There is a tour bus company that I see all the time at one area, because I am sure they are making money hand and fist off of the primitive-types, since their total trip time stop has yet to be over 15 minutes:
Get off of said tour bus, fanny pack brimming with who knows what, sporting a golf hat, wearing low-tread tennis shoes/birkenstocks, and proudly carrying around a locally-sourced Ozarka spring water (that the tour bus company picked up in bulk at Sam's Club).
One big snake, tick, and mosquito-infested rock encrusted hill later, and they are all back on the bus.
So much for your rustic hike through the Ozarks. Next time, try Sequiota Park, inside the city.