Official Nomination Thread for the Top DUmmies of 2011 (closed)

[GOBUCKS]

At this late date, overtaking eleven months of sheer, jaw-dropping nadinesque lunacy would require something like an armed meta standoff with the police, or, preferably, a video suicide.

I agree that Taverner is capable of either, but as a nodding intravenous drug addict it's unlikely he has the energy.

[franksolich]

At this late date, overtaking eleven months of sheer, jaw-dropping nadinesque lunacy would require something like an armed meta standoff with the police, or, preferably, a video suicide.

I agree that Taverner is capable of either, but as a nodding intravenous drug addict it's unlikely he has the energy.

I'm still crossing fingers tightly, hoping, though, that the Taverner primitive does something to suddenly propel himself forward.

[thundley4]

I'm still crossing fingers tightly, hoping, though, that the Taverner primitive does something to suddenly propel himself forward.

I hope Fox News carries the story and highlights his connection to DU.

[franksolich]

I had some unexpected free time this evening, so this update:

Top DUmmie of 2011 (twenty selected):

Atman (Pedro Picasso, the Polaroid Kid)
bobbolink
cali (the bitter old Vermontese cali primitive)
cbayer (the thread slayer)
Chan790
Cyrano (Oscar Wilde, the large-proboscised primitive)
DainBramaged
EFerrari (Doug's stupid ex-wife)
Fire_Walk_With_Me
grasswire
Horse With no Name (Ms Ed, the unappellated eohippus)
iverglas, the anti-gun nut
Judi Lynn (a Yugoista)
kentuck (the bluegrass primitive)
kpete (the kaput primitive)
mike_c
Mineral Man
nadinbrzezinski
Omaha Steve (Omaha's Ed Norton)
progressiveinaction
Proud2BLibKansan (Anne, the dysmenopausal Kansas school teacher)
Raven (the maternal ancestress of the Bostonian Drunkard)
Sarah Ibarruri
SidDithers
Skinner, EarlG, Elad (the Big Three)
Stinky the Clown (the sparkling husband dude)
The Magistrate
The Straight Story
ThomWV (the mountain man primitive)
Taverner
undergroundpanther (the subway cat)
Viva_Daddy
w8liftinglady
William Pitt (the Bostonian Drunkard)

Willie, for spreading around the good name and reputation of Skins's island:

the 9/11 forum on Skins's island
the Atheists' forum on Skins's island
the Israel/Palestinian forum on Skins's island
Alan Grayson (the disgraced ex-congressman)
Andy Stephenson (the late red round one)
cali (the bitter old Vermontese cali primitive)
California Peggy (the poetess laureate of Skins's island)
EFerrari (Doug's stupid ex-wife)
hippywife (Mrs. Alfred Packer)
nadinbrzezinski
ProudDad
Raven (the maternal ancestress of the Bostonian Drunkard)
Redstone (Chief S itting Bull, the bird-smacking stoned red-faced primitive)
Skinner, EarlG, Elad (the Big Three)
Spooked 911
Stinky the Clown (the sparkling husband dude)
The Magistrate

newbie, for an outstanding primitive who's never been in the top twenty:

farleftfist
Fire_Walk_With_Me
malaise (the malarial primitive)
MiddleFingerMom
snoutport
socialist_in_Tennessee
white_wolf

broken elbow, for the whiningest primitive:

Cyrano (Oscar Wilde, the large-proboscised primitive)
demjeepten (formerly the greenbriar primitive)
mopinko (the hypochondrial primitive)
nadinbrzezinski
Omaha Steve (Omaha's Ed Norton)
Stinky the Clown (the sparkling husband dude)
Sub Atomic
Taverner
TheStraightStory
ThomWV (the mountain man primitive)

golden bouncy, for the best bouncies:

11bravo
cali (the bitter old Vermontese cali primitive)
Dreamer Tatum
Firebrand Gary
Horse With no Name (Ms Ed, the unappellated eohippus)
nadinbrzezinski
Sarah Ibarruri
underground panther (the subway cat)
wiley50 (the worthless freeloading bum the wily primitive)

Since there seems some misunderstanding about the criteria for the Willie, the broken elbow, and the golden bouncy awards, it looks possible I may pare down those lists for the ballot.  The specific criteria for these awards, given at the beginning of this thread, will also appear on the Official Voting Thread.

