Doug's stupid ex-wife getting nagged by long-suffering mother

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=276x10832

Oh my.

EFerrari  (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-26-10 01:02 AM
DOUG'S STUPID EX-WIFE, #03 TOP PRIMITIVE OF 2009
Original message

So, my mom is having cogniive distortion when she's stressed out and she hears me attacking her when I'm not.

Yesterday, I thanked her for calling my brother about something and she heard me asking her to thank me.

Today, she went ballistic when I told her we were out of laundry soap, I think she heard me say, "I want you to go get laundry soap right now".

She's been fighting off a foreclosure for the last week and doing a great job but she must be exhausted. And for the last week, she's been going off on me in the strangest ways. I know this happens when there is over the top stress and try not to engage with it. But, it makes dailiness really difficult.

I've asked her to make an appointment with her doctor on Monday and I plan to go in with her. Maybe there's meds that will help what looks like low level paranoia or whatever this is.

She's in the middle of a million dollar deal. (Yikes)

In better, other news, I've signed up to get certification to teach English as a foreign language. Gave up on going back for any other degree because tuition is unbelievably high. But, this course starts in November and it's the very first thing I've looked forward to in a long time.

mopinko   (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-26-10 12:14 PM
THE HYPOCHONDRIAL PRIMITIVE
Response to Original message

1. yikes. 

maybe she just needs some anxiety meds or something. DH has the same sort of hearing, tho. really frustrating.
keep us up to date.

and congrats on the class. i am really enjoying my classes, which start again at the end of the week.

EFerrari  (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-26-10 12:47 PM
DOUG'S STUPID EX-WIFE, #03 TOP PRIMITIVE OF 2009
Response to Reply #1

2. Doug used to get that kind of "hearing" when he was getting stressed out.

It acts like low level paranoia and it's almost invisible to any one who is a little "farther away" than I was as his wife. It was my best clue that we were headed into a decompensation if I didn't find a way to lower the stress level right away.

I'm glad now that I had that experience because it's a little easier to detach enough to try some handling instead of some reacting.

Anxiety meds could help. My concern is that I don't know anything about conditions that come with age and maybe this is an indicator for something else. I guess I'll find out. I had her sign a release of information to her doc but also, to the whole clinic some weeks ago.

mopinko   (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-26-10 05:19 PM
THE HYPOCHONDRIAL PRIMITIVE
Response to Reply #2

3. that's good. you need someone when you are in that medical industrial complex. i never let anyone i care about go to the hospital alone.

it could be an age related thing. hope you get a handle on it.

Hmmmm.

One doesn't suppose Doug's stupid ex-wife ever sat down to think about what might be driving her mother nuts.

No, she probably doesn't do that at all.

[Wineslob]

In better, other news, I've signed up to get certification to teach English as a foreign language. Gave up on going back for any other degree because tuition is unbelievably high. But, this course starts in November and it's the very first thing I've looked forward to in a long time

Typical DUmbass. Always the perpetual student and never employed.

[SSG Snuggle Bunny]

So, my mom is having cogniive distortion when she's stressed out and she hears me attacking her when I'm not.

How many fights to DUmbasses start with each other when they're essentially trying to agree?

[franksolich]

Typical DUmbass. Always the perpetual student and never employed.

And considering she's 55 years old.....

[diesel driver]

Typical DUmbass. Always the perpetual student and never employed.

Hard to find a real job in their field.

Wymens studies, underwater basketweaving, journalism, etc.  

[Tucker]

Today, she went ballistic when I told her we were out of laundry soap, I think she heard me say, "I want you to go get laundry soap right now".

I don't imagine that the conversation was cordial. I suspect a demand from Beth prior to this reply.

[JohnnyReb]

I've asked her to make an appointment with her doctor on Monday and I plan to go in with her. Maybe there's meds that will help what looks like low level paranoia or whatever this is.

She's in the middle of a million dollar deal. (Yikes)

Momma's not paranoid....you really are trying to drug her up and steal her good fortune.

[AllosaursRus]

She's in the middle of a million dollar deal. (Yikes)

I guess she just had to add that little morsel in to rub it into the DIvers, huh?

