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Offline franksolich

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primitive becomes a truck driver
« on: March 31, 2011, 07:56:28 PM »
http://upload.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x9655417

Oh my.

An employed primitive.

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cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 02:05 AM
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Home after 28 days... Damn it feels good.

What a longggg strange trip it's been.

My 28 day "training" trip as a newbie trucker finally came to an end Monday. In 21 days of being on the road (we sat for a few days here and there) my truck covered over 18,000 miles. Two things stand out as things I'll never forget...

I was on I-8 just after crossing over the river into Arizona from California when I came to a construction zone at about 3 a.m. and got behind two other trucks. It was just us three and the construction zone seemed to go on forever. Speed limit 35mph. After a while, I started to get drowsy just from going slow, and decided to turn on the CB radio to see if I could hear anything. Not more than ten seconds after I turned it on, this is what I heard:

"That's the LAST mother ****ing time I'm going to ask you to turn your high beams off you stupid asshole"

I thought to myself wow, that guy is really pissed off at someone... then I looked down at the dashboard and realized he was talking to ME. Casually (as IF anyone was looking) I reached down and turned the high beams off. Instantly here's what came over the radio:

"It's about TIME you stupid mother ****in' son of a bitch".

Well okay, at that point, I thought this guy had gone too far. I made a simple mistake, and had I had the radio on sooner, I'd have heard his requests. He kept going on about rookie truckers though and finally I had enough. I grabbed the mike and said:

Me: "Hey, I heard o' you, you're one o' them SUPER TRUCKERS, ain't ya? (just about the worst thing you can call an old-school trucker is a Super Trucker) I've heard you Super Truckers don't even know what a mistake IS, much less how to make one."

At this point, the trucker in between us keyed up his mike and went "hahahahahahahahaha"...

Super Trucker started telling me I had better watch my mouth or risk an ass whoopin'.

"I bet you think a miss-take is a female T-bone, dontcha?"

"hahahahahahahahahaha"

Him: "I'll park this trailer across the road and kick you AND your co-driver's asses"

Me: "Pardner, if you put that pretty new reefer across the road, I'll drive this rig right thoo the middle of it"

"hahahahahahahahaha"

Him: "Awww, **** Y'ALL and with that, he stood on the fast pedal, and was gone in a few heartbeats.

The other happened one morning in Tallulah, LA at a Love's truck stop. I was checking the oil while my lead driver was taking a shower. I don't know how many of you have ever actually seen a dipstick, but they're normally a flat piece of pretty rigid metal with a pointy end and a scale. The Freightliner I was driving has a dipstick that's actually a spring, with the flat piece attached at the end.

This ol' boy prolly about 65 years old sees me checking the oil and comes over to my truck... Imagine if you will the deepest thickest southern accent coming from a guy in coveralls and a baseball cap whose bill is bent nearly in half...

Him: "The HAY'LL kinda dipstick izzat?
Me: Well, it's the kind o dipstick truckers use to check the erl in their drivin' motors.
Him: Kinda limp, ain't it?
Me: Well... it's made o spring, so it'll spring back any time an ol' boy needs it to.
He laughs, claps me on the shoulder and says... Well, aight then, and walks away.

I drove a 53' trailer with only 10,000lbs in it between Laramie and Cheyenne with icy roads and 45mph gusts in the middle of the night, scared SHITLESS.

I drove that same trailer with 42,000lbs over I-5 from Oregon to CA with chains on in a snowstorm that had visibility down to about 50ft, scared SHITLESS.

In short, I had a blast.

Been home for two days. HoneyDo's are almost done and boy oh boy is it nice to be held tight from the time I go to sleep to the time I wake up. It just wasn't the same laying with my co-driver (he snores too loud and won't rub me like I like plus the two of us combined are too big for the small bunk in a Freightliner).

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cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 02:47 AM
Response to Reply #1
 
2. It's so good to be home! I'll be out on the road within the next few days though...

From here on out it'll be 20 days out, 10 at home.

