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Offline Chris_

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My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« on: January 04, 2010, 03:56:08 PM »
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Writer  (1000+ posts)        Mon Jan-04-10 02:41 PM
Original message

My father-in-law told me that I need to...
 drop out of my doctoral program if I want to start a family. He's a 73 year-old Mexican immigrant. I didn't need to say much back, though. My husband and sister-in-law both became furious with him, with my sister-in-law telling him that he was being extremely rude and that it was "none of his business."

He's kind of an impish, peevish person whose arrogance and illogic leads him to say sometimes cruel or disrespectful things. I at first ignored him, and wrote him off as being childish and intrusive. But it has made me and my husband very angry since then. I told my husband that my family believes in strong, educated women, and his father has no right telling someone else's daughter how to live her life. My husband agrees, but he's rather upset.

My father-in-law can sometimes bully my husband, but I don't want to dictate to him what to do. However, I want my husband to maintain some self-respect.

((Sigh)) drama.

On a good note: I'm going to see Craig Ferguson in concert this weekend!
 

Sigh all you want, that's a lie.  How ugly of you to disrespect your father in law like that, writing something so hateful for everyone to see. You were on the DUmp one night crying about having a baby.  You never mentioned your father in law then.

Maybe your husband doesn't want to have a child with you.  You complain constantly about being depressed. He knows he'll end up working, taking care of the baby and the house while you cry and lay around saying you just CAN'T do it !  Strong educated woman my butt.  You're weak sista.

Quote
JustABozoOnThisBus  (1000+ posts)      Mon Jan-04-10 03:33 PM

Response to Original message
1. What's his leverage?

 Is your FIL paying your bills? Your tuition?

Otherwise, his is just one opinion. Want to hear my opinion? It should carry the same (light) weight.

Just thank him for his input, and continue doing whatever it is that doctoral candidates do.

 

She's getting old and Pops probably asked if she was ever going to give him a grandchild.

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Kali  (1000+ posts)      Mon Jan-04-10 04:07 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. agree

 Edited on Mon Jan-04-10 04:08 PM by Kali

consider the source (culture + age)

sounds pretty normal, tell Papa you love him, thank him for expressing his feelings and continue with your life


The source is writing the OP and telling stories.
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Online Texacon

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #1 on: January 04, 2010, 04:01:05 PM »
Quote
Kali  (1000+ posts)      Mon Jan-04-10 04:07 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. agree

 Edited on Mon Jan-04-10 04:08 PM by Kali

consider the source (culture + age)

sounds pretty normal, tell Papa you love him, thank him for expressing his feelings and continue with your life


Wow.  Racism and ageism in the same post.  Nice.

KC
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #2 on: January 04, 2010, 04:33:02 PM »
Quote from: shadeaux on January 04, 2010, 03:56:08 PM
She's getting old and Pops probably asked if she was ever going to give him a grandchild.


She's probably been going to college for 26 years. Pop finally has had enough. He probably said something more along the lines of, "Have a young'n or get a job. For Gods sake get off your ass and do SOMETHING."
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #3 on: January 04, 2010, 04:49:44 PM »
I hope DUmmy Writer isn't working on a doctorate in bouncies.
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #4 on: January 04, 2010, 04:56:48 PM »
Wow. I hope her FIL sees that.
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Offline Karin

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #5 on: January 05, 2010, 10:26:20 AM »
Drama queen and attention whore.  All this anger and emotion, with two people supposedly lighting into old man, ganging up on him?  Raise your hand if you've never had an in law tell you what to do.  It doesn't make you special, writer, or deserving of even a DUmp post.  Try having an Arab for an in-law, then come crying. 
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Offline Ree

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #6 on: January 05, 2010, 11:00:25 AM »
Not bright enough to smile, nod, then do as ya want?
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Offline dandi

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #7 on: January 05, 2010, 11:14:21 AM »
Quote
He's kind of an impish, peevish person whose arrogance and illogic leads him to say sometimes cruel or disrespectful things.

Sounds like a reflection of yourself, princess.  Sure he isn't your daddy?
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Offline RobJohnson

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #8 on: January 06, 2010, 02:03:18 AM »
Quote from: GOBUCKS on January 04, 2010, 04:49:44 PM
I hope DUmmy Writer isn't working on a doctorate in bouncies.


