Coach's mole, the holy grail of DUmmitude.
They search, and seach, only to fail.
Again. 
You know, sir, I long ago figured out the secret to the success of my mole (actually I have a spare one too, but it's laying fallow at the moment).
My mole doesn't cause any problems on Skins's island, adhering rigorously to the party-line.
My mole's a 100%er on Skins's island.
Of course, my mole doesn't exist to disrupt; it's for anthropological research, collecting data through personal messages on Skins's island, and only the sender/receiver know what's in a personal message. It's not anything the other primitives can delve into.
When making public comments, my mole stays as far away as possible from primitives mentioned in the DUmpster; I deal with only the
lumpenprimitiven, the
unterprimitiven, the anonymouses who never get mentioned here. And that's 99% of the primitives.
Primitives mentioned here, my mole avoids like the plague on Skins's island; if possible, it tries to stay at least a football field's length away from any of them.
I/m sure my fellow alum Skins and the elusive enigmatic Elad know the identity of my mole (Lord Marblehead EarlG wouldn't find it even with a road map), but because I don't cause them any problems, they leave my mole alone.