poll: do we drive the primitives nuts?

[franksolich]

Okay, it's a little past time for the quarterly poll about the effectiveness of the DUmpster, when it comes to fulfilling its mission.

The mission of the DUmpster is, as usual: (a) to entertain and amuse decent and civilized people, (b) as "quality control," to see if the primitives are as good as they allege themselves to be, (c) as oppositional research, and (d) as anthropological illumination.

Myself, I'm into the anthropological part; observing the customs, traditions, rituals, ceremonies, taboos, totems, superstitions, dances, festivals, hierarchies, castes, of the primitives on Skins's island.

Most here are simply here for light diversion and amusement, such as that most recently provided by the Nadine primitive.

Some here take this "oppositional research" stuff seriously, even though the primitives are only about 3,000 in numbers, and can scarcely be accused of reflecting popular and prevalent perceptions and values, and have zero, zilch, nada, nil influence on the other political party.

Others prefer the "quality control" aspect; checking to be sure the primitives are what they say they are (in the entire recorded history of Skins's island--going back ten years, remember--the answer has been, inevitably, "no").

But when either simply laughing at the primitives, or seriously studying the primitives, does the DUmpster drive the primitives nuts?

[thundley4]

Nuts?  That's a short drive for all of them.    However, it seems that when we focus on a prolifically stooooopid DUmmie, they tend to not post as many original threads.  Stinky doesn't start many anymore, and nadinletters has curtailed her output.

[Duke Nukum]

I don't know.  I tend to think they started out that way.

[franksolich]

However, it seems that when we focus on a prolifically stooooopid DUmmie, they tend to not post as many original threads.  Stinky doesn't start many anymore, and nadinletters has curtailed her output.

You know, that does bother me.

The primitives always entertain fantasies about being on center stage.

So.....the DUmpster puts them up on center stage, makes them into stars, promotes them, boosts them, publicizes them, advertises them, and then the primitives suddenly get stage fright.

I dunno what's up with that.

[thundley4]

You know, that does bother me.

The primitives always entertain fantasies about being on center stage.

So.....the DUmpster puts them up on center stage, makes them into stars, promotes them, boosts them, publicizes them, advertises them, and then the primitives suddenly get stage fright.

I dunno what's up with that.

Maybe they just burnout what few brain cells they have left.

[franksolich]

Maybe they just burnout what few brain cells they have left.

You know, sir, unlike Hollywood and the mainstream news media, we don't make the primitives out to be something they aren't. 

As far as I know, the DUmpster has never misrepresented a primitive.

It's hard to misrepresent someone whose own words are accurately quoted.

I dunno why the primitives resent that, being accurately quoted.

[AllosaursRus]

Know of any other site where you can be trounced just for posting the name of another web site?

I rest my case!

[Mr Mannn]

Nuts?  That's a short drive for all of them. 

Hi five

[GOBUCKS]

You know, that does bother me.

The primitives always entertain fantasies about being on center stage.

So.....the DUmpster puts them up on center stage, makes them into stars, promotes them, boosts them, publicizes them, advertises them, and then the primitives suddenly get stage fright.

I dunno what's up with that.

DUmmy husb2Sparkly and the know-it-all DUmmy are just the most recent examples, though the know-it-all's arrogance appears to be limitless, and she may return in force. Some of the all-time DUmp stars dried up and blew away shortly after winning center stage. How about DUmmy TwixVoy? Or TruthIsAll? Top DUmbass Pam Dawson disappeared as soon as she hit the big time. TiTtyboy went completely nuts and got banned (the most outrageous injustice in DUmp history). ThomWV has nearly disappeared. Only rarely do we hear the rattle of his human-tooth necklace. DUmmies atman and Redstone have become rare posters, due, I think to their fear of the wrath of the coach. The Las Vegas whale has become nearly extinct, since his tragic cyberbullying. How about coach's protege (can't remember his name), the nutcase who wrote the worst science fiction in the history of the world? All gone, or virtually gone, as soon as the spotlight fell upon them. Sort of like roaches. 

[franksolich]

DUmmy husb2Sparkly and the know-it-all DUmmy are just the most recent examples, though the know-it-all's arrogance appears to be limitless, and she may return in force.

Some of the all-time DUmp stars dried up and blew away shortly after winning center stage. How about DUmmy TwixVoy? Or TruthIsAll? Top DUmbass Pam Dawson disappeared as soon as she hit the big time. TiTtyboy went completely nuts and got banned (the most outrageous injustice in DUmp history).

ThomWV has nearly disappeared. Only rarely do we hear the rattle of his human-tooth necklace. DUmmies atman and Redstone have become rare posters, due, I think to their fear of the wrath of the coach.

The Las Vegas whale has become nearly extinct, since his tragic cyberbullying.

How about coach's protege (can't remember his name), the nutcase who wrote the worst science fiction in the history of the world? All gone, or virtually gone, as soon as the spotlight fell upon them. Sort of like roaches. 

Well, that's what gets me.

We're nice people here; all we're doing is quoting the primitives, quoting the primitives' own words.

And then we're giving them an appreciative audience far beyond the shores of Skins's island.

Think of all of the soda-fountain girls, the janitorial guys, in Hollywood over the decades who busted their asses to become a star; it's very hard work.

And here, the primitives are offered stardom on a silver platter, no effort on their part.

