How do I get my female dog to stop humping my couch pillows?

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

Shock collar...it's what I used to teach my Yorkie not to bark at everything that moves, harmless yet effective.

O M G... we had been drinking and a friend of ours put his lab's bark collar on his own self. We all started laughing when he got zapped by his laughter. It was simply the stupidest thing I have ever witnessed. 

Wasn't that funny I still got the marks on my neck from that....oh wait...nevermind

[Schadenfreude]

Shock collar...it's what I used to teach my Yorkie not to bark at everything that moves, harmless yet effective.

O M G... we had been drinking and a friend of ours put his lab's bark collar on his own self. We all started laughing when he got zapped by his laughter. It was simply the stupidest thing I have ever witnessed. 

Wasn't that funny I still got the marks on my neck from that....oh wait...nevermind

Would you really do something like that? For me? 

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

Shock collar...it's what I used to teach my Yorkie not to bark at everything that moves, harmless yet effective.

O M G... we had been drinking and a friend of ours put his lab's bark collar on his own self. We all started laughing when he got zapped by his laughter. It was simply the stupidest thing I have ever witnessed. 

Wasn't that funny I still got the marks on my neck from that....oh wait...nevermind

Would you really do something like that? For me? 

Sure anything for a laugh

[Airwolf]

Seriously!??!   I sewed all of these things by hand and they are beautiful but every time I turn around the dog is going to town on them.   Throwing things at her head seems to work for like 2 minutes at a time but then she goes right back to it.  In the mornings I find the pillows all over the house where she has taken them on romatic get aways to the breathtaking view in the hall or the serene setting of the bathroom.  She doesn't even bother to buy them wine or dinner.

 I am starting to feel bad for our guests who love to pile them around them while they sit on my couch.  Also, is it bad that guests are allowed to use the pillows but the family shuns them like an open oozing wound?

Well all I can say is if all else fails you may have to get something from a vet or move the dog outside for the most part.

[DixieBelle]

I know, get new pillows that don't smell like boy dog.

[jtyangel]

Seriously!??!   I sewed all of these things by hand and they are beautiful but every time I turn around the dog is going to town on them.   Throwing things at her head seems to work for like 2 minutes at a time but then she goes right back to it.  In the mornings I find the pillows all over the house where she has taken them on romatic get aways to the breathtaking view in the hall or the serene setting of the bathroom.  She doesn't even bother to buy them wine or dinner.

 I am starting to feel bad for our guests who love to pile them around them while they sit on my couch.  Also, is it bad that guests are allowed to use the pillows but the family shuns them like an open oozing wound?

Glue a picture of Rosie O'donnell to each pillow

I think the female guests might have a real issue with sitting on Rosie's face...just sayin'

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

Seriously!??!   I sewed all of these things by hand and they are beautiful but every time I turn around the dog is going to town on them.   Throwing things at her head seems to work for like 2 minutes at a time but then she goes right back to it.  In the mornings I find the pillows all over the house where she has taken them on romatic get aways to the breathtaking view in the hall or the serene setting of the bathroom.  She doesn't even bother to buy them wine or dinner.

 I am starting to feel bad for our guests who love to pile them around them while they sit on my couch.  Also, is it bad that guests are allowed to use the pillows but the family shuns them like an open oozing wound?

Glue a picture of Rosie O'donnell to each pillow

I think the female guests might have a real issue with sitting on Rosie's face...just sayin'

You mean you girls aren't into angry,over weight,loud mouth bull dykes?

[jtyangel]

Seriously!??!   I sewed all of these things by hand and they are beautiful but every time I turn around the dog is going to town on them.   Throwing things at her head seems to work for like 2 minutes at a time but then she goes right back to it.  In the mornings I find the pillows all over the house where she has taken them on romatic get aways to the breathtaking view in the hall or the serene setting of the bathroom.  She doesn't even bother to buy them wine or dinner.

 I am starting to feel bad for our guests who love to pile them around them while they sit on my couch.  Also, is it bad that guests are allowed to use the pillows but the family shuns them like an open oozing wound?

Glue a picture of Rosie O'donnell to each pillow

I think the female guests might have a real issue with sitting on Rosie's face...just sayin'

You mean you girls aren't into angry,over weight,loud mouth bull dykes?

That would be a resounding 'no'. If I'm to get it on with a girl she better at least look as good as me, if not better.

[DumbAss Tanker]

You could try dressing her as a car and introducing her to this guy:  http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,7676.0.html

 

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

Seriously!??!   I sewed all of these things by hand and they are beautiful but every time I turn around the dog is going to town on them.   Throwing things at her head seems to work for like 2 minutes at a time but then she goes right back to it.  In the mornings I find the pillows all over the house where she has taken them on romatic get aways to the breathtaking view in the hall or the serene setting of the bathroom.  She doesn't even bother to buy them wine or dinner.

 I am starting to feel bad for our guests who love to pile them around them while they sit on my couch.  Also, is it bad that guests are allowed to use the pillows but the family shuns them like an open oozing wound?

Glue a picture of Rosie O'donnell to each pillow

I think the female guests might have a real issue with sitting on Rosie's face...just sayin'

You mean you girls aren't into angry,over weight,loud mouth bull dykes?

That would be a resounding 'no'. If I'm to get it on with a girl she better at least look as good as me, if not better.

You must let me know when this momentus occasion occurs. I'll be there with cameras on Oh and just in case

[jtyangel]

You could try dressing her as a car and introducing her to this guy:  http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,7676.0.html

 

I'm not even clicking there since I know exactly which guy you mean. 

[jtyangel]

Seriously!??!   I sewed all of these things by hand and they are beautiful but every time I turn around the dog is going to town on them.   Throwing things at her head seems to work for like 2 minutes at a time but then she goes right back to it.  In the mornings I find the pillows all over the house where she has taken them on romatic get aways to the breathtaking view in the hall or the serene setting of the bathroom.  She doesn't even bother to buy them wine or dinner.

 I am starting to feel bad for our guests who love to pile them around them while they sit on my couch.  Also, is it bad that guests are allowed to use the pillows but the family shuns them like an open oozing wound?

Glue a picture of Rosie O'donnell to each pillow

I think the female guests might have a real issue with sitting on Rosie's face...just sayin'

You mean you girls aren't into angry,over weight,loud mouth bull dykes?

That would be a resounding 'no'. If I'm to get it on with a girl she better at least look as good as me, if not better.

You must let me know when this momentus occasion occurs. I'll be there with cameras on Oh and just in case

There's no need to record such an event unless you are planning on watching it over and over again.

oh...