Author Topic: Blind Date  (Read 7152 times)

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Offline littlelamb

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Blind Date
« on: January 16, 2011, 11:46:00 AM »
I just had the funniest blind date. I thought some of you would get a huge laugh like I did. I went out with this joker and he tried telling me he was a Black Ops Marine. At age 38 he was asked by Obama to be a General. He was trying to tell me all this bogus shit to try and get me into bed with him. As the night wore on and on I had nothing to do but laugh. I would ask him questions about the military pretending to be clueless about the military. (He never knew that my dad is a retired officer and ex husband spent time in the military) I would ask him some of the dumbest questions and knew he was blowing smoke out of his ass when I asked him some basic questions that even a brand new recruit would know and he didn't have a clue. I just love when men pull out their umm equipment so to speak and then realize that mine is bigger I ended the night with a little warning to him that the next time he thinks he is going to get a woman into bed pretending your a officer wont work.  That on your XBox you may have achieved rank but in real life it doesent count. You may be a General but to this former MILITARY brat and married to it does not make it true in real life. So go back to playing Call of Duty and grow up.
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline Reality vs DU

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #1 on: January 16, 2011, 12:34:17 PM »
I just had the funniest blind date. I thought some of you would get a huge laugh like I did. I went out with this joker and he tried telling me he was a Black Ops Marine. At age 38 he was asked by Obama to be a General. He was trying to tell me all this bogus shit to try and get me into bed with him. As the night wore on and on I had nothing to do but laugh. I would ask him questions about the military pretending to be clueless about the military. (He never knew that my dad is a retired officer and ex husband spent time in the military) I would ask him some of the dumbest questions and knew he was blowing smoke out of his ass when I asked him some basic questions that even a brand new recruit would know and he didn't have a clue. I just love when men pull out their umm equipment so to speak and then realize that mine is bigger I ended the night with a little warning to him that the next time he thinks he is going to get a woman into bed pretending your a officer wont work.  That on your XBox you may have achieved rank but in real life it doesent count. You may be a General but to this former MILITARY brat and married to it does not make it true in real life. So go back to playing Call of Duty and grow up.

You had a blind date with TomInTib?

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #2 on: January 16, 2011, 12:38:36 PM »
Not that I know about LOL
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #3 on: January 16, 2011, 01:23:20 PM »
Next time a coworker wants to set me up on a blind date I need to ask them if they have a DU account
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline longview

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #4 on: January 16, 2011, 01:25:55 PM »
That on your XBox you may have achieved rank but in real life it doesent count.

 :rotf:

I am past dating age, but I observe quite a bit of this being tried on my younger friends. 

Offline Ballygrl

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #5 on: January 16, 2011, 01:27:11 PM »
:lmao: :cheersmate:

I did 2 blind dates in my single days, the 1st 1 I was wearing fake nails, it was back in the 80's where we glued them ourselves, he grabbed my hand to hold it and to gaze into my eyes I guess, the nail snapped and hit him in the face, the 2nd blind date, I need to preface this by saying I'm 5'8", with heels I'm 5'11", my co-worker wanted me to go out with her step-son, she didn't tell me he was like 4'5", that was it as far as blind dates go!
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Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #6 on: January 16, 2011, 01:59:07 PM »
Blind dates is proof God has a sense of humor LOL
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline Ballygrl

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #7 on: January 16, 2011, 02:25:54 PM »
Blind dates is proof God has a sense of humor LOL

:lmao:
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"The nation that couldn’t be conquered by foreign enemies has been conquered by its elected officials" odawg Free Republic in reference to the GOP Elites who are no difference than the Democrats

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #8 on: January 16, 2011, 06:37:06 PM »
I just got off the phone with my coworker I think I made her pee her pants from laughter LOL
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #9 on: January 16, 2011, 06:44:57 PM »
 :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:

Comedy gold!  Thanks for the laugh, Littlelamb!
Go and tell the Spartans, O traveler passing by
That here, obedient to their law, we lie.

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Offline ColonialMarine0431

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #10 on: January 16, 2011, 06:50:10 PM »
Black Ops Marine? What was his code name? Agent Orange?

Obama asked him to be a general?  :loser:
I'll See Your Jihad and Raise You One Crusade

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #11 on: January 16, 2011, 06:51:01 PM »
:rotf: :rotf: :rotf:

Comedy gold!  Thanks for the laugh, Littlelamb!
.                                                          


Anytime. DAT                                                                                                                       :-)
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #12 on: January 16, 2011, 06:56:11 PM »
Black Ops Marine? What was his code name? Agent Orange?

