Well I can guarandamnteeya they don't beat the shit outa them like they deserve! There's a lot to be said for the time our schools had corporal punishment! I never even heard of a "gangsta" back then!
Nah Allo, Kids grow up to imitate the actions of the care giver.
Ever wonder why Adopted kids look like the Adopted parents ??? They mimic the facial expressions, hand gestures of those around them, tilt their heads the same way, smile and cry the same way.
Kids learn at an early age what and what not they can get away with, Daddy is raciest so to get caught beating up on some kid of a race Daddy hates will bring not a good old bend over and belt time but Daddy defending their actions.
I still go by the old school thinking of as the twig is bent so grows the branch. Bonsai trees are great example. Keep the tree pruned and stunted, controll all aspects of its growth then stand back and wonder why the tree cannot grow apples or tomatoes.
Gansta's in school come about from peer pressure and acceptance in the family's and schools. So good parents even those in the work of Child Problems at times face an out of controll child.
California a few years ago had a husband and wife both with PHD in Child Problems and worked with the kids of the wealthiest family's in Holliwood, were arrested on child abuse charges as they at Witt's end had locked their daughter in her room with bars on the window.
My favorite was a man, divorced with custody of his 14 year old son, he a Doctor at the end of his rope took 6 months off from work-- at great cost to him and took the child to Europe and to the middle East. He deliberately stayed in any flee bag hotel, and exposed his son to the worse of the worse living conditions of the Country. He left it up to the kid to either starve or eat goat eyes.
He did not try to temper the gruesome things his son was exposed to, did not make any excuses for the conditions, did not point things out and give a lecture, he just allowed his son to absorb life around them and was there for any questions the son asked. Usually with a what do you think answer and allow the son to form his own beliefs good or bad.
I still run into the Doctor at the Hospital from time to time, too late for me to as my kids were grown, but he now lectures on the point that there is allways some one worse then you, if a kid is acting out even the poorest in this country can find time to take a kid to a methodone clinic, the local jail, volunteer in soup kitchens, visit the homeless tent shelters that spring up.
Some times a kid needs a kick in the ass from reality, scare the shit out of them not from You the parent but to what is out side the doors of their home.
I was raised and raised my own kids to know if they got into trouble unless they were a victim, no way was I to post bail money for them, write to them in jail, it was not ME that owed them support but they that owed me for all the minor heart attacks they caused me. I gave birth to them and it required their loyality in turn for that favor.
A good Ass whip solves nothing then to insure the child fears. This is not respect but fear of the people that love them the most.
