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Author Topic: Gas Station Bouncy  (Read 5449 times)

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Offline JakeStyle

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Gas Station Bouncy
« on: March 15, 2012, 10:36:37 PM »
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Archae (21,833 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail Ignore

 
I was blamed for the high cost of gasoline today.

I had my bicycle at the gas station across the street, putting air in the tires.

Guy in an H2, fills up his gas hog and starts yelling at me.
"You tree-huggers are costing me money!" 

I figures this guy has to be an FIB.
I was right.
Illinois plates, and "liberal hunting license" on back bumper.

I asked the dimwit why he was whining at me since I can't afford a car, and why he *HAD* to drive a fat gas-guzzling H2.

"I need it for my family!"

I remind him a minivan has more room and sucks less gas.

Guy tells me to **** off and roars off down the station's driveway.

I notice guy had a Tea Party window decal.

Today's GOP.

 :whatever:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002429643
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Offline Evil_Conservative

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2012, 10:51:44 PM »
:rotf:

Oh my gosh... too funny.  I wish I could pump gas and watch an argument go down like that.  That might ease the pain at the pump just a tiny bit.
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Offline shadeaux

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2012, 10:55:38 PM »
 :rotf:   :rotf:

You can just feel the hate. I go to the corner gas station all the time with my husband.  I never see truth to power.   :lmao:

I never got one of those Tea Party decals either.    :mad:
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Offline franksolich

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #3 on: March 15, 2012, 10:59:10 PM »
ON its literary merits, that's actually a pretty good bouncy.

It's nice to see not all the primitives have lost their touch at good fiction-writing.
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Offline dandi

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2012, 11:01:38 PM »
Yeah, I know every time I see someone on a bicycle my first thought is, "@!*&$#* driving up gas prices again!"

 :mental:

Seriously DUmmies, there is a Writing Group at the Hive. Go there and get some pointers. Or maybe you have been there and this is the limit to DUers' creative writing chops. Who knows.
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Offline Rebel

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2012, 11:10:53 PM »
Sorry Frank, that shit was weak. Talk about bouncing balls. No cops? No bushes? No cheers from bystanders as he told evil rethuglican off? I award you no bongs, DUmmie, and may God have mercy on your soul.
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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2012, 11:38:16 PM »
Hey! Imaboobi's back!

Used, abused, and discarded by another boyfriend, no doubt.

She's always been a failure in the sack.
Quote
Response to Archae (Original post)
Thu Mar 15, 2012, 08:03 PM
Sarah Ibarruri (17,391 posts) 
4. I'd love for there to be a large study (with brain scans) of right wingnuts

I'm certain their brains are ****ed up.
 

You know, it must be sooo frustrating for nutcase nadin.

She gets her ass handed to her every time she posts one of her wacky tales, but then ludicrous bouncy tales like this one are believed by every monkey at the DUmp.

The crackpot who made up this silly tale gets nothing but true believers, and she catches hell for reporting centipedes of ice in the shithole.
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Offline obumazombie

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2012, 11:41:22 PM »
I know I am repeating myself, but it's so delicious to say, 60 centimeters is a meter.
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Offline Rebel

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2012, 11:55:24 PM »
Hey Sarah, I know the super-secret method to make a woman climax with nothing but two fingers in less than 10 seconds. How's your metrosexual date(s) working out? :stirpot:
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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #9 on: March 15, 2012, 11:57:42 PM »
Quote from: Rebel on March 15, 2012, 11:55:24 PM
Hey Sarah, I know the super-secret method to make a woman climax with nothing but two fingers in less than 10 seconds. How's your metrosexual date(s) working out?
That sounds like a climactic change.
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Offline obumazombie

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #10 on: March 16, 2012, 12:00:44 AM »
Quote from: GOBUCKS on March 15, 2012, 11:57:42 PM
That sounds like a climactic change.
I saw what you did there, but, for a more realistic experience, don't analyze it, FEEL it. Then describe it.
Example,
That FEELS like a climactic change. About a meter's worth.
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Offline Ralph Wiggum

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2012, 12:36:44 AM »
Yawn, that is a bouncy right out of the template.
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Offline delilahmused

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #12 on: March 16, 2012, 01:21:22 AM »
If that were a true story the guy in the H2 would've just run over the ***** on the bike. Problem solved!

