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Author Topic: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)  (Read 2974 times)

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Offline BattleHymn

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10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« on: August 23, 2011, 09:58:22 PM »
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x9764897

My beef with DUmmie Taverner isn't so much in his list (although I will give you a hint, looking for a job is not in his top ten), but with him calling himself "unemployed".  Being unemployed happens.  Being chronically unemployed should have a different name altogether:

Quote
Taverner   (1000+ posts)             Tue Aug-23-11 12:46 PM
Original message
10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored
   

 
10 - Call your former place of work and ask for "Harry Butts"

9 - Finally watch the endless, red-herring, middle episodes of "Lost" between the time you stopped watching and the final episode.

8 - Learn to play the Sitar - IT ONLY HAS ONE STRING!!!!

7 - Discover an ancient ruin on Google Earth

6 - Count the number of times a specific DUers says 'well.' Send them several PMs informing them of this.

5 - Go find that Prostate gland/G Spot

4 - Put your finger on it

3 - Discover how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie roll

2 - Dress your dog up in S&M wear. Take pictures. Post on DU.

1 - Beat your head hopelessly against wall. Take aspirin.

Quote
oneshooter (1000+ posts)           Tue Aug-23-11 07:08 PM
Response to Original message
6. My list #1-#10 Find a JOB. Finding a good job is a full time job itself. n/t

Freeper!  Mole!

Quote
Taverner   (1000+ posts)             Tue Aug-23-11 07:11 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. Yes, but unfortunately you can't do this 100% of the time
   
Hence, the rub...

Taverner telling us that he is still working on #5 on his list.

Quote
Taverner   (1000+ posts)             Tue Aug-23-11 09:20 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. That would be nice if I were someone who had a clue...
   
But unlike J.K. Rowling, I do not...

All kudos to her, who did...

But I am a lost soul...

Here's a clue:  you won't find anyone else with a clue at the DUmp. 


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Offline compaqxp

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #1 on: August 23, 2011, 11:08:49 PM »
But of course the list doesn't include trying to find a job...

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Beat your head hopelessly against wall. Take aspirin Smoke Pot.
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Offline JakeStyle

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #2 on: August 23, 2011, 11:20:23 PM »
Quote
5 - Go find that Prostate gland/G Spot

4 - Put your finger on it

What a twisted sick freak this guys is, wow.
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Offline Evil_Conservative

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #3 on: August 23, 2011, 11:58:02 PM »
Quote
10 - Call your former place of work and ask for "Harry Butts"

That's very mature.  I see management in your future.
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Offline Firechild

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #4 on: August 24, 2011, 02:48:16 AM »
With a mind like that, no wonder they lost their job. 
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Offline Karin

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #5 on: August 24, 2011, 07:47:47 AM »
Um, yeah.  4 & 5 kinda shocked me.  What a weirdo!  Truly a creepy guy. 

Here's what Chan790 has to say:

Quote
I'm awesome...another interview tomorrow and this one pays more than the last. Not one interview thus far has been for a job paying less than twice the bank. That was truly the best thing that ever happened to me.

Sure.   :whatever:
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Offline diesel driver

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #6 on: August 24, 2011, 07:51:10 AM »
Quote from: Karin on August 24, 2011, 07:47:47 AM
Um, yeah.  4 & 5 kinda shocked me.  What a weirdo!  Truly a creepy guy.  


I wonder if or what he used for "lube" for his prostate "self-exam".   :lmao:

On second thought, no I don't.  :puke:
  
« Last Edit: August 24, 2011, 08:04:17 AM by diesel driver »
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Offline Maxiest

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #7 on: August 24, 2011, 08:09:48 AM »
Quote from: diesel driver on August 24, 2011, 07:51:10 AM
I wonder if or what he used for "lube" for his prostate "self-exam".   :lmao:

On second thought, no I don't.  :puke:
  

Probably didn't need to, I am sure enough things have been stuck in there it isn't that tight anymore.
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Offline diesel driver

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #8 on: August 24, 2011, 08:10:46 AM »
Quote from: Maxiest on August 24, 2011, 08:09:48 AM
Probably didn't need to, I am sure enough things have been stuck in there it isn't that tight anymore.

             :lol:
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Murphy's 3rd Law:  "You can't make anything 'idiot DUmmie proof'.  The world will just create a better idiot DUmmie."

Liberals are like Slinkys.  Basically useless, but they do bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs...
 
Global warming supporters believe that a few hundred million tons of CO2 has more control over our climate than a million mile in diameter, unshielded thermo-nuclear fusion reactor at the middle of the solar system.

"A dead enemy is a peaceful enemy.  Blessed be the peacemakers". - U.S. Marine Corp

You can't fix stupid, but you can vote it out of office.