To me that's like having a 10 day vacation after every three weeks at work.

We can live with that.

I've met some interesting people on the road though, I have to tell ya.

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cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 02:36 PM
Response to Reply #3
 
7. I have never had problems sleeping. I slept like a baby on the aircraft carrier with an ordnance elevator on the other side of the bulkhead that was in use 24/7. I had trouble at first in the truck because of the bouncy nature of it, but after about three days I was getting bounced off the mattress and still sleeping soundly.

You won't hardly notice your co-driver if you drive team, he/she'll be driving while you're sleeping unless you're stopped for some reason.

No pictures to speak of yet, forgot the camera at home. I'll post some when I get 'em.

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cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 07:28 PM
Response to Reply #8
 
15. I wanted to stop. My lead driver said no.

The speed was limited to 35 mph which I think contributed to my trailer sliding around so much. If it had gotten to close to the edge of the road and lost the crown I would have been a statistic.

In the end, I'm told it would have been MY decision to park the truck since the other driver was on his 10 hour break, but being a totally new driver I went with what the lead said, against my better judgement. The last truck stop before that stretch of I-80 had trucks lined up from the beginning of the offramp to the end of the onramp and there must have been 500 trucks in the truck stop proper.

Quote
cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 08:46 PM
Response to Reply #16
 
17. I wonder how people would drive if they knew semis take 600 feet to stop from 60mph...

I hate it when a four-wheeler's first instinct is to speed up and try to get past me when I put my left turn signal on. They don't even KNOW what's on my right side causing me to move over, or if whatever it is is FORCING me to move.

I'm going to have T-shirts made for sale in truck stops and I bet they sell bigtime.

Front: My turn signal IS NOT a request.

Back: It's a statement.

Hell I'd even like to put that on the back of my trailer.

Well, it's good to see it's working out, a primitive with a job.
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Offline true_blood

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2011, 08:01:41 PM »
Quote
cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 08:46 PM
Response to Reply #16
 17. I wonder how people would drive if they knew semis take 600 feet to stop from 60mph...
I hate it when a four-wheeler's first instinct is to speed up and try to get past me when I put my left turn signal on. They don't even KNOW what's on my right side causing me to move over, or if whatever it is is FORCING me to move. I'm going to have T-shirts made for sale in truck stops and I bet they sell bigtime.
I thought you primitives hated "capitalism"?!?
 :mental: :mental:
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Offline Chris_

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #2 on: March 31, 2011, 08:05:07 PM »
What do t-shirts have to do with a turn signal?

Dumb noob... truck stops are tourist traps.  You can try to sell your t-shirt there, but you'll probably just get laughed at.  Been on the job for less than a month and he's already calling them four-wheelers.
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Offline franksolich

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #3 on: March 31, 2011, 08:07:20 PM »
You know, I've always been curious about something.

At least here in Nebraska, truck-trailers always have the notation "53'" painted near their end, designating that the trailer's 53 feet long.

Is there a particular reason truck trailers are 53 feet long?
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Offline Chris_

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #4 on: March 31, 2011, 08:16:21 PM »
Seems to be a national standard that developed over time from trains and military use.  It's also the length of a standard international shipping container. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intermodal_container
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Offline franksolich

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #5 on: March 31, 2011, 08:20:07 PM »
Quote from: chris_ on March 31, 2011, 08:16:21 PM
Seems to be a national standard that developed over time from trains and military use.  It's also the length of a standard international shipping container. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intermodal_container

Thanks, sir.

But how did you figure out to wikipedia "intermodal container"?

That term would've never occurred to me.
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Milo Yiannopoulos "It has been obvious since 2016 that Trump carries an anointing of some kind. My American friends, are you so blind to reason, and deaf to Heaven? Can he do all this, and cannot get a crown? This man is your King. Coronate him, and watch every devil shriek, and every demon howl."

