So, Britain will spell Schedule as Shedjool, and Americans will spell it Skedjool and we'll have Basil and Baysil. Heaven forbid we get the Scottish and Irish spelling in there

The English language has so many spelling rules because it is an amalgamation of all the cultures that lived in the British Isles, and now all the other English speaking countries. Words like school, light, and house show their germanic roots, and at one point, all the letters were pronounced. We have many, many words derived from French, specifically the French spoken by the Norman conquerors. Few of our words are Celtic in origin, but it has been proposed that our pronunciation of word may have been deeply influenced by Celtic languages.
As far as I'm concerned, people can learn how to spell English words. I do not believe for a moment that 40% of Americans are illiterate due to our spelling rules.