Author Topic: Dear Congress  (Read 1184 times)

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Offline Splashdown

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Dear Congress
« on: March 02, 2012, 09:29:50 PM »
Dear Congress,
With all of the healthcare issues in the news, I thought I'd share my demands, since free stuff is the new "right." I want government to pay for my beer. I figure at 2 beers a day, 2, bucks a beer (I like Guinness), the government owes me $1,460 per year. And I shouldn't pay for it. It's a preventative medication. There are many studies which say that beer lowers the risk of stroke, lowers chances of heart disease, and lowers blood pressure. All valuable benefits! Since we're lining up for the government to pay for stuff like "free" contraception, I think beer should be right there on the list. Why should I have to pay for something that would keep me in such good health?

Sincerely,

Splashdown
Let nothing trouble you,
Let nothing frighten you. 
All things are passing;
God never changes.
Patience attains all that it strives for.
He who has God lacks nothing:
God alone suffices.
--St. Theresa of Avila



"No crushed ice; no peas." -- Undies

Offline IassaFTots

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Re: Dear Congress
« Reply #1 on: March 02, 2012, 09:32:42 PM »
Hi 5!

 :cheersmate:
R.I.P. LC and Crockspot.  Miss you guys.

The infinite is possible at zombocom.  www.zombo.com

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." ~ Martin Luther King
 
“Political Correctness is about turning a blind eye to painful reality because your comfortable feelings are more important to you than saving lives and providing quality of life to people who work their ass off to be productive and are a benefit to this great American Dream"  ~Ted Nugent

Offline Chris_

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Re: Dear Congress
« Reply #2 on: March 02, 2012, 09:36:41 PM »
:couch:
If you want to worship an orange pile of garbage with a reckless disregard for everything, get on down to Arbys & try our loaded curly fries.

Offline thundley4

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Re: Dear Congress
« Reply #3 on: March 02, 2012, 09:49:08 PM »
Can I get back pay for all the  money I spent on booze as a single guy since at the time I was trying to get laid and it was for my health?

Offline Splashdown

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Re: Dear Congress
« Reply #4 on: March 02, 2012, 09:52:01 PM »
Can I get back pay for all the  money I spent on booze as a single guy since at the time I was trying to get laid and it was for my health?

See, I think you get double, because you can also include the contraception. Plus, you were most likely providing the booze to your prospective partner. So you were contributing to HER health, as well.

You're a giver, and you should be rewarded for it.
Let nothing trouble you,
Let nothing frighten you. 
All things are passing;
God never changes.
Patience attains all that it strives for.
He who has God lacks nothing:
God alone suffices.
--St. Theresa of Avila



"No crushed ice; no peas." -- Undies