Las Vegas Leviathan weighs in on the weather

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018202857

Oh my.

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts)  Sat Sep 29, 2012, 09:34 AM

So, is anyone out there enjoying some cool fall weather yet? Vegas sure the hell isn't!

I'm looking at the extended forecast on WeatherBug, and there is not a day under 95 degrees in the forecast through to the 5th of October.

Back in August, we had one day where some monsoonal thunderstorms came through and cooled it down to 70 degrees in the afternoon. One day since last April where we could keep the windows open and let a breeze flow through the house. Yes, I know it's Vegas, but goddammit it's almost October!

I'm completely fed up with it. Want to move, have no money to move. Triple digits forecast for Sunday. Give me a break!

So I guess this will be one of those years where we go from over 90 degrees down to the 60s and 70s of autumn in a period of 2-3 days. All we need is one actual, honest cold front! Maybe the week of friggin' Halloween?

It seems to me the Las Vegas Leviathan would have money to move if he got off his ass and went out and got a job.

Notice, please, he doesn't mention the five cats.

I'll bet he ran out of food stamps earlier this month, and ate them.

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts)   Sat Sep 29, 2012, 12:52 PM

2. I understand. Humidity just slays me.

They say a dew point of 50 is when the most sensitive people start to feel discomfort.

I'm one of those people, no doubt about it!

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts) Sat Sep 29, 2012, 02:08 PM
 
5. Yowza...I had no idea.

I know Sacramento and the like can be hot too, but I would never have guessed you'd be that hot this late in the year.

I hope for your sake that it goes away before ours does. At least most of this shit we've had has been really dry with humidity well under 30%.

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts)   Sun Sep 30, 2012, 07:44 AM

14. I'll post in WL/M soon.

It's a pretty long story, and I'm sure the cave ****s can't wait to discuss it

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts)  Sun Sep 30, 2012, 07:42 AM

12. We're blessed with decrepit and hugely expensive AC units.

Our apartment complex is near UNLV and probably a good 40 years old, and I don't think they've ever replaced the air conditioners. So, if you want your apartment even close to 80 degrees on summer days, you can expect your June-August electric bills to be at least triple your November-February ones. And I'm not exaggerating.

That's one of the reasons why we can't afford to move. It's like a Roach Hotel for humans (and roaches).

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts)   Sun Sep 30, 2012, 07:43 AM

13. My wife and I are gaga over Portland. There or somewhere near is where we're moving...someday.

Good luck getting out of Texas!

<<plans to start checking the "help-wanted" advertisements in the Portland, Oregon, area so as to help the Las Vegas Leviathan find a job there.

Maybe the pie-and-jam primitive can help, too.

[RobJohnson]

I open my doors and windows at 10 PM and wake up freezing in the morning.

Of course, I do not have 900 lbs of insulation either.

Friday was my day off, as soon as it started to get warm outside I closed my doors and windows, and my a/c never kicked in and I was very comfortable. But once again, I do not have 900 lbs of insulation either.

I also have to work today, and stop at the store and purchase food with money that I earned.

I wish I had it as bad as the big guy. Free food and rent could come in handy. 

[RobJohnson]

<<plans to start checking the "help-wanted" advertisements in the Portland, Oregon, area so as to help the Las Vegas Leviathan find a job there.

My Nevada town is full of folks from Oregon that live here in the winter to avoid the cold weather. He would bitch no matter where he lived. With all that body heat he just might keep the snow off the roof of his new place in Oregon.

[franksolich]

Well now, Rob, sir, you're not living in a near-windowless apartment cramped with two enormous guys (the Las Vegas Leviathan and the roommate Joe) who sit around passing gas all day.  I don't imagine the place is well-ventilated, and if the cats still survive, their litter-box probably doesn't help the aromatic aesthetics of the place either.

I'll bet it suffocates poor Jeanette.

[RobJohnson]

Well now, Rob, sir, you're not living in a near-windowless apartment cramped with two enormous guys (the Las Vegas Leviathan and the roommate Joe) who sit around passing gas all day.  I don't imagine the place is well-ventilated, and if the cats still survive, their litter-box probably doesn't help the aromatic aesthetics of the place either.

I'll bet it suffocates poor Jeanette.

He could do his civic duty, walk outside, and provide shade for millions.

[franksolich]

He could do his civic duty, walk outside, and provide shade for millions.

He won't, though.

The Las Vegas Leviathan is agoraphobic, and spends all of his time in that dark cramped apartment, playing computer games.

[I_B_Perky]

Systematic Chaos (7,730 posts)  Sun Sep 30, 2012, 07:42 AM

12. We're blessed with decrepit and hugely expensive AC units.

Our apartment complex is near UNLV and probably a good 40 years old, and I don't think they've ever replaced the air conditioners. So, if you want your apartment even close to 80 degrees on summer days, you can expect your June-August electric bills to be at least triple your November-February ones. And I'm not exaggerating.

That's one of the reasons why we can't afford to move. It's like a Roach Hotel for humans (and roaches).

