Author Topic: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope  (Read 1652 times)

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Offline franksolich

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primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« on: August 11, 2009, 04:58:19 AM »
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=218x4592

Oh my.

Surprisingly, the maudlin waif primitive hasn't shown up at this bonfire.

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tiddlywinks  (193 posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 06:01 PM
Original message
 
How to pass a pee test for pot other than stoping

?? I hope you will please let me know. My test may or may not happen soon.

I have been told that I just need to:

1) never give the first pee of the day
2) drink water every 15/20 min to get pee/drinking cycle synchronized
3) take a vitamin to give it a good healthy color

any other suggestions!~

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 06:05 PM
Response to Original message
 
1. that probably won't work. THC is stored in fat cells and is released very slowly.

Might consider being honest with yourself about your use.

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FarPoint (125 posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 07:28 PM
Response to Reply #1
 
8. Excellent, sincere advice.

If dope isn't addictive, why can't one just stop?

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elocs  (1000+ posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 06:10 PM
Response to Original message
 
2. Once upon a time when I working unloading semi trucks I had an unusual request.

The driver told me that he hadn't been home for a long time but the last weekend he had been home and had partied and smoked some dope with his girlfriend. Yes, he wanted me to give him a urine specimen to allow him to pass his upcoming drug test. My answer was a no-brainer: absolutely not. I didn't know him from Adam and besides, he knew the rules when he chose to drive truck. Choices/consequences.

Sorry this does not help you, but it looks as if you are caught in the middle of your own choices/consequences dilemma.

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Mojambo  (1000+ posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 06:15 PM
Response to Original message
 
4. It really depends on the test they're using

If they are using any of the more modern tests you're pretty much screwed.

Do the water drinking, vitamin thing and hope for the best. It worked for my dad once, but this was a long time ago.

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donco6  (1000+ posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 06:32 PM
Response to Original message
 
5. That's probably your best bet. But pot stays for a long, long time.

Other than stopping. . . you really have no option. The "cleansers" they sell will come back as adulterated, and you'll still be in trouble.

The skumbag primitive:

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Ian David  (1000+ posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 06:48 PM
Response to Original message
 
6. The answer is to drink the urine of a non-smoker every day until the test.

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Extend a Hand  (1000+ posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 07:14 PM
Response to Original message
 
7. It has been a long long time, but

When I first got out of college and had to take a drug test, I had been smoking everyday for eleven years. I quit smoking for 2 weeks and went down to the local methadone clinic and paid for a urine test. As expected, it came back positive for pot. I knew I couldn't wait long enough to really pass so I went to the Medical library and did some research. I found that the test is a volume test, ng/ml of urine and that a certain trace level is allowable. Since it is a volume test, the answer is to dilute the volume of your urine.

I scheduled another test a week later; this time I drank large volumes of water/ice tea until I created the diuretic effect. Most people have done this at least once by accident drinking beer . You know you've created the diuretic effect when you drink a large volume of liquid and then you have to pee and then you spend an hour or so having to go every 10-15 minutes.

Once the diuretic effect subsided, I drank another 32oz. drink and headed in for another self-paid test. That time it came back "clean as a whistle." I called the company scheduled my drug test, came back clean and was hired.

Ten years later I had to go to an all day interview and found I had to take the urine test at the end of the day. I was able to drink enough from water fountains in between interviews to create the diuretic effect and managed to pass. I was really lucky I had a different escort after each interview so it didn't seem strange that I had to go to the restroom and get a drink after *every* single interview.

If a company does random testing or hair testing you're probably screwed.

That was my experience. I'd recommend giving it a try and paying for a test on your own just for peace of mind...it's worth the money.

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 09:30 PM
Response to Reply #7
 
11. when a drug screen is done, a test for dilution is also done.

Silly people.

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 09:37 PM
Response to Reply #9
 
12. yes fat-burning exercise and fat loss releases more into blood/urine.

Gees people. If you folks are doing some work that requires a drug screen, maybe, ya think, drugs might impact your effectiveness/safety/alertness/performance? Consider that you might be endangering others besides yourselves.

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FirstLight  (1000+ posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 11:30 PM
Response to Reply #12
 
18. not all employers who test do it for "safety" reasons...you have to pee in a cup to get a job just filing at an office these days...at least in MY town... if you anna work, you gotta come up clean, no matter WHAT the stupid job. so it isn't about safety, it's political.. and unconstitutional if you want my personal opinion.

And let's not judge the smokers/tokers please.... you know, those who drink or do other drugs ON THE JOB can pee it out in 24 hours or less, thos who toke on the weekends or evenings are persecuted because it stays in the system longer...

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Mon Aug-10-09 10:28 AM
Response to Reply #18
 
23. probably the using is to kill pain, be it alcohol or drugs. Might look at that.

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tiddlywinks  (193 posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 10:18 PM
Response to Original message
 
13. pls allow me to clarify

i don't smoke marijuana when i am at work. I wish I could light em up like cheech and chong vending hot dogs on a street corner, alas.

I would never want to endanger the life of another human being much less mine or my dogs.

I feel it is a shame that this country has outlawed something that has no negative and some very positive effects, medicinally and otherwise. See the documentary interviewing Harvard Medical School director for an exceptionally eye-popping account: "The Union; The Business Behind Getting High"

The test allows for trace amounts. Excellent.

I was told to do the drink wawa til you pee plan and drink mo wawa and pee and mo wawa and pee and just keep doing that. This, I was told, doens't not allow the fat cells time to release the amount of THC into the system that results in a "positive"

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 10:54 PM
Response to Reply #13
 
15. sounds like you've got the rationalization part down pat. 

