Author Topic: Just Popped The Cork On A PUKE At Walmart (Read 5008 times)

MrsSmith · « **on:** April 23, 2009, 08:48:10 PM »

Quote

rsmith6621 (1000+ posts) Thu Apr-23-09 09:26 PM
Original message

Just Popped The Cork On A PUKE At Walmart

Had to go into Walmart my lil red cars wheel covers are shot and Walmart Automotive is the only place around my Mississippi local area that sells 13 inchers.

Anyhow at the register they keep issues of the local paper and USAToday...the person behind me was freely looking through them talking to his wife and said to her...THEM DAMN SOCIALIST DEMONS ARE LOOKING BACKWARDS which wont help us get out of the economic mess we are in today.....I said what are you talking about...he said WATERBOARDING....that is in the past and and it is the future we need to focus on....I asked have you been a conservative for long...25 years he said....I asked during the Clinton administration were you looking forward to the future or backwards to Whitewater and supporting every effort to impeach a President on charges not even related to his service in the office????

He took two deep breaths screamed and called me a socialist and someone who wants to see America ruined....other people heard this from at least 5 check stands on each side....the clerk at the register called a CODE something and security was there in less then a minute and when they asked him to cool down he got louder....the checker was instructed to take me next and security instructed me to leave the store as they detained the man...I was given a card to contact the store in the morning for a statement...

POP GOES THE WEASEL...

1 bong for imagination...

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blueclown (751 posts) Thu Apr-23-09 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
3. There is an awful lot of unstable Repukes that are not behind bars and have access to guns.
We are living in scary times.

The "educated" party...

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rurallib (1000+ posts) Thu Apr-23-09 09:30 PM
Response to Original message
6. Well the statement I would give Walmart is
If you f@&%ers hadn't driven every little business within driving distance out of business, I wouldn't have to deal with the neanderthals that represent most of your clientelle (sic).

Way to go!

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safeinOhio (669 posts) Thu Apr-23-09 09:39 PM
Response to Original message
21. My girl friend
who is a little of 60 was in the parking lot a Wallyworld and went to move an empty cart near her car. She thought she'd just go ahead and round up a couple more and put em in the rack. Well, this fat old bag starts yelling at her to come get the *$#@& cart by her car, thinking she was working there. Well Sharon says excuse me. Then the other lady starts going off on her, saying she was going to tell her boss, blah, blah, blah. Sharon told her to go ahead and tell my boss he is ass hole just like you. Then she gets in her new Caddy and drives away. Says she'll never shop there again.

A little of 60?

They're killing me tonight!!

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Dyedinthewoolliberal (1000+ posts) Thu Apr-23-09 09:39 PM
Response to Original message
22. You know what's most interesting about this?
In almsot every case, you only have to ask questions to get them going. No attacks, no charecer asassination, simply a few well worded questions as you did and {insert explosion smilie}

Oh...I am getting sore from laughing so hard...

Traveshamockery · « **Reply #1 on:** April 23, 2009, 08:54:02 PM »

Carl · « **Reply #2 on:** April 23, 2009, 09:12:41 PM »

I went grocery shopping tonight....no one screamed.
Life sure is dull for a non DUmmy.

USA4ME · « **Reply #3 on:** April 23, 2009, 09:23:12 PM »

Quote from:

rsmith6621

Just Popped The Cork On A PUKE At Walmart

Yeah. Right.

As one born in MS, and one whose family had roots there for several generations, I assure you the only "pop" you would have heard had you said that would have been a cap between your eyes.

0 bongs.

.

The Village Idiot · « **Reply #4 on:** April 23, 2009, 09:30:51 PM »

Quote from: USA4ME on April 23, 2009, 09:23:12 PM

but we conservatives know how to write fiction of course.

like at the website I started a few hours ago and needs members... libertyfic.proboards.com

Mike220 · « **Reply #5 on:** April 