Aaaw!! Poor fat ass dummie. Try working outside in it. All day. You spend all day in the heat then 80 degrees in daggone cool. Oh that's right!!! I forgot!!! YOU DON"T WORK!!!! Well guess what fat ass lazy dummie... you made yourself dependent on the government, now you got to live with it.

As for the AC bills fat ass... try living in a place where it gets cold. Your winter heating bills will be on par with the cooling bills.   

[jtyangel]

Number 1: lose weight

Number 2: does anyone doubt he would be bitching about the rain and cool weather should he ever make his way to portland?

[Evil_Conservative]

Oh for crying out loud... shut your whiny mouth.  It is NOT hot in Las Vegas anymore.  It's just warm.  This is typical weather for "fall" here.  If you don't like having two seasons, MOVE.  PLEASE.  I hate sharing a city with you.

[Evil_Conservative]

Our apartment complex is near UNLV and probably a good 40 years old, and I don't think they've ever replaced the air conditioners. So, if you want your apartment even close to 80 degrees on summer days, you can expect your June-August electric bills to be at least triple your November-February ones. And I'm not exaggerating.

OH GOD!

I lived on the same f-ing side of town as you?  So glad we moved.  Yes, we get it... $200+ energy bills suck.  We had quite a few of those, but then we moved to a highly energy efficient home.

[RobJohnson]

Well now, Rob, sir, you're not living in a near-windowless apartment cramped with two enormous guys (the Las Vegas Leviathan and the roommate Joe) who sit around passing gas all day.  I don't imagine the place is well-ventilated, and if the cats still survive, their litter-box probably doesn't help the aromatic aesthetics of the place either.

I'll bet it suffocates poor Jeanette.

Parts of Las Vegas are much warmer then where I live.

There is a lot of concrete and black asphalt in Las Vegas that traps a lot of heat.

Where I live, it's mostly dirt, some trees and decorative rock. The blacktop street is a few feet away from my front door. I almost need a nap to walk to the mail box. 

My mom has it made, her apartment that is attached to my house has an awesome cross breeze with some really nice steel security doors that let plenty of air in and provide a good view for her cat. Her apartment is on the ground floor with a nice insulated attic. Not everyone in Las Vegas has that...I know people that live on the third or fourth floor and their homes always seem to be warm and there is not much of a breeze.

Gosh, all that natural gas, has to be hard on the poor cat's respiratory system. His poor wife must of gave up on the litter box with all that smell when she walks in the door after her long days at the call center.

[RobJohnson]

Oh for crying out loud... shut your whiny mouth.  It is NOT hot in Las Vegas anymore.  It's just warm.  This is typical weather for "fall" here.  If you don't like having two seasons, MOVE.  PLEASE.  I hate sharing a city with you.

Especially when he takes up half of your city just by himself. 

I'm not skinny. But I do go to work and pay my bills on top of trying to help others when I can.

I had a fat customer call me fat last week as he was buying a bunch of frozen food and candy on his EBT card...he said "I hope this does not make me look like you." I kinda blew him off.... I wanted to say....."I'll keep working, so you don't have to."  If I had to guess, he might of been 20 pounds lighter then me....just the dirt on his clothes was at least five pounds...so gross.

I blew off a full tank of gas last week so I could buy two tickets for our town's carnival to be given to children in need.  A town board member stopped in where I worked, I had someone take my place, ran to the office, grabbed my wallet and handed her $40...I wanted to make sure two kids could enjoy something that most of their friends were enjoying. I still have not rec'd a normal paycheck since I have returned from neck surgery, vacation, etc.....but I like to help kids and knew the kids were getting the tickets, not the parents!

[RobJohnson]

OH GOD!

I lived on the same f-ing side of town as you?  So glad we moved.  Yes, we get it... $200+ energy bills suck.  We had quite a few of those, but then we moved to a highly energy efficient home.

Tree hugger!

$200 is what I spend about every two weeks for the past two months.   I also have a well, so there is no water or sewer bill.

[Bad Dog]

LVL should feel fortunate that at least, it's a dry heat.

[RobJohnson]

LVL should feel fortunate that at least, it's a dry heat.

I enjoy no humidity!

[GOBUCKS]

You may have noticed the leviathan's mention of "WL/M".  DUmpmonkeys like Kirk love to demonstrate how savvy, how tuned-in, how clever they are by sprinkling their posts with obscure acronyms.

Kirk's "WL/M" refers to the DUmp's forum for lardass moonbats, the "Weight Loss/Maintenance" forum.

It's about the deadest forum at the DUmp, except for the "Jobs" forum.

Most DUmmies, like Kirk, don't really want to lose weight.

They see massive obesity as a ticket to the disability gravy train.

[BattleHymn]

Is it just me, or is LVL trying to make a run for a spot in the DOTY awards?

[franksolich]

Is it just me, or is LVL trying to make a run for a spot in the DOTY awards?

Well, this year there's twenty-two spots.

The Top Ten, the Second Ten, and then the Willie and the Steve.

Kirk just might get into the Second Ten somewhere, which is nothing to sneeze about.