Obama asked him to be a general?  :loser:


When I asked him about the Marine symbol he said it was classified. I said really because even my teenager knew what it was and he was in MCJROTC. I then mentioned Stolen Valor and he looked clueless
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline ColonialMarine0431

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #13 on: January 16, 2011, 07:05:30 PM »

When I asked him about the Marine symbol he said it was classified. I said really because even my teenager knew what it was and he was in MCJROTC. I then mentioned Stolen Valor and he looked clueless

Priceless. I could tell you what the Eagle, Globe & Anchor stands for. But i'd have to kill you afterwards.  :lmao:

I'll See Your Jihad and Raise You One Crusade

Offline Boudicca

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #14 on: January 16, 2011, 08:23:18 PM »
What a douchebag. :thatsright:
I went out on a blind date and the guy kept pulling ALL his credit cards out of his wallet and boasting about how much money he had.  I assume he thought he could buy his way into my bed. :hammer:
That was it for me as far as blind dates.  They should rename them blind, deaf and DUMB dates.
You know, there's quite a niche in the romance novel genre for Black Ops types.  Maybe your "date" has strange reading preferences for a man.  If you ever run across him again, tell him from me, thanks for the laugh. :rotf:
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Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #15 on: January 16, 2011, 08:25:14 PM »
Priceless. I could tell you what the Eagle, Globe & Anchor stands for. But i'd have to kill you afterwards.  :lmao:




Oh please tell me I promise I wont tell anyone  :whistling: or do I need to call my "Black Op General" LOL
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #16 on: January 16, 2011, 08:27:49 PM »
What a douchebag. :thatsright:
I went out on a blind date and the guy kept pulling ALL his credit cards out of his wallet and boasting about how much money he had.  I assume he thought he could buy his way into my bed. :hammer:
That was it for me as far as blind dates.  They should rename them blind, deaf and DUMB dates.
You know, there's quite a niche in the romance novel genre for Black Ops types.  Maybe your "date" has strange reading preferences for a man.  If you ever run across him again, tell him from me, thanks for the laugh. :rotf:


I told my friend that set me up with him that I should kick her butt for setting me up with him but he made me laugh when I got home and some people I know (didn't tell her where) thinks he is nuts
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline Celtic Rose

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #17 on: January 16, 2011, 08:31:10 PM »
Too funny!  I went on a date a few months ago, and I realized shortly into the date that the guy was old enough to be my father.  Seemed nice enough, but I made it clear that I though the age difference was too much, then I offered to pay my half of the dinner.  He told me he had it covered.  He had made several comments during dinner about how successful he was etc. We went our separate ways, and I figure that would be the end of it.  A few days later, he called me 4 times while I was at work.  When I got home, I listened to his voice mails, and he was asking when we could meet so I could pay him back for for dinner because he couldn't afford to buy food that week  :thatsright:

Seriously, all I want is a normal guy, is that too much to ask for?

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #18 on: January 16, 2011, 08:37:14 PM »
Too funny!  I went on a date a few months ago, and I realized shortly into the date that the guy was old enough to be my father.  Seemed nice enough, but I made it clear that I though the age difference was too much, then I offered to pay my half of the dinner.  He told me he had it covered.  He had made several comments during dinner about how successful he was etc. We went our separate ways, and I figure that would be the end of it.  A few days later, he called me 4 times while I was at work.  When I got home, I listened to his voice mails, and he was asking when we could meet so I could pay him back for for dinner because he couldn't afford to buy food that week  :thatsright:

Seriously, all I want is a normal guy, is that too much to ask for?

Nope not too much to ask I agree is there any decent men out there? Either they are all taken or have a boyfriend LOL
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline NHSparky

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #19 on: January 17, 2011, 01:24:50 PM »
Priceless. I could tell you what the Eagle, Globe & Anchor stands for. But i'd have to kill you afterwards.  :lmao:



That's easy--it's a seagull sitting on a beachball, screaming, "GO NAVY!!!"
“Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian.”  -Henry Ford

Offline Boudicca

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #20 on: January 17, 2011, 02:56:25 PM »
That's easy--it's a seagull sitting on a beachball, screaming, "GO NAVY!!!"

You SO bad.  Gotta share it with my son though.  He can't keep him mouth shut about his Dad and me being "Army pukes". :rotf:
Sneaking into a country doesn't make you an immigrant any
more than breaking into someone's house makes you part of the family.
(Poster bolky from thehill.com blog discussion)

Offline debk

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #21 on: January 17, 2011, 02:57:06 PM »
That's easy--it's a seagull sitting on a beachball, screaming, "GO NAVY!!!"


 :cheersmate:
Just hand over the chocolate...back away slowly...far away....and you won't get hurt....

Save the Earth... it's the only planet with chocolate.

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A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands.

Offline cavegal

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #22 on: January 17, 2011, 03:06:30 PM »
What a  entertaining thread....
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At age 38 he was asked by Obama to be a General
  :lmao:


“Look, we’re led by a man that either is not tough, not smart, or he’s got something else in mind,”  Donald J.Trump. 6/13/16

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #23 on: January 17, 2011, 08:31:04 PM »
That's easy--it's a seagull sitting on a beachball, screaming, "GO NAVY!!!"


I told the teenager he needed to go into ROTC in the morning and tell Gunny and Major that and see how many pushups it will cost him :naughty:
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

Offline littlelamb

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Re: Blind Date
« Reply #24 on: January 17, 2011, 08:32:57 PM »
You SO bad.  Gotta share it with my son though.  He can't keep him mouth shut about his Dad and me being "Army pukes". :rotf:


I told it to my dad who has been retired for 20 years that I don't know which was better the look on my dad's face or the soda coming out his nose from laughing so hard about it.
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.