Author Topic: Blonde in Airplane  (Read 2612 times)

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Offline CG6468

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Blonde in Airplane
« on: April 03, 2012, 02:51:42 PM »
This is the story of the poor dizzy blonde flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot.

He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic, calls out a May Day.

"May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead. And I don't know how to fly. Help me! Please help me!"

She hears a voice over the radio saying:

"This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem.

'Now, just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position."

She says, "I'm 5'4" and I'm in the front seat."

"O.K." says the voice on the radio....

The Air Traffic Controller replied, "Repeat after me: Our Father. . Who art in Heaven. . . ..."
Illinois, south of the gun controllers in Chi town

Offline obumazombie

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #1 on: April 03, 2012, 03:35:56 PM »
Blind guy stumbles into an all lady biker bar,
He orders a drink and asks the bartender,
"Do you want to hear a blonde joke"
Bartender says, 'Well, I'm a blonde"
"And I keep a bat behind the bar to hit guys over the head who tell blonde jokes"
"Furthermore the barmaid is a blonde, and is a 3rd degree black belt in Muay Thai"
"There is a blonde sitting on you left, and two sitting on your right, all bigger than 6'2'' and 200lbs"
"So, do you still want to tell your blonde joke ?"
Blind guy says
"Not if I have to repeat it 5 times"
There were only two options for gender. At last count there are at least 12, according to libs. By that standard, I'm a male lesbian.

Offline CG6468

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #2 on: April 04, 2012, 08:09:44 AM »
THIS IS A FRIGHTENING STATISTIC, MOST PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST WORRYING IN RECENT YEARS.

25% of blonde women in this country are on medication for mental illness. That's really terrifying.........

It means 75% are running around with no medication at all!
Illinois, south of the gun controllers in Chi town

Offline rustybayonet

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #3 on: April 04, 2012, 09:26:18 AM »
And they can vote!  [ duck... in-coming] :tongue:
yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery - today is a gift- that's why it's called the "present"

Offline NHSparky

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #4 on: April 04, 2012, 01:49:42 PM »
Whadya call a blonde with two brain cells?

Pregnant.
“Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian.”  -Henry Ford

Offline obumazombie

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2012, 03:13:48 PM »
How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree ?
There were only two options for gender. At last count there are at least 12, according to libs. By that standard, I'm a male lesbian.

Offline docstew

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #6 on: April 13, 2012, 04:55:12 PM »
How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree ?

Wave to her

Offline obumazombie

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Re: Blonde in Airplane
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2012, 05:23:21 PM »
There were only two options for gender. At last count there are at least 12, according to libs. By that standard, I'm a male lesbian.