2. Doug used to get that kind of "hearing" when he was getting stressed out.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Any chance that came from livin' with you, beth?

[Tucker]

I guess she just had to add that little morsel in to rub it into the DIvers, huh?

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Any chance that came from livin' with you, beth?

What the common denominator in both scenarios?

[DumbAss Tanker]

2. Doug used to get that kind of "hearing" when he was getting stressed out.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Any chance that came from livin' with you, beth?

  

I'm with Tucker!  "Doc, everyone around me seems to have this weird mental problem..."

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

EFerrari  (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-26-10 01:02 AM
DOUG'S STUPID EX-WIFE, #03 TOP PRIMITIVE OF 2009
Original message

So, my mom is having cogniive distortion when she's stressed out and she hears me attacking her when I'm not.

Yesterday, I thanked her for calling my brother about something and she heard me asking her to thank me.

Today, she went ballistic when I told her we were out of laundry soap, I think she heard me say, "I want you to go get laundry soap right now".

She's been fighting off a foreclosure for the last week and doing a great job but she must be exhausted. And for the last week, she's been going off on me in the strangest ways. I know this happens when there is over the top stress and try not to engage with it. But, it makes dailiness really difficult.

I've asked her to make an appointment with her doctor on Monday and I plan to go in with her. Maybe there's meds that will help what looks like low level paranoia or whatever this is.

She's in the middle of a million dollar deal. (Yikes)

In better, other news, I've signed up to get certification to teach English as a foreign language. Gave up on going back for any other degree because tuition is unbelievably high. But, this course starts in November and it's the very first thing I've looked forward to in a long time.

Here's a fancy idear Beth....How's about getting off your ass,get a job so that you may go and buy laundry detergent and also help your poor mother avoid foreclosure? Also...cognitive distortion?.......Me thinks it's actually "mykidisauselesslumpashititis"! But i only play a shrink on the internet so what do i know? 

[Karin]

How can her mother be in the middle of a million dollar deal and foreclosure?  Is it that the "ranch" is worth a million dollars, but mom can't afford current payments?  I dunno, I'm confused.  All I know is I'd go nuts living with Beth, too.  

She's throwing around those Psych 101 words...cognitive....decompensation...levels of paranoia...anxiety med speculations.  I'm sooooo impressed.  

It was my best clue that we were headed into a decompensation if I didn't find a way to lower the stress level right away.

  Decompensation means a failure of defense mechanisms.  I'm not sure she knows that that's what it is.  Ye Gods, Doug is a lucky man.  Now that he's made it through that purgatory, anything life throws him is sweet as pie.   

[Chris_]

"Million-dollar deal".

My guess is some kind of lawsuit.

[delilahmused]

How can her mother be in the middle of a million dollar deal and foreclosure?  Is it that the "ranch" is worth a million dollars, but mom can't afford current payments?  I dunno, I'm confused.  All I know is I'd go nuts living with Beth, too. 
She's throwing around those Psych 101 words...cognitive....decompensation...levels of paranoia...anxiety med speculations.  I'm sooooo impressed. 

Not only that, but if mom is competent enough to handle foreclosure issues (and fighting them off no less) and million dollar deals, why the hell would she give an incompetent, unemployed daughter access to her medical records? Someone who can't handle their own life has no business getting in the middle of someone else's. She should have more respect for someone she's sponging off of. However, I bet the laundry soap issue went something like this:

"Hey mom, we're out of laundry soap and I need to wash my clothes because my classes start soon."

"Well, what are you telling me for? Go to the store and get some?"

"You know I don't have any money and my car doesn't have any gas. What the hell am I supposed to do? This is important!"

"Getting a job is important, too but you can't be bothered with that!"

"That's why I'm going to school, so I can get a job in my chosen field."

"How about a job, even a part time job in an UNchosen field to help with the expenses around here?"

"You know I've been through a lot and I've been on meds and Doug was so mean and I lost my house and my heart is so broken because I've written to Hugo 100's of times and he doesn't even write back, even though he's perfectly willing to meet with that hag, Cindy Sheehan."