[franksolich]

I hope Fox News carries the story and highlights his connection to DU.

Yes, and I wish the Taverner primitive would hurry up.

He's got until only late Saturday evening; time's wasting away.

[Tucker]

As I don't visit CU very much, does anyone know their leanings to the DOTY?

Much to my displeasure, it's pretty obvious as to who is running away with it here.

[Chris_]

Ralph Wiggum was pretty reliable about posting DOTY threads at CU.  I haven't seen him around, though.

[AprilRazz]

Looks like the sub atomic primitive is looking for the pizza. Attempting to go out in a flame of glory?
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,67093.msg0.html#new

Sub Atomic  (1000+ posts)      Tue Nov-29-11 03:37 AM
Original message
If Skinner's Crotchfruit turns out gay, would he allow it to be subjected to the same abuse?
Something tells me that the crotchfruit of the Admins would be supported in their fight for equality and protection from the assholes on this site.

[Ballygrl]

As I don't visit CU very much, does anyone know their leanings to the DOTY?

Much to my displeasure, it's pretty obvious as to who is running away with it here.

Yeah I know, I feel the same way.

[franksolich]

As I don't visit CU very much, does anyone know their leanings to the DOTY?

Much to my displeasure, it's pretty obvious as to who is running away with it here.

I just got done putting some posts over there.

I think they're leaning the same way the DUmpster is, but am not sure.

I'm really surprised; there doesn't seem that much familiarity with primitives in "the Best/Worst of DU" as there is here in the DUmpster.

[wasp69]

I had some unexpected free time this evening, so this update:

Since most of my nominees have already been nominated, I would like to add two names to the list for "The Willie":  Drug addict DUmbass Taverner since he is (in my opinion) everything a DUmbass strives to be (petulant, hateful, violent, habitual drug user, chronically unemployed, lazy, developmentally stunted, stoopid, and unable to  make it on his own); DUmbass uber-queer Sub Atomic for her/his/its mimicking of the Erinyes on the walls of Dis any time anyone dares speak the truth about faggotry and its corrosiveness  effects on civilized society.

These two mouth-breathers (and in at least one case a rope sucker) are the perfect images of what dickhead Dave Allen's Island of Misfit ****ups really represent.

[GOBUCKS]

He wants it badly, so I'll nominate the obnoxious queer DUmmy Sub Atomic for the newbie award. I haven't scanned all the nominations, so maybe he's already in there.

I don't much enjoy the queer threads, so maybe he's not a newbie, and I've just overlooked him.

[Kimberly]

I was poking around the archives for something I vaguely remember but can't find (grrrr) and found some interesting threads. So while you're considering your choices, here's some blasts from the past (year).

Sonoman discusses his illegal attempts to remain invisible. He was widely believed to be a TominTib sock.

Cali walldudes herself from her restaurant job.

Sarah Ibarruri and her freeper boyfriend.

Twix Voy and a grocery store bouncy that goes horribly wrong at the DUmp.

Grasswire sells pies to poor people and teachers get them for free.

Snoutport get beaten by one of his students.

I'm still considering most of my nominations, but I have decided to nominate PCIntern for the Golden Bong for his many dental bouncies. Well, back to searching the archives.

[Tucker]

I overlooked Snoutport.

He's a worthy candidate in all categories.

[GOBUCKS]

I was poking around the archives for something I vaguely remember but can't find (grrrr) and found some interesting threads. So while you're considering your choices, here's some blasts from the past (year).

Sonoman discusses his illegal attempts to remain invisible. He was widely believed to be a TominTib sock.

Cali walldudes herself from her restaurant job.

Sarah Ibarruri and her freeper boyfriend.

Twix Voy and a grocery store bouncy that goes horribly wrong at the DUmp.