Offline Ballygrl

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #9 on: August 24, 2011, 08:16:50 AM »
Quote
1 - Beat your head hopelessly against wall. Take aspirin.

Not good advice, someone could get a hemorrhage from hitting their head, taking an aspirin is a no no because it thins the blood.
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Offline Ralph Wiggum

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #10 on: August 24, 2011, 08:28:44 AM »
Quote
oneshooter (1000+ posts)           Tue Aug-23-11 07:08 PM
Response to Original message
6. My list #1-#10 Find a JOB. Finding a good job is a full time job itself. n/t

Advice that stupid Taverner surely won't take.

The few times I've been out of work, I treated the job search as a full-time job.  No sleeping in until noon, watching crap TV.  Get your butt out of bed and make phone calls and apply for jobs.  Talk to recruiters on a daily or semi-daily basis.  That's their job, to help you find work.  That's how they make money.
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Offline Aristotelian

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #11 on: August 24, 2011, 08:32:53 AM »
Quote from: Ralph Wiggum on August 24, 2011, 08:28:44 AM
Advice that stupid Taverner surely won't take.

The few times I've been out of work, I treated the job search as a full-time job.  No sleeping in until noon, watching crap TV.  Get your butt out of bed and make phone calls and apply for jobs.  Talk to recruiters on a daily or semi-daily basis.  That's their job, to help you find work.  That's how they make money.

The problem is that's how Taverner would treat a full-time job.
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Offline BEG

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #12 on: August 24, 2011, 08:39:40 AM »
Quote from: Ralph Wiggum on August 24, 2011, 08:28:44 AM
Advice that stupid Taverner surely won't take.

The few times I've been out of work, I treated the job search as a full-time job.  No sleeping in until noon, watching crap TV.  Get your butt out of bed and make phone calls and apply for jobs.  Talk to recruiters on a daily or semi-daily basis.  That's their job, to help you find work.  That's how they make money.

His job pool probably doesn't require a recruiter Ralph.
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Offline Airwolf

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #13 on: August 24, 2011, 08:47:02 AM »
Notice he didn't say "Stay online all day and irratate the living shit out of people online ".
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Offline Ralph Wiggum

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #14 on: August 24, 2011, 08:55:04 AM »
Quote from: BEG on August 24, 2011, 08:39:40 AM
His job pool probably doesn't require a recruiter Ralph.

I know, BEG.  I just assume the best in people, and in this case I forgot I was talking about a DUmmy. :thatsright:
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #15 on: August 24, 2011, 11:26:02 AM »
DUmmy Taverner's list of daily activities describes exactly why we refer to the DUmp as a monkeyhouse.
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Offline Rufus2010

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #16 on: August 24, 2011, 01:37:22 PM »
Buy stock in Cheetos?
Make pot brownies?
« Last Edit: August 24, 2011, 01:40:08 PM by Rufus2010 »
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Offline Firechild

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #17 on: August 24, 2011, 02:30:27 PM »
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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #18 on: August 24, 2011, 03:11:39 PM »
Quote from: Ballygrl on August 24, 2011, 08:16:50 AM
Not good advice, someone could get a hemorrhage from hitting their head, taking an aspirin is a no no because it thins the blood.

Bally, we want Taverner to do this. :thatsright:
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Offline I_B_Perky

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #19 on: August 24, 2011, 03:27:49 PM »
Quote from: Karin on August 24, 2011, 07:47:47 AM
Um, yeah.  4 & 5 kinda shocked me.  What a weirdo!  Truly a creepy guy. 

Here's what Chan790 has to say:
Quote
I'm awesome...another interview tomorrow and this one pays more than the last. Not one interview thus far has been for a job paying less than twice the bank. That was truly the best thing that ever happened to me.
Sure.   :whatever:

Well when you were only working 20 hrs a week for min wage, any full time min wage job will pay twice as much.   :-)
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Offline Freeper

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #20 on: August 24, 2011, 06:58:26 PM »
Here are 2 things to do to no longer be unemployed,

1 Stop smoking dope so you can pass a drug test.
2 Bathe.

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Offline dutch508

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #21 on: August 24, 2011, 11:37:59 PM »
Hum. I am not even out of my old job yet and i got offered a position at the local school. Heck, i haven't met the principal yet, and got offered the position.
Just closed on the house. No problem getting a loan, either.

Maybe i just don't get the nuances of the DUmpmonkies perilous life.
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Offline Karin

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #22 on: August 25, 2011, 09:51:40 AM »
Congrats on all that, dutch!   :cheersmate:
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Offline Paul Heinzman

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Re: 10 Things to do when you're unemployed and bored (Taverner)
« Reply #23 on: August 25, 2011, 05:46:46 PM »
Quote
5 - Go find that Prostate gland/G Spot

4 - Put your finger on it

3 - Discover how many licks it takes...

It was all I could do not to look away at this point.
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