Offline Chris_

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #6 on: March 31, 2011, 08:27:50 PM »
I typed "the origin of the 53 foot trailer" into Google.  It was the second link.
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Offline LC EFA

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #7 on: March 31, 2011, 08:32:03 PM »
Jackass who is too much of an inconsiderate asshole to turn down his high-beams when trailing close or for approaching traffic (on 2-lane roads) and doesn't have the 2-way radio on ?

Who is then chastised so harshly by the other road users that he has to create a bouncy tale and post it on DU to cover up how butt-hurt and tear stained he is.

Whoever or whatever means by which he came about the license to operate a heavy vehicle need to be curtailed immediately and this inconsiderate sack of sphincter scrapings should never be allowed near a road, let alone a motorized vehicle ever again in his life.



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Offline franksolich

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #8 on: March 31, 2011, 08:33:59 PM »
Quote from: chris_ on March 31, 2011, 08:27:50 PM
I typed "the origin of the 53 foot trailer" into Google.  It was the second link.

Oh.
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Milo Yiannopoulos "It has been obvious since 2016 that Trump carries an anointing of some kind. My American friends, are you so blind to reason, and deaf to Heaven? Can he do all this, and cannot get a crown? This man is your King. Coronate him, and watch every devil shriek, and every demon howl."

Offline Vagabond

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #9 on: March 31, 2011, 08:38:15 PM »
I heard a conversation north bound on I-10 towards Phoenix back in '97.

Trucker 1: Where are the women at?
Trucker 2: Home, last I checked.  Where's yours?
Trucker 1: Nah, I mean which place has the women.
Trucker 2: Why?
Trucker 1: I been on the road ten days, and I need some relief.
Trucker 2: Well'n, I don' know what ta tell ya if yer hand ain't enough!  

Trucker 1 went dead silent while we still in range.

Me and a friend had a good laugh at the whole exchange.
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Offline Vagabond

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #10 on: March 31, 2011, 08:39:47 PM »
Quote from: franksolich on March 31, 2011, 08:07:20 PM
You know, I've always been curious about something.

At least here in Nebraska, truck-trailers always have the notation "53'" painted near their end, designating that the trailer's 53 feet long.

Is there a particular reason truck trailers are 53 feet long?

Not all are.  My company contracts 70 foot flat bebs to move some of our equipment.
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Offline franksolich

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #11 on: March 31, 2011, 08:43:23 PM »
Quote from: Vagabond on March 31, 2011, 08:39:47 PM
Not all are.  My company contracts 70 foot flat bebs to move some of our equipment.

It must depend on the state.

In Nebraska, perhaps 53' is the state maximum that is allowed?

Some years ago, we allowed double trailers (but NOT each of them 53' long), but apparently no more.
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Milo Yiannopoulos "It has been obvious since 2016 that Trump carries an anointing of some kind. My American friends, are you so blind to reason, and deaf to Heaven? Can he do all this, and cannot get a crown? This man is your King. Coronate him, and watch every devil shriek, and every demon howl."

Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #12 on: March 31, 2011, 08:49:26 PM »
Quote from: chris_ on March 31, 2011, 08:27:50 PM
I typed "the origin of the 53 foot trailer" into Google.  It was the second link.
I think we have someone fully qualified to replace DUmmy nadinbrzhhzhzhski! Thank goodness!
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Offline longview

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #13 on: March 31, 2011, 08:58:38 PM »
Good for him (in spite of his new "trucker" lingo).  Always happy to see someone work if they can.
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Offline franksolich

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #14 on: March 31, 2011, 08:59:19 PM »
Quote from: longview on March 31, 2011, 08:58:38 PM
Good for him (in spite of his new "trucker" lingo).  Always happy to see someone work if they can.

Oh, absolutely.

And a primitive NOT on the public dole.
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Milo Yiannopoulos "It has been obvious since 2016 that Trump carries an anointing of some kind. My American friends, are you so blind to reason, and deaf to Heaven? Can he do all this, and cannot get a crown? This man is your King. Coronate him, and watch every devil shriek, and every demon howl."

Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #15 on: March 31, 2011, 09:12:21 PM »
This won't last. Driving is truck is a hard job. DUmmies don't last in hard jobs.