"Beth, get your head out of your ass and quit living in a fantasy world! You live in a trailer on your mother's property. Might as well be an above-ground basement. You won't work, you're a crazy, demanding little bitch and this whole thing has just become pathetic! Here's $10 and my car keys, but I expect you to do my laundry as well since I'm paying for it"

"Fine! Sheesh, do I have to do everything around here?!"

Cindie

[Ballygrl]

She's in the middle of a million dollar deal. (Yikes)

Other than bragging, why was it necessary to bring that up?

[franksolich]

Other than bragging, why was it necessary to bring that up?

Doug's stupid ex-wife likes to flaunt her stuff.

She once had a great body to flaunt, but now it's sagging, but she still wants to flaunt, and so it's money she flaunts.

[true_blood]

mopinko   (1000+ posts)        Sun Sep-26-10 12:14 PM
THE HYPOCHONDRIAL PRIMITIVE
Response to Original message

1. yikes.

maybe she just needs some anxiety meds or something. DH has the same sort of hearing, tho. really frustrating.
keep us up to date.

and congrats on the class. i am really enjoying my classes, which start again at the end of the week.

NO!!!! I wouldn't believe that a DUmmie suggest that maybe she needs some "head meds" or drugs to cure her.

[Ballygrl]

Doug's stupid ex-wife likes to flaunt her stuff.

She once had a great body to flaunt, but now it's sagging, but she still wants to flaunt, and so it's money she flaunts.

She's very ignorant then because you don't brag like that when people around you are hurting.

[DumbAss Tanker]

She's very ignorant then because you don't brag like that when people around you are hurting.

On DU, uncommon ignorance is a common vice.

[FlaGator]

But she has a graduate degree.

[Wineslob]

Doug's stupid ex-wife likes to flaunt her stuff.

She once had a great body to flaunt, but now it's sagging, but she still wants to flaunt, and so it's money she flaunts.

Ahh, I see, flapping in the breeze, so to speak.

[AllosaursRus]

How can her mother be in the middle of a million dollar deal and foreclosure?  Is it that the "ranch" is worth a million dollars, but mom can't afford current payments?  I dunno, I'm confused.  All I know is I'd go nuts living with Beth, too. 

She's throwing around those Psych 101 words...cognitive....decompensation...levels of paranoia...anxiety med speculations.  I'm sooooo impressed. 
  Decompensation means a failure of defense mechanisms.  I'm not sure she knows that that's what it is.  Ye Gods, Doug is a lucky man.  Now that he's made it through that purgatory, anything life throws him is sweet as pie.   

I dunno, perhaps if she could spell them right I would be impressed! Otherwise, not so much!

[AllosaursRus]

Not only that, but if mom is competent enough to handle foreclosure issues (and fighting them off no less) and million dollar deals, why the hell would she give an incompetent, unemployed daughter access to her medical records? Someone who can't handle their own life has no business getting in the middle of someone else's. She should have more respect for someone she's sponging off of. However, I bet the laundry soap issue went something like this:

"Hey mom, we're out of laundry soap and I need to wash my clothes because my classes start soon."

"Well, what are you telling me for? Go to the store and get some?"

"You know I don't have any money and my car doesn't have any gas. What the hell am I supposed to do? This is important!"

"Getting a job is important, too but you can't be bothered with that!"

"That's why I'm going to school, so I can get a job in my chosen field."

"How about a job, even a part time job in an UNchosen field to help with the expenses around here?"

"You know I've been through a lot and I've been on meds and Doug was so mean and I lost my house and my heart is so broken because I've written to Hugo 100's of times and he doesn't even write back, even though he's perfectly willing to meet with that hag, Cindy Sheehan."

"Beth, get your head out of your ass and quit living in a fantasy world! You live in a trailer on your mother's property. Might as well be an above-ground basement. You won't work, you're a crazy, demanding little bitch and this whole thing has just become pathetic! Here's $10 and my car keys, but I expect you to do my laundry as well since I'm paying for it"

"Fine! Sheesh, do I have to do everything around here?!"

Cindie

Fantastic Cin, just fantastic, and more than likely much closer to the truth! Beth strikes me as the worst kind of leach. It's all about her, screw momma and everybody else! They just don't "understand" her!