. (O.K. perhaps I'm a bit biased.)

My husband and I have raised our children to be strong women. Our oldest ran a charity for four years in high school which raised money for a food bank, an orphanage, and a shelter for abused women. They are not afraid of people, not for race, gender, creed or any other reason. My father was a sailor and talked like a sailor. My husband will often say before leaving to do grocery shopping, “Do you girls need ***** pads?” It isn't an issue. They are not afraid of words either. They are intelligent enough to understand the concept and intent behind the words, and not so little as to be hung up on somebody else's perception of what might be polite.

I am a professional. I have a B.S. in Elem. Ed./ Early Childhood and a M.S. in Elem. Ed..

I am well aware that there is a proper time and place to use specific words. The man I married is no less. However, DU is not a professional work environment, it is not a school, it is not a court of law, it is not even a public venue. It is a social network. It differs little from a writing forum, an antique interest forum, or ...ahh...Facebook. People who share a common interest getting together to chat. Yes, rules are important, but they are there to guide not commit and shun.

In public my husband is a perfect gentleman. In public you can overhear somebody's conversation whether you want to or not. You hear about, “Uncle Joe's foot fungus” as two women ride on the bus beside you or about somebody's colonoscopy as you stand in line at the checkout and they prattle on their cell phone. On DU everyone has a choice to avoid such unpleasantries. You can, as I choose to do, scroll past those members you do not care to read or you can hit the IGNORE button. Not such a difficult option.

I am a probable mother-in-law.

The young gentleman in question is in the Army reserves. He is Hispanic (we are whitebread, “crackers” as my middle daughter refers to herself, sorry if I have offended any Caucasians out there). He invited a close friend we had not yet met to our house. The friend was African American. He introduced the friend as, “This is my buddy, ---. He's black.” I responded, “That's alright blacks are allowed here, its the spics we don't like.” As we readied ourselves for a huge watergun battle. My oldest daughter offered the two fellows sunscreen. Our reservest teasingly said, “He's a ****** and I'm a spic, we don't need any of that.” My middle daughter took the sunscreen handed it to our guest and said, “Well now we know that he doesn't.” And after our African American guest applied the sunscreen our youngest daughter jabbed my probable son-in-law to be and stated, “He'll have great skin when he is your pallbearer.”

Typical? Maybe not. Wrong? Only in some people's eyes.

I am a third degree black belt.

When I was a child my father wanted my sister and I to be confident and safe. He enrolled us in Judo classes (the only self-defense offered in my small hometown at the time). No it didn't save me from the rape, I am well aware of that. Still once we became parents, my husband and I wanted to enroll our children in self-defense. They are all now second degree blackbelts in Tang Soo Do, a level which is considered “instructor”. We most likely have more weapons in our house than the whole rest of our neighborhood combined. But “we learn to fight, so we don't have to”.

I am a DU member.

Yes, it was Hope Hoops who got me interested. And I remain a member while my husband is tombstoned. I'm only active in a few areas, mostly what you might refer to as “family or hobby” areas. I usually look over the news, occasionally breeze through The Lounge, read a bit in a few political arenas I find interesting (I guess most would call me a lurker). Then I hit my main areas of interest, generally once a week and that's it. I am well aware of the types of things my husband posts. Occasionally I read what he says with great interest. Other times I find it boring. But most of the time he is just another Duer that I sometimes run across.

I am not ashamed of anything he has posted. I am well aware of the language he uses on such a social website. I am not defending him. He is a big boy and can take care of himself. I am irritated that other members would try to use me as some poor unaware victim of his. I am ashamed that many women are so weak as to not be able to see past the words and look at the whole picture. I am angered that somebody would call my husband a bully, or misogynist, or self-victimizer all the while hiding behind the guise of non-bigot, rape victim, female sensitive.

I don't know everything my husband Hope Hoops has posted. I don't stalk him. I don't need to. I trust him implicitly.

I am done.

I will be on DU again. I don't need to hide that fact from my husband. I will be on in the same areas I've always been on. Might try some new ones. I won't put in my two cents on this subject anymore, since basically I threw my piggy bank out. Yes, I apologize for the long read.

I will say that what you have done to my husband, who is the greatest supporter of my three daughters and myself, is not fair.

Thank you.

 

[Freeper]

My husband will often say before leaving to do grocery shopping, “Do you girls need ***** pads?

Yeah he's a real gentleman. 

[USA4ME]

Just some well placed cameras in their singlewide and we got ourselves a new sitcom.

.

[franksolich]

Oh man.

It must've broken HopeHoops' heart, or ruined his life, or something, to be so down about getting mausoleumed on Skins's island.

Hey.  It's the internet.  It's not real life.

If franksolich were to be banned from conservativecave, I think somehow I'd go on with life.

Damn.

[Evil_Conservative]

My husband will often say before leaving to do grocery shopping, “Do you girls need ***** pads?

If my husband ever said that, he would have to walk home from the grocery store.