Which reminds me. DUmmy TwixVoy, fresh off the failure of his plan to emigrate to Portugal and sponge off his kid, reported getting a new job far below his station. Then, nothing. I wonder if DUmmy Twix is celebrating two weeks on the new shitty job, or if he's newly re-unemployed.
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Offline franksolich

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #16 on: March 31, 2011, 09:14:23 PM »
Quote from: GOBUCKS on March 31, 2011, 09:12:21 PM
Which reminds me. DUmmy TwixVoy, fresh off the failure of his plan to emigrate to Portugal and sponge off his kid, reported getting a new job far below his station. Then, nothing. I wonder if DUmmy Twix is celebrating two weeks on the new shitty job, or if he's newly re-unemployed.

I'll take "newly re-unemployed."

It didn't seem as if he got off to an, uh, auspicious start.
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Milo Yiannopoulos "It has been obvious since 2016 that Trump carries an anointing of some kind. My American friends, are you so blind to reason, and deaf to Heaven? Can he do all this, and cannot get a crown? This man is your King. Coronate him, and watch every devil shriek, and every demon howl."

Offline Ree

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #17 on: April 01, 2011, 12:23:54 AM »
Bet the  dude is a Big R driver. They hire anyone
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Offline JakeStyle

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #18 on: April 01, 2011, 03:25:02 AM »
Quote from: Ree on April 01, 2011, 12:23:54 AM
Bet the  dude is a Big R driver. They hire anyone
I was going to guess CRST, they also will hire anyone.
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Offline compaqxp

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #19 on: April 01, 2011, 03:57:54 AM »
Quote from: chris_ on March 31, 2011, 08:05:07 PM
What do t-shirts have to do with a turn signal?

T-shirts are more frequently used by most people? Other then that I'm not sure.
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Offline catsmtrods

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #20 on: April 01, 2011, 04:14:11 AM »
A. Dewiepyle?
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #21 on: April 01, 2011, 05:14:43 AM »
Frank, 65 feet is the maximum length of truck and trailer you can run without a special permit set by federal standards....and 53 feet of trailer is about maximum length you can pull and then add the truck cab in front of it.

Have you seen those trailers with an axle about midpoint? Those probably run thru or out of Illinois. They used to have a crazy bridge formula for weight distribution. Every state has different laws governing truck weights and measurements and then you have federal rules/regs. It's enough to drive a fellow crazy.

Tags, insurance, property taxes, permits, federal road use taxes and then all the record keeping and reporting of mileage of fuel use etc....I sold my truck and lowboy trailer. It was much easier and less stressful for me to hire someone specializing in moving "super loads" to move my heavy equipment.

About those bright lights... :rotf:...DUmmie should have been around a few years back. There was a trucking company here in the Carolina's that guaranteed delivery anywhere on the west coast in 54 hours....and that was with a single driver. Owner of said company ran some first class trucks/trailers and when his drivers complained of people following them with bright lights, he solved the problem. He had all the back doors on his trailers replaced with chrome or highly polished stainless steel/aluminum. Drivers were already instructed to keep their trucks clean at all times so there was no problem keeping them bright and shiny. Nobody but nobody could get close to the back of one of his trucks with their bright lights on... :lmao:

 
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Offline PatriotGame

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #22 on: April 01, 2011, 07:25:08 AM »
Quote
cherokeeprogressive  (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-31-11 02:05 AM
Original message

Home after 28 days... Damn it feels good.

What a longggg strange trip it's been.

My 28 day "training" trip as a newbie trucker finally came to an end Monday. In 21 days of being on the road (we sat for a few days here and there) my truck covered over 18,000 miles. Two things stand out as things I'll never forget...

