My story? About five years ago, a bunch of goths/tweekers/dipshits/DUmmies were parking on the street behind my house, then drinking/getting high in the Santa Ana River channel under the overpasses down the street. They'd do that for a few weekends, showing up around 10 PM, yelling, screaming, generally being douchebags, and then leave around 3 AM with the same results.
One weekend I tired of it and asked them to quiet it down. One of the five or six "yutes" decided he wanted to pull a belt make of bike chain out. Guess he didn't like the odds. Fine, says I. I walked the 100 yards back to the house (why they didn't think better and leave escapes me) and called the police.
One of the "yutes" and his two girlfriends were coming down when I informed them that they weren't about to go anywhere with the police arriving and in their inebriated condition. That's when dumbass decides to take a swing at me. Four or five return hits later, with blood running from his head and holding onto his face, he's stumbling to his car, starting it up, and tries to run me over. His "girlfriends" are screaming at me, calling me everything under the sun for beating up their friend, and calling the cops (not aware I already have). Luckily, I managed to step out of the way as he's only going a few mph, but somehow he doesn't quite have the reaction time necessary to avoid hitting the car of one of the residents.
That's about when the police showed up. They took my ID, my statement, took their statements, the other three cops were rousting the rest of the "yutes" from the underpass, where I get to take a ride over and ID the one who pulled the chain/belt out on me.
So, long story short, driver (18 y/o) gets nailed for ADW, DUI, underage drinking, belt boy gets popped for ADW and underage drinking, all but one of the others get cited for public intoxication and underage drinking (except for one who got arrested for posession of pot), and all their cars got impounded because they were all drunk.
And the wife was pissed at ME. Go figure.
Whoops. Of course, after I heard about the charges they faced, I never had to go to court, never heard from any lawyers or investigators, and the "yutes" never showed up there again. Guess taking matters into your own hands does have some benefits every now and then.