Grasswire sells pies to poor people and teachers get them for free.

Snoutport get beaten by one of his students.

I'm still considering most of my nominations, but I have decided to nominate PCIntern for the Golden Bong for his many dental bouncies. Well, back to searching the archives.

Excellent post! Thanks!

I had forgotten Twix's brief reappearance, but that's a beauty. In fact, right now he's got my vote for the Golden Bong.

And, to me, the funniest post of 2011 came in the thread where DUmmy cali wallduded herself out of a job:

Taverner  (1000+ posts)        Mon Jul-25-11 01:26 PM
Response to Original message
36. What the heck happened?
Dude - can I help you find new work?

[Kimberly]

Here's some more. Enjoy!

Dreamer Tatum's marvelous bouncy.

CalPiggy buys Middlefingermom a laptop. I think this is before the gay slur meltdown.

Kpete: Weiner was stalked and set up by a Christian Infowar Militia cell.

Hannah Bell The commie got tombstoned.

Taverner studies for a drug test.

[GOBUCKS]

For the Broken Elbow, PCIntern, the medical building janitor started a short storyline about his life-threatening illness.

And DUmmy WCGreen, the corrupt democrat wardheeler from Cuyahoga County, with constant whining about his alleged lung transplant.

And the Las Vegas Lardass, with all his various skin eruptions, detailed digestive descriptions, and foot flipper difficulties.

[BattleHymn]

I'd like to nominate Larry R. Burks to the Top 20 list.  Larry's response to spooked911's thread Carl rowed over here today jogged my memory on this primitive.  I don't really know what to say about Larry, other than he is probably the most batshit person (in my opinion) at the Dump: 



http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,59097.0/highlight,larry+l+burks.html  Larry bottles gravity 


http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,58082.0/highlight,larry+l+burks.html  Larry's Isreali wormhole 


http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,59261.0/highlight,larry+l+burks.html  Flippydoo interviews nads and Larry   


http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,58779.0/highlight,larry+l+burks.html  Larry finds Osama on a U.S. nuclear submarine 


http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,58779.0/highlight,larry+l+burks.html  Larry:  Blind mice and black helicopters 

[whiffleball]

I need to toss another nomination for the Willie to lonestarnot of the 1000's of bodies in Texas trees..  She's been surging lately obviously vying for one of the titles.  Willie fits her best; she's one of the looniest of loons.

[micmac]

WILLIE - Cali for being stupid enough to post her place of employment and dissing the patrons of said establishment.  Her getting herself fired was the epitome of stupidity that reigns at the DUmp.

BROKEN ELBOW- Bobbolink for constantly reminding us she was homeless and living in her car

GOLDEN BONG - Twix Voy for the classic grocery store bouncy.  Classic, I tell you.  The "So's" flowed throughout the story with an elegance rarely seen at the DUmp.

NEWBIE - I would nominate my mole but I'm not done with it yet.   

[Karin]

I may add as the week goes on until I reach my 10.

First and foremost, Top Dummie is:  Taverner.  Hapless, helpless, idiotic, drug-addled, ridiculous.  Can't get or keep a job.  Thinks that Communism will solve all his particular problems, if only the rest of the country would go along with him.  All-around DUmbass.  Taverner, you've been my boy all year long; thanks for everything. 

Others in no order:

DainBramaged.  He is a 50-something male specimen who acts like a nine-year old girl.  Famously refers to dogs as "goggies." 

Sarah Ibarruri.  A mean, nasty bitch.  Has an annoying habit of weaving in "Repukes" in any sentence she forms. 

Grasswire, for the simple entertainment she provided in coming up against the barriers to entry in the business world.  Her sheer stupidity in overlooking the cold hard facts of insurance, health regulations, and the labyrinthine process of starting up any kind of entity.  Plus, the pie shown in the newspaper picture was laughably bad.  The publicly-stated plan of giving pies away for free to government employees was a classic.  She didn't even see anything fishy about that. 

Kentuck.  A simple man, he embodies that mouth-breathing DUmbness best; so I choose him to represent .