I was on I-8 just after crossing over the river into Arizona from California when I came to a construction zone at about 3 a.m. and got behind two other trucks. It was just us three and the construction zone seemed to go on forever. Speed limit 35mph. After a while, I started to get drowsy just from going slow, and decided to turn on the CB radio to see if I could hear anything. Not more than ten seconds after I turned it on, this is what I heard:

"That's the LAST mother ****ing time I'm going to ask you to turn your high beams off you stupid asshole"

I thought to myself wow, that guy is really pissed off at someone... then I looked down at the dashboard and realized he was talking to ME. Casually (as IF anyone was looking) I reached down and turned the high beams off. Instantly here's what came over the radio:

"It's about TIME you stupid mother ****in' son of a bitch".

Well okay, at that point, I thought this guy had gone too far. I made a simple mistake, and had I had the radio on sooner, I'd have heard his requests. He kept going on about rookie truckers though and finally I had enough. I grabbed the mike and said:

Me: "Hey, I heard o' you, you're one o' them SUPER TRUCKERS, ain't ya? (just about the worst thing you can call an old-school trucker is a Super Trucker) I've heard you Super Truckers don't even know what a mistake IS, much less how to make one."

At this point, the trucker in between us keyed up his mike and went "hahahahahahahahaha"...

Super Trucker started telling me I had better watch my mouth or risk an ass whoopin'.

"I bet you think a miss-take is a female T-bone, dontcha?"

"hahahahahahahahahaha"

Him: "I'll park this trailer across the road and kick you AND your co-driver's asses"

Me: "Pardner, if you put that pretty new reefer across the road, I'll drive this rig right thoo the middle of it"

"hahahahahahahahaha"

Him: "Awww, **** Y'ALL and with that, he stood on the fast pedal, and was gone in a few heartbeats.

The other happened one morning in Tallulah, LA at a Love's truck stop. I was checking the oil while my lead driver was taking a shower. I don't know how many of you have ever actually seen a dipstick, but they're normally a flat piece of pretty rigid metal with a pointy end and a scale. The Freightliner I was driving has a dipstick that's actually a spring, with the flat piece attached at the end.

This ol' boy prolly about 65 years old sees me checking the oil and comes over to my truck... Imagine if you will the deepest thickest southern accent coming from a guy in coveralls and a baseball cap whose bill is bent nearly in half...

Him: "The HAY'LL kinda dipstick izzat?
Me: Well, it's the kind o dipstick truckers use to check the erl in their drivin' motors.
Him: Kinda limp, ain't it?
Me: Well... it's made o spring, so it'll spring back any time an ol' boy needs it to.
He laughs, claps me on the shoulder and says... Well, aight then, and walks away.

I drove a 53' trailer with only 10,000lbs in it between Laramie and Cheyenne with icy roads and 45mph gusts in the middle of the night, scared SHITLESS.

I drove that same trailer with 42,000lbs over I-5 from Oregon to CA with chains on in a snowstorm that had visibility down to about 50ft, scared SHITLESS.

In short, I had a blast.

Been home for two days. HoneyDo's are almost done and boy oh boy is it nice to be held tight from the time I go to sleep to the time I wake up. It just wasn't the same laying with my co-driver (he snores too loud and won't rub me like I like plus the two of us combined are too big for the small bunk in a Freightliner).

Wow!!!111


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Offline PatriotGame

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #23 on: April 01, 2011, 07:31:34 AM »
Quote from: franksolich on March 31, 2011, 08:07:20 PM
You know, I've always been curious about something.

At least here in Nebraska, truck-trailers always have the notation "53'" painted near their end, designating that the trailer's 53 feet long.

Is there a particular reason truck trailers are 53 feet long?
VRWC secrets are just that...4 quarts to a gallon...2 cups to a pint...2.2 acres in a hector...shhh...just between u & me...
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Offline PatriotGame

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Re: primitive becomes a truck driver
« Reply #24 on: April 01, 2011, 07:37:02 AM »
Quote from: Vagabond on March 31, 2011, 08:38:15 PM
I heard a conversation north bound on I-10 towards Phoenix back in '97.

Trucker 1: Where are the women at?

For the DUmmy:

Me:  "With me! Suck on it long and hard douche-bag!"
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