And then they freeze up from stage fright.

I'm going to have to change from anthropology to psychology, I guess, to figure it out.

[AllosaursRus]

DUmmy husb2Sparkly and the know-it-all DUmmy are just the most recent examples, though the know-it-all's arrogance appears to be limitless, and she may return in force. Some of the all-time DUmp stars dried up and blew away shortly after winning center stage. How about DUmmy TwixVoy? Or TruthIsAll? Top DUmbass Pam Dawson disappeared as soon as she hit the big time. TiTtyboy went completely nuts and got banned (the most outrageous injustice in DUmp history). ThomWV has nearly disappeared. Only rarely do we hear the rattle of his human-tooth necklace. DUmmies atman and Redstone have become rare posters, due, I think to their fear of the wrath of the coach. The Las Vegas whale has become nearly extinct, since his tragic cyberbullying. How about coach's protege (can't remember his name), the nutcase who wrote the worst science fiction in the history of the world? All gone, or virtually gone, as soon as the spotlight fell upon them. Sort of like roaches. 

And this is a bad thing?

[Carl]

Yes and we should...they are a blight on humanity.

[thundley4]

And this is a bad thing?

In a way, yes. The stooooopidest of the DUmmies provide us with entertainment.

[franksolich]

In a way, yes. The stooooopidest of the DUmmies provide us with entertainment.

The only primitive who's ever cooperated with franksolich in his attempts to make her a star is, of course, the hippywife Mrs. Alfred Packer.

And because she's cooperating, I guess she's becoming a star.

[thundley4]

The only primitive who's ever cooperated with franksolich in his attempts to make her a star is, of course, the hippywife Mrs. Alfred Packer.

And because she's cooperating, I guess she's becoming a star.

That might be because you give her some small respite from being miserable all of the time.

[GOBUCKS]

And this is a bad thing?

It's a really bad thing to lose an entertaining DUmmy from the DUmp. It's bad to lose even those that aren't in the upper echelon of lunacy, like, for example, the chinless 'Bama butterball. But when we lose a true star, it's terrible. Go to the DUmping Ground and reread the best of Bouncing Ball and TomInTib, and compare them to the vapid numbskulls who swarm the DUmp today. We can wade through mountains of trash over there now, and never come across a nugget as golden as even the worst TiTtyboy post.

[miskie]

I still vote "no, and I wish we did" - most of them are still blissfully unaware that this site exists, and most of our favorite primitives end up removed from the island either voluntarily or by force.

[franksolich]

That might be because you give her some small respite from being miserable all of the time.

The hippywife Mrs. Alfred Packer happened by sheer chance and accident.

At the time--this was a few years ago--I was concentrating upon making the defrocked warped primitive, the "warpy" primitive, a star, but the bitter vindictive old mule wasn't cooperating, biting this hand that was feeding her.

The defrocked warped primitive could've been a star, but no.....

At the time, the hippywife primitive--this was when she was re-baptized "Grandma"--hung around a lot with the defrocked warped primitive.

Like Saul on the road to Damascus, I suddenly saw Grandma had talent.

The name however was a problem, which is why she was re-re-baptized "Mrs. Alfred Packer," after hippyhubby Wild Bill came into prominence.

[AllosaursRus]

It's a really bad thing to lose an entertaining DUmmy from the DUmp. It's bad to lose even those that aren't in the upper echelon of lunacy, like, for example, the chinless 'Bama butterball. But when we lose a true star, it's terrible. Go to the DUmping Ground and reread the best of Bouncing Ball and TomInTib, and compare them to the vapid numbskulls who swarm the DUmp today. We can wade through mountains of trash over there now, and never come across a nugget as golden as even the worst TiTtyboy post.

Oooooh, ya do have a point there Gobee! It hasn't been the same since we lost Tommy Boy!

I surely do miss the 2nd highest decorated DUmmie of all time!!!!

[JLO]

The only primitive who's ever cooperated with franksolich in his attempts to make her a star is, of course, the hippywife Mrs. Alfred Packer.

And because she's cooperating, I guess she's becoming a star.

Really, wow - is she writing privately?   

How did she seem?   I honestly like her a lot 







/

[franksolich]

Really, wow - is she writing privately?   

How did she seem?   I honestly like her a lot 

Well, it's perfectly fine to like her, madam, but remember, people are like diamonds.

They have several faces, and one sees only one face at a time.

What franksolich is seeing from his angle is that Mrs. Alfred Packer is not a nice person; she imagines herself as good and wholesome and homey and "old fashioned" and "down home" and pleasant and all that, but we all have inflated opinions of ourselves.

[SSG Snuggle Bunny]

Why would they be driven nuts (especially since gas is so expensive and they're within walking distance of Nuts)?

You would think that people being quoted at length would be proud to be paid such honors if they truly believed what they said.

If you don't mean it or are embarrassed by it, then don't say it!

It'd be like someone coming up and say:

ACCUSER: SGT Snuggle Bunny! We have photos of you in a drunken tryst with 3 swimsuit and lingerie models!

ME: Ummm...

ACCUSER: You can't deny it! We have proof!

ME: Deny it! I want my cut when they get on the internet! What's the URL? I want to tell all my friends.


But at the end of the day, through all the puffery and arrogance, they really are insecure, frustrated shitbag losers and they know it.