Newbies:  Snoutport for his hilarious, implausible stories.  Especially the injured bird, who was taken away on a stretcher by his bird-friends for R&R and healing. 
White Wolf to represent the Commies over there.  He's such a bastard prick; and I love it when someone smacks him around.

Most Whiney/Broken Elbow:  Sub-Atomic and Horse with No Name.  Horse constantly complains; there isn't a positive post within her. 

Bouncies:  Rsmith, as always.  He creates bouncies that inadvertently make him look like the world's biggest asshole.  His compliant wife always tags along. 

These are extraneous:

Honorable Mention goes to Stinky, only because I named one of my Hearts players after him (Taverner & DB are the others).  I enjoy handing off the Queen of Spades to Stinky, imagining his face reddening and his BP soaring. 

A special Season's Greetings & Merry Christmas to:

Obamanaut
Progressiveinaction
Dreamer Tatum
Codeine

[GOBUCKS]

I may add as the week goes on until I reach my 10.

First and foremost, Top Dummie is:  Taverner.  Hapless, helpless, idiotic, drug-addled, ridiculous.  Can't get or keep a job.  Thinks that Communism will solve all his particular problems, if only the rest of the country would go along with him.  All-around DUmbass.  Taverner, you've been my boy all year long; thanks for everything. 

Others in no order:

DainBramaged.  He is a 50-something male specimen who acts like a nine-year old girl.  Famously refers to dogs as "goggies." 

Sarah Ibarruri.  A mean, nasty bitch.  Has an annoying habit of weaving in "Repukes" in any sentence she forms. 

Grasswire, for the simple entertainment she provided in coming up against the barriers to entry in the business world.  Her sheer stupidity in overlooking the cold hard facts of insurance, health regulations, and the labyrinthine process of starting up any kind of entity.  Plus, the pie shown in the newspaper picture was laughably bad.  The publicly-stated plan of giving pies away for free to government employees was a classic.  She didn't even see anything fishy about that. 

Kentuck.  A simple man, he embodies that mouth-breathing DUmbness best; so I choose him to represent .

Newbies:  Snoutport for his hilarious, implausible stories.  Especially the injured bird, who was taken away on a stretcher by his bird-friends for R&R and healing. 
White Wolf to represent the Commies over there.  He's such a bastard prick; and I love it when someone smacks him around.

Most Whiney/Broken Elbow:  Sub-Atomic and Horse with No Name.  Horse constantly complains; there isn't a positive post within her. 

Bouncies:  Rsmith, as always.  He creates bouncies that inadvertently make him look like the world's biggest asshole.  His compliant wife always tags along. 

These are extraneous:

Honorable Mention goes to Stinky, only because I named one of my Hearts players after him (Taverner & DB are the others).  I enjoy handing off the Queen of Spades to Stinky, imagining his face reddening and his BP soaring. 

A special Season's Greetings & Merry Christmas to:

Obamanaut
Progressiveinaction
Dreamer Tatum
Codeine

Thank you, Karin! I had completely forgotten Snotspout's crippled bird bouncy.

He gets my vote for top bouncy of 2011, unless someone comes up with something mind-boggling between now and close of voting.

[franksolich]

This isn't a nomination yet, because I can't recall the exact primitive name.  demotex perhaps?

The primitive, allegedly a former military man, who couldn't identify aircraft and firearms correctly according to the experts here, who followed forest fires, and who whined to Skins after he mentioned us on Skins's island after we'd gotten dubious of his credentials, and his campfire got doused. 

[Tucker]

Snoutport's birdy bandages:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,62030.0.html

Demotex - Mr Ranger Sir:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,61395.0/highlight,fake+veteran.html

[franksolich]

Snoutport's birdy bandages:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,62030.0.html

Demotex - Mr Ranger Sir:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,61395.0/highlight,fake+veteran.html

Thank you, sir; I'm now nominating DemoTex for top primitive.

He has some bouncies that apparently are incredible, but I dunno nothing about military aircraft and firearms, so if he deserves the golden bouncy, perhaps an expert on those matters can nominate him.