Author Topic: In the Ladies Room ...  (Read 4400 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Dixie*Darling

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1117
  • Reputation: +133/-25
In the Ladies Room ...
« on: May 10, 2008, 10:00:54 PM »
A gentleman had a serious problem. He made several attempts to enter the men's washroom, but found it to be occupied. A lady noticed that he was walking strangely, taking small steps, and with a look of pain and anxiety on his face.

"Sir," she said, "the ladies room is unoccupied. You may use it only if you promise not to touch the buttons on the wall."

He was about to explode, and would have promised anything, so he agreed to her terms. The relief was pure joy, and as he sat there, savoring the feeling, he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch. Three white buttons were identified with the letters: WW, WA and PP, and there was one red button labeled ATR.

Who would really know if he touched them? He could not just sit there and resist a challenge like this, so he pushed the WW button. Warm Water was sprayed gently on his bottom. Such a nice feeling came over him, the men's washroom didn't have nice things like this. Anticipating even greater pleasure, he pressed the WA button.

Warm Air replaced the warm water, wafted and swirled about, gently drying his underside. He knew what he was going to do when the warm air stopped, and without hesitation, he pressed the PP button. A large Powder Puff caressed his bottom, adding a fragrant smell of spring flowers to his unbelievable pleasure.

The ladies room was far more than a restroom, it was a place of tender loving pleasure! He could hardly wait for the powder puff to quit. When it did he pressed what he knew was going to be the ultimate joy!

He knew he was in the hospital room as soon as he opened his eyes. A nurse was staring down at him with a smirk on her face. "What happened? How did I get here? The last thing I remember, I was in the ladies restroom!"

"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

 :tampon:

Offline Lord Undies

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11388
  • Reputation: +639/-250
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #1 on: May 10, 2008, 10:05:15 PM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 

Offline Wretched Excess

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15284
  • Reputation: +485/-84
  • Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happy Hour
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #2 on: May 10, 2008, 10:22:08 PM »
A gentleman had a serious problem. He made several attempts to enter the men's washroom, but found it to be occupied. A lady noticed that he was walking strangely, taking small steps, and with a look of pain and anxiety on his face.

"Sir," she said, "the ladies room is unoccupied. You may use it only if you promise not to touch the buttons on the wall."

He was about to explode, and would have promised anything, so he agreed to her terms. The relief was pure joy, and as he sat there, savoring the feeling, he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch. Three white buttons were identified with the letters: WW, WA and PP, and there was one red button labeled ATR.

Who would really know if he touched them? He could not just sit there and resist a challenge like this, so he pushed the WW button. Warm Water was sprayed gently on his bottom. Such a nice feeling came over him, the men's washroom didn't have nice things like this. Anticipating even greater pleasure, he pressed the WA button.

Warm Air replaced the warm water, wafted and swirled about, gently drying his underside. He knew what he was going to do when the warm air stopped, and without hesitation, he pressed the PP button. A large Powder Puff caressed his bottom, adding a fragrant smell of spring flowers to his unbelievable pleasure.

The ladies room was far more than a restroom, it was a place of tender loving pleasure! He could hardly wait for the powder puff to quit. When it did he pressed what he knew was going to be the ultimate joy!

He knew he was in the hospital room as soon as he opened his eyes. A nurse was staring down at him with a smirk on her face. "What happened? How did I get here? The last thing I remember, I was in the ladies restroom!"

"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

 :tampon:

the way I heard it, there was one more line:

"your dork is under the pillow"

 :-)

Offline SSG Snuggle Bunny

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 23479
  • Reputation: +2452/-270
  • Voted Rookie-of-the-Year, 3 years running
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #3 on: May 10, 2008, 10:28:28 PM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 
Dumb-ass.

Why do you think they put that string there?...

...

You're supposed to floss after you eat!
According to the Bible, "know" means "yes."

Offline Lord Undies

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11388
  • Reputation: +639/-250
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #4 on: May 10, 2008, 10:31:58 PM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 
Dumb-ass.

Why do you think they put that string there?...

...

You're supposed to floss after you eat!

Now you are just being nasty.   :o

Offline Dixie*Darling

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1117
  • Reputation: +133/-25
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #5 on: May 10, 2008, 10:32:53 PM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 
Dumb-ass.

Why do you think they put that string there?...

...

You're supposed to floss after you eat!

Now you are just being nasty.   :o

 :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Offline Dixie*Darling

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1117
  • Reputation: +133/-25
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #6 on: May 10, 2008, 10:39:30 PM »

Offline Lord Undies

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11388
  • Reputation: +639/-250
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #7 on: May 10, 2008, 10:44:00 PM »


That looks like the plastic thing that gathers the hem on the weather protector on my outdoor grill.

Offline RobJohnson

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8876
  • Reputation: +333/-109
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #8 on: May 11, 2008, 11:20:40 AM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 

I thought your teeth were in the "chopper hopper" next to the bed?

Offline djones520

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4207
  • Reputation: +181/-146
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #9 on: May 12, 2008, 04:47:37 AM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 

Dude...  I was eating...
"Chuck Norris once had sex in an 18 wheeler. Some of his semen dripped onto the engine. We now call that truck Optimus Prime."

Offline Chris_

  • Little Lebowski Urban Achiever
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 46845
  • Reputation: +2028/-266
Re: In the Ladies Room ...
« Reply #10 on: May 13, 2008, 10:16:39 PM »
Quote
"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.

I thought that's what teeth were for. 

 

Dude...  I was eating...

What were you eating, dude?  :rotf:

Good one Dixie!
If you want to worship an orange pile of garbage with a reckless disregard for everything, get on down to Arbys & try our loaded curly fries.