 :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #9 on: January 06, 2010, 10:44:50 AM »
Quote from: JohnnyReb on January 04, 2010, 04:33:02 PM
She's probably been going to college for 26 years. Pop finally has had enough. He probably said something more along the lines of, "Have a young'n or get a job. For Gods sake get off your ass and do SOMETHING."

Exactly my thought. Probably a "perpetual student". My brother is married to one. Every year we get how with "just one more class she'll be a RN" for the last 6-7 years.
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Offline ConservativeMobster

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #10 on: January 06, 2010, 11:41:46 AM »
At 73 he isn't getting any younger, wants to play with those babies before he's too old to get up off the floor without a lift.  ::)
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Offline AllosaursRus

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #11 on: January 06, 2010, 11:46:09 AM »
Quote from: Wineslob on January 06, 2010, 10:44:50 AM
Exactly my thought. Probably a "perpetual student". My brother is married to one. Every year we get how with "just one more class she'll be a RN" for the last 6-7 years.

I've known several "professional" students over the years. All never seemed to have "enough" education, was carrying an enormous student loan debt, and was a liberal, who never seemed to get a job. Just one credit short of ___________, (fill in blank with favorite useless, liberal doctorate), was the excuse.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #12 on: January 06, 2010, 12:47:43 PM »
She can't even take care of household emergencies without DUmp help.  Imagine that one with a baby. 

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Writer  (1000+ posts)        Wed Jan-06-10 03:13 AM
Original message

Help! There's water slowly dripping through a light fixture...
 This is a spot on the ceiling beneath a gable on which we installed a roof-mount evaporative cooler this summer. I'm going to guess that, in the installation, they left a hole in our roof - or, at least, enough that would cause a leak from the melting snow on the roof. Unbelievable.

I guess I can call the insurance company, but to be honest, I think the installers need to come out here and take a look at this. Oh - and one other thing - the company that did our sealing and insulation work SEALED SHUT THE ATTIC ACCESS. My husband had to beat it open to take a look at the roof.

Any good means of taking care of this problem as quickly as possible?
 

How do you not notice the attic sealed after the job was completed ? Your husband should pay for that part because HE was the dumbass for not seeing it.

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denbot  (876 posts)        Wed Jan-06-10 03:17 AM
Response to Original message

1. Get that contractor back asap.
 Don't take any shit from them. Get the number to your state contractors license board and let the company that installed it know that they will be the next number called if they are not there asap.
Any resulting damage from a faulty installation is their responsibility. Then call your insurance company.

Yeah.   :-)  Get ugly.

Quote
Writer  (1000+ posts)        Wed Jan-06-10 03:35 AM
Response to Reply #1

2. Thanks... I did write the man an email, and I will follow-up with a phone call in the morning.
 It's actually a fairly good company, and they guarantee their work, but it was also installed as part of a energy savings improvement program in our county. Their reputation is rather important to maintain, as the county is continuing the program and they'd like to continue reaping the benefits.

OH, you got the government program.  I see.  What did you expect ?  Good work ? Don't hold your breath waiting for them to come back and fix it.  They got paid !

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michreject  (1000+ posts)        Wed Jan-06-10 08:47 AM
Response to Reply #2

3. This is why you should only deal with companies
 that are bonded and insured. Otherwise you're SOL. 

Yeah, all those community programs are insured and bonded.

The ones here did little to no work and got paid millions.  They were insured and bonded.  The freebies ALWAYS cost more.  Always.

Remember that Writer.  You super educated strong woman.   :whatever:
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #13 on: January 06, 2010, 02:26:54 PM »
Quote
She can't even take care of household emergencies without DUmp help.


Na...she just wants to bitch about it. Reminds me of someone else................ :innocent:
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #14 on: January 06, 2010, 02:51:23 PM »
I hope she really isn't pissing away a fortune on a doctorate, just to become a writer.  If she is, she really should drop back, punt, and put a bun in the oven.  She probably can do that without screwing it up hopelessly, at least.   
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Offline Chris_

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #15 on: January 06, 2010, 03:40:08 PM »
I'm sure her Phd. in advanced burrito history will really pay of for her  :rotf:
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: My father-in-law told me that I need to...
« Reply #16 on: January 06, 2010, 10:17:45 PM »
Quote from: DumbAss Tanker on January 06, 2010, 02:51:23 PM
I hope she really isn't pissing away a fortune on a doctorate, just to become a writer.  If she is, she really should drop back, punt, and put a bun in the oven.  She probably can do that without screwing it up hopelessly, at least.   

LOL. You can write a book without ten years in college
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