[GOBUCKS]

Had this DUmbass not been tombstoned, I think coach would have had to consider adding a member to his short list of drek primitives.

He may have been the most vulgar DUmpmonkey ever.

[Chris_]

Lounge "Lizards", sorry if I've offended any amphibians,

I really hope that's a joke.

[Chris_]

If my husband ever said that, he would have to walk home from the grocery store.

I thought it was funny.

[BadCat]

he has his wife get on the Dump and defend him.

he's the only person in his house who needs a ***** pad.

[Chris_]

I forgot what got him banned... I had to look it up.

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,81203.0

Uh oh.

[Evil_Conservative]

he has his wife get on the Dump and defend him.

he's the only person in his house who needs a ***** pad.

H5 

[miskie]

Wait - there is actually someone married to DopePoops ? Poor woman, I feel bad for her..

[shadeaux]

Hope Hoops, you sorry sad nasty little man. 

I don't believe his wife wrote that, allows him to use that language at home nor do I believe she posts at the DUmp.

There were 6 females in my home growing up.  My brother and step father never used that kind of language. NEVER.

I raised 3 males, that includes a husband  .  While there were times the talk got colorful, never did they utter such nastiness.  Neither did any of their numerous friends that were always at our home.

The man disrespects the females in his home and brags about it.  He's a POS.

HopeHoops (47,675 posts)

So, what was the first thing YOU ate today?
 
Potentially naughty thread. The SECOND thing I ate was breakfast - an egg, cheese and hot sauce tortilla wrap.

HopeHoops (47,675 posts)

8. That's potentially naughty.

I can't post what I had for breakfast.

HopeHoops (47,675 posts)

16. Funny, I had snatch for (whoops).

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10185860

Do you know how pathetic you are when you beg to get back on the DUmp ? 

[GOBUCKS]

Do you know how pathetic you are when you beg to get back on the DUmp ? 

Like Pam Dawson, or the hopeless alcoholic Will Pitt?

[Evil_Conservative]

“This is my buddy, ---. He's black.” I responded, “That's alright blacks are allowed here, its the spics we don't like.” As we readied ourselves for a huge watergun battle. My oldest daughter offered the two fellows sunscreen. Our reservest teasingly said, “He's a ****** and I'm a spic, we don't need any of that.” My middle daughter took the sunscreen handed it to our guest and said, “Well now we know that he doesn't.” And after our African American guest applied the sunscreen our youngest daughter jabbed my probable son-in-law to be and stated, “He'll have great skin when he is your pallbearer.”

Was anyone else disturbed by this?

[Chris_]

Liberals love quoting other people when it lets them use derogatory language they claim to dislike.

[Evil_Conservative]

Liberals love quoting other people when it lets them use derogatory language they claim to dislike.

It's the most racial slurs I have seen from a DUmmie in one bouncy post... kind of shocked me.

[Traveshamockery]

Hope Hoops, you sorry sad nasty little man. 

I don't believe his wife wrote that, allows him to use that language at home nor do I believe she posts at the DUmp.

There were 6 females in my home growing up.  My brother and step father never used that kind of language. NEVER.

I raised 3 males, that includes a husband  .  While there were times the talk got colorful, never did they utter such nastiness.  Neither did any of their numerous friends that were always at our home.

The man disrespects the females in his home and brags about it.  He's a POS.




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10185860

Do you know how pathetic you are when you beg to get back on the DUmp ? 

OMG - he is a disgusting pig. 

[jtyangel]

he has his wife get on the Dump and defend him.

he's the only person in his house who needs a ***** pad.

I was about to post seriously and then read this. Man bc. Lmao over here

[Ballygrl]

My husband will often say before leaving to do grocery shopping, “Do you girls need ***** pads?”

Oh my!

The young gentleman in question is in the Army reserves. He is Hispanic (we are whitebread, “crackers” as my middle daughter refers to herself, sorry if I have offended any Caucasians out there). He invited a close friend we had not yet met to our house. The friend was African American. He introduced the friend as, “This is my buddy, ---. He's black.” I responded, “That's alright blacks are allowed here, its the spics we don't like.”

OMG! and they call us racist? I'd never say or even think anything like that.

[BlueStateSaint]

If my husband ever said that, he would have to walk home from the grocery store.

If I ever used that language to refer to something my wife needed, she'd have the Model 94 ready in a flash--and she'd be entirely correct.

[Skul]

I am not ashamed of anything he has posted.

Speaks volumes about the character of this DUmbellina. (Shamelessly stolen from DAT)
I wouldn't take that scrunt to a dog fight, and bet on her.

[jukin]

Well that did nothing to change my mind that DUchebags are well, douchebags.

[franksolich]

Well that did nothing to change my mind that DUchebags are well, douchebags.

No matter what the primitives do, yeah, it doesn't change my mind.

They're scum.

[jtyangel]

No matter what the primitives do, yeah, it doesn't change my mind.

They're scum.

Just think based on her degree she's an educator of some kind. Great model behavior there. I'd consider him to be a liability with that mouth if I was charged with the educating of young women.