Cindie
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Offline Bondai

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #13 on: March 16, 2012, 04:06:20 AM »
Just plain lame...they aren't even trying. :bs:
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Offline diesel driver

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #14 on: March 16, 2012, 04:36:46 AM »
Quote from: GOBUCKS on March 15, 2012, 11:38:16 PM

The crackpot who made up this silly tale gets nothing but true believers, and she catches hell for reporting centipedes of ice in the shithole.


I thought it was centipedes ON ice, like them Ice Capades thingies on TV.   :lmao:

You know, Disney On Ice, Muppets On Ice, NHL Hockey...
« Last Edit: March 16, 2012, 05:06:38 AM by diesel driver »
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Offline thundley4

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #15 on: March 16, 2012, 04:59:29 AM »
That DUmmie is really stooooopid if they're putting air in their tires like Obama told them to , to save gas and they're riding a bicycle.  :-)
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Offline Skul

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #16 on: March 16, 2012, 05:33:35 AM »
Cost of air machines is what now? 75 cents for five minutes (if that)?
They're also placed in a far off corner to be away from normal traffic.
Bike tire takes maybe three seconds to fill.
I haven't seen free air at a station in decades.
The bouncie just doesn't add up.
DUmmie is lying.
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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #17 on: March 16, 2012, 05:48:35 AM »
Quote from: Skul on March 16, 2012, 05:33:35 AM
Cost of air machines is what now? 75 cents for five minutes (if that)?
They're also placed in a far off corner to be away from normal traffic.
Bike tire takes maybe three seconds to fill.
I haven't seen free air at a station in decades.
The bouncie just doesn't add up.
DUmmie is lying.

One local chain of convenience stores--Stewart's--still has free air at their shops that have gas.
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Offline Skul

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #18 on: March 16, 2012, 05:56:09 AM »
Quote from: BlueStateSaint on March 16, 2012, 05:48:35 AM
One local chain of convenience stores--Stewart's--still has free air at their shops that have gas.
I'll be darned.
Bet the added bump in customers easily covers the cost.
Good for them. :cheersmate:
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John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #19 on: March 16, 2012, 06:26:11 AM »
What happened to free air?

I'll tell you. The aircompressors were usually mounted outside and people started stealing them. So stores put them inside and people started cutting the hoses off and stealing the hoses. So stores started keeping the hose inside and you had to ask for the hose and people started walking off them without returning them. Then the stores started charging a deposit to get the hose ....and people started pitching a fit because they got their feelings hurt. "WHAT? I don't look trustworthy?" So stores started letting others mount a "pay compressor" outside and the whole cycle started all over again...So the hell with "free air", your slack/flat tire isn't their problem any more. You leave it sitting out there in the way to long and they'll just call a tow truck.

Do I need to explain what happened to "free water" or an outside source of water?
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Offline hillneck

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #20 on: March 16, 2012, 06:56:43 AM »
 taterguy (25,207 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail Ignore
52. Seriously dude, invest in a floor pump
Pumps at gas stations are designed for car tires, which are much larger than bike tires.



Taterhead actually felt the urge to explain a gas station pump is designed for car tires and that car tires are larger than bicycle tires.  :rotf:
 
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #21 on: March 16, 2012, 07:08:21 AM »
Quote from: hillneck on March 16, 2012, 06:56:43 AM
taterguy (25,207 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail Ignore
52. Seriously dude, invest in a floor pump
Pumps at gas stations are designed for car tires, which are much larger than bike tires.



Taterhead actually felt the urge to explain a gas station pump is designed for car tires and that car tires are larger than bicycle tires.  :rotf:
 


Hey man, you have to remember these are HAA-vard graduates, you know, the mostest intelligent people in the world. 

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Offline Ballygrl

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #22 on: March 16, 2012, 07:39:54 AM »
We have 2 cars and a truck, 1 of the cars is a little compact, costs me over $40 to fill that damn thing up, when Bush was President I was paying around $15.

And Rebel, I sent you a PM, wasn't sure it went through though, the board was acting a little weird for me.
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Offline NHSparky

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #23 on: March 16, 2012, 08:12:40 AM »
I have a battery-powered compressor at home.  Great for bikes, car tires, basketballs, what have you.  Cost all of $20 and has paid for itself several times over.  Amazing how that works.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Gas Station Bouncy
« Reply #24 on: March 16, 2012, 08:19:05 AM »
Quote from: Ballygrl on March 16, 2012, 07:39:54 AM
We have 2 cars and a truck, 1 of the cars is a little compact, costs me over $40 to fill that damn thing up, when Bush was President I was paying around $15.
Yep.  I was spending $25 a week before 2008.  Now it's more like $40, and the price of everything else has gone up with it.
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