Ft. LEWIS, WA - As the out-going congress passed a controversial repeal of the Clinton-era "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy on homosexuals in the military, new challenges emerge to confront a segment of the military population that, until now, has served in the shadows.
Whether they have been known as "shirkers", "slackers" or "brown-brickers" they are simply those who have feigned homosexuality to be discharged from the military before the expiration of their enlistments and now they have nowhere to turn.
"Sure, my battle-buddy is celebrating," said one Private First-Class who wished to remain anonymous, "But he's actually gay and wants to be here."
"I could drop a DVD of myself in a San Francisco bathhouse servicing a dozen old men while in drag but I would still have to report for KP duty on the weekend," he complained.
"What are people like me supposed to do?"
Others were worried they might have to deploy to places such as Iraq or Afghanistan.
"I don't think considered us or our feelings when they passed this law."
Some brown-brickers lamented they might be forced to return to such archaic methods of escaping their contractual obligations such as shooting one's self in the foot.
"I have one option left before it comes to that," said our interviewee as he adorned his section of the barracks in Obama campaign materials in the hopes of gaining a discharge for mental health issues.