Fat cells are releasing all the time. Know your body's physiology.

Another option is to use this pee test as an opportunity to self-assess, like be honest with yourself.

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tiddlywinks  (193 posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 10:56 PM
Response to Reply #15
 
16. well i disagree and don't know where u get that!

have a good night it's past my bedtime.

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Sun Aug-09-09 11:19 PM
Response to Reply #16
 
17. think about it when you're clean and sober.

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tiddlywinks  (193 posts)      Mon Aug-10-09 02:23 AM
Response to Reply #19
 
20. i don't appreciate being made to feel like a criminal because OUR government will not suspend the prohibition on marijuana like they DID for alcohol. (This is a sensitive topic for me).

I'd be willing to bet i need to be saved by the light of jesus lord our saviour in christ too

o noooo don't get me started.

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nightrain  (811 posts)        Mon Aug-10-09 10:26 AM
Response to Reply #20
 
22. no, no religious talk from me. Just be honest with yourself about what you might be doing to yourself and what that's about.
apres moi, le deluge

Milo Yiannopoulos "It has been obvious since 2016 that Trump carries an anointing of some kind. My American friends, are you so blind to reason, and deaf to Heaven? Can he do all this, and cannot get a crown? This man is your King. Coronate him, and watch every devil shriek, and every demon howl."

Offline LC EFA

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #1 on: August 11, 2009, 05:02:05 AM »
Quote
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tiddlywinks  (193 posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 06:01 PM
Original message
 
How to pass a pee test for pot other than stoping

...

Here's a suggestion ... Take a whole shitload of coke , heroin and speed. They'll overwhelm the testing device and the weed won't show up.



Offline crockspot

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #2 on: August 11, 2009, 05:18:12 AM »
Here's a suggestion to beat the piss test: Stop smoking dope.

While it may be psychologically habit forming, it is not physically addictive. If one has the will to quit, and is not a weak whiny DUmmy, even someone who has smoked dope heavily for most of their life can just stop, not look back, and never miss it again.

Trust me, I know of what I speak.

Nuff said about that.

Offline Karin

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #3 on: August 11, 2009, 08:37:22 AM »
Oh No!  We've got more baby talk coming out of the DU!  

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I was told to do the drink wawa til you pee plan and drink mo wawa and pee and mo wawa and pee
  Don't forget to eat your yummy veggies!


That nightrain is a nagging, clucking, nanny.  It can't make its point and move along; it has to nip at the heels of the poor pothead mercilessly.  
« Last Edit: August 11, 2009, 10:28:15 AM by Karin »

Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #4 on: August 11, 2009, 09:44:05 AM »
When did they start requiring a piss test to get on SSDI or welfare?.....that's about the only "jobs" DUmmies seem to be able to hold down.
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #5 on: August 11, 2009, 11:14:06 AM »
They should test for welfare

Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #6 on: August 11, 2009, 11:34:46 AM »
It depends on what level of nanograms per milliter they are using as the criterion for 'Positve,' the current military standard is quite low and can easily return a positive result up to a month after a consistent user stops completely.  The THC metabolyte is indeed trapped in fat cells (Which most of the DUmmies have aplenty) and slowly released over time.  A person with an abnormally low percentage of body fat would likely clean up much quicker than average, but on the other hand what are the odds of a person with chronic munchies maintaining 6 or 7 percent body fat?

 :popcorn:
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Offline GOBUCKS

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #7 on: August 11, 2009, 02:02:10 PM »
Quote
Yes, he wanted me to give him a urine specimen to allow him to pass his upcoming drug test.
Now there's a man who has made a serious mistake! He asked a DUmmy to help him pass a drug screening!

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i don't appreciate being made to feel like a criminal because OUR government will not suspend the prohibition on marijuana like they DID for alcohol.
That is exactly the same arguement used by the NAMBLA queers.
DUmmy, if you use or possess marijuana, you are, by definition, a criminal.
No businessman in his right mind wants to hire a criminal, regardless of safety considerations.
A person who repeatedly commits felonies, is just sort of.... "unsavoury", don't you think?

Offline Chris_

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #8 on: August 11, 2009, 03:15:15 PM »
Quote
tiddlywinks  (193 posts)      Sun Aug-09-09 06:01 PM
Original message
 
How to pass a pee test for pot other than stoping

?? I hope you will please let me know. My test may or may not happen soon.

I have been told that I just need to:

1) never give the first pee of the day
2) drink water every 15/20 min to get pee/drinking cycle synchronized
3) take a vitamin to give it a good healthy color

any other suggestions!~

Mmmm-hmmm.  Just between you and me, the only sure way to beat any test for pot, is to take Tincture of Iodine about 2-4 hours before the test.  Makes pot absolutely undetectable in any urine test.

Good luck, dude....   :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #9 on: August 11, 2009, 05:26:48 PM »
Mmmm-hmmm.  Just between you and me, the only sure way to beat any test for pot, is to take Tincture of Iodine about 2-4 hours before the test.  Makes pot absolutely undetectable in any urine test.

Good luck, dude....   :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Man you shouldn't tell the DUmmie that....he might leave a suicide note about where he got the info......
“The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism. But, under the name of ‘liberalism’, they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation, without knowing how it happened.” - Norman Thomas, U.S. Socialist Party presidential candidate 1940, 1944 and 1948

"America is like a healthy body and its resistance is threefold: its patriotism, its morality, and its spiritual life. If we can undermine these three areas, America will collapse from within."  Stalin

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Re: primitives discuss distorting urine tests for dope
« Reply #10 on: August 11, 2009, 05:45:08 PM »
They should test for welfare

I think WV does....   :II:
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