Sir, if I'm correct, you used to work in retail, or perhaps you still do.
I'll bet you can tell some whales of stories, and wish you would.
I don't work retail anymore, not since 2008, but working overnights was a trip. Nothing really spectacular happened, I live in a small town of about 8,500, but even then, the "freakshow" usually started around 2 AM.
Women with drunk spouses/boyfriends/whatevers coming thru the line with 4 screaming kids, all of them in pajamas, trying to buy alcohol (can't in Virginia from midnight to 6AM), cussing me out because the register won't allow the sale.
EBT "customers" lining up outside the checkout lanes 15 minutes before midnight on the first of the month. Having half of them "hold their place" in line while they went back to get beer before 12:00, then it was the other half's turn.
Ringing up the purchases of a Chinese couple, who were buying products and produce for their restaurant across the street. Ditto for the guy who ran a convenience store in a neighboring town.
Had a customer try to goad me into a political discussion by commenting "Carter was the greatest president this country ever had!" I didn't bite. I merely nodded politely and smiled.
Had another customer tell me he was voting for Obama, not "Burns and Allen." I told him I'd rather have them than "Buffalo Joe and Howdy Doody." He commented I was the first conservative he had met that could hold his own against him, as well as his temper. He knew I was a conservative when he showed me the pistol he had concealed under his jacket, and I didn't blink, scream, flinch, or report him to management.
Had a truck driver come in the store wearing a black turbin. We referred to him as "Osama Bin Trucking".
Wednesday mornings at around 2 AM, the factory workers at a truck trailer manufacturing plant would come in to cash their paychecks. At times, I had "borrowed" over $5,000 from the cash office, the most was $7,500 in a 3 hour period.
Was never more than 10 cents over/under with my cash drawer audits.
I'm sure I could come up with some more.