[Karin]

The Portland Oregonian lists:

Personal Assistant /Secretary NeededMarathon Marine Service Corp
Portland, Oregon 97202 United States
09/28/2012
Accounting
Personal Assistant/Secretary is needed to work in a fast paced environment,...  More Details ..

Scratch that.

Automotive Technician - Sales & Service - FTOil Can Henry's
Beaverton, Oregon 97006 United States
09/12/2012
Automotive
Oil Can Henry's in Beaverton, Tigard, and Hillsboro are now hiring for Tech...  More Details ..

That sounds like too much work.

Sales Associate, Portland Metro & SW Washington Sleep Country USA- Mattress Discounters
Portland, Oregon 97230 United States
09/20/2012
Entry Level
Sleep Country, an employee owned company, is seeking energetic and outgoing Retail Sales Associates

Mattress salesman?  Insert obvious joke here. 

How about a lot boy?  Could get some exercise doing that.

Service Lot PorterBroadway Toyota
Portland, Oregon 97232 United States
09/24/2012
Customer Service
Broadway Toyota-Scion is  currently  accepting  applications  for  Lot  Attendants  who  are  looking  to  join  our  fast  paced,  high  volume  dealership.      Experience  has  proven  that  the  most  successful  candidate  traits  are:•    Strong  work  ethic  and  desire  to  succeed  •

Nix.

Custodial SubstitutesBeaverton School District
Beaverton, Oregon United States
09/28/2012
Entry Level
Custodial Substitutes 2012-13 school year   The Custodial Substitute is an entry level position that has the potential to turn into a full-time Custodian I position. The custodial substitute will cover absences

Bingo!  A substitute janitor for the public schools!  He could sneak naps in the broom closet.  Spray a little Lysol in the bathrooms, and nobody will ever be the wiser.
 

[franksolich]

I was hoping there's a need for hotel bell-boys in Portland, but couldn't find anything.

Then I thought about theater-ushers, but apparently they don't usher in theaters in Portland any more.

Too bad, because the Las Vegas Leviathan would've looked pretty nifty in one of those red theater-usher uniforms, with cap and a flashlight in his hand.

Somewhere there I saw an advertisement for door-man at a Country Club; the guy in uniform who stands at the top of the steps under a marquee, and summons valets to park guests' cars.

There seems to be a good demand for security guards in Portland.  If the big guy in Bellevue can do it, the Las Vegas Leviathan in Portland could do it too.

[GOBUCKS]

Portland makes a lot more sense than Las Vegas for the boundless bag of blubber.

Remember, the unavailability of 15EEEEEEE shoes results in Kirk being perpetually barefooted.

In Portland, the pavement would be much cooler, so maybe Kirk could defeat agoraphobia and pound the pavement in search of employment.

But he's still barefooted, and unqualified for work as a lifeguard.

What other careers are barefoot-friendly?

[franksolich]

Portland makes a lot more sense than Las Vegas for the boundless bag of blubber.

Remember, the unavailability of 15EEEEEEE shoes results in Kirk being perpetually barefooted.

In Portland, the pavement would be much cooler, so maybe Kirk could defeat agoraphobia and pound the pavement in search of employment.

But he's still barefooted, and unqualified for work as a lifeguard.

What other careers are barefoot-friendly?

Well, security guards are usually just night-watchmen, who go around when nobody else is around.

I imagine the Las Vegas Leviathan could be barefooted in that job; nobody'll see anyway.

[Evil_Conservative]

Especially when he takes up half of your city just by himself. 

I'm not skinny. But I do go to work and pay my bills on top of trying to help others when I can.

I had a fat customer call me fat last week as he was buying a bunch of frozen food and candy on his EBT card...he said "I hope this does not make me look like you." I kinda blew him off.... I wanted to say....."I'll keep working, so you don't have to."  If I had to guess, he might of been 20 pounds lighter then me....just the dirt on his clothes was at least five pounds...so gross.

I blew off a full tank of gas last week so I could buy two tickets for our town's carnival to be given to children in need.  A town board member stopped in where I worked, I had someone take my place, ran to the office, grabbed my wallet and handed her $40...I wanted to make sure two kids could enjoy something that most of their friends were enjoying. I still have not rec'd a normal paycheck since I have returned from neck surgery, vacation, etc.....but I like to help kids and knew the kids were getting the tickets, not the parents!

Carnival?  What's going to be there and when is it?  Is it worth the drive in?  We're always looking for family fun around the area on weekends.

[BattleHymn]

But he's still barefooted, and unqualified for work as a lifeguard.

I don't know, gobucks.  With all that lard, you'd think he'd be incredibly buoyant.  He could sort of float around out there like a vanilla-colored walrus, and if anybody needed help, they could just latch onto him and while the tide pulls him back into shore.    

[franksolich]

Well now, that seems a good opportunity for the Las Vegas Leviathan to pick up a little cash, in a temporary job.

Maybe he can be in the sideshow of the carnival, a double freak as both the fat man and the super-sized feet man?

I'll bet there's some who'd pay admission to gawk.