Isn't The Kootch still looking for a state?
If you could fit Kucinich up in a full Carhartt outfit, slap a Tractor Supply ballcap on his head, and stick an alfalfa stem in his teeth, he'd look like a winner.
He'd become an instant local favorite, much like Pitt the Texas cowboy.
If Hillary! can become an upstate New Yorker, and Jay Rockefeller a Mountaineer, then The Kootch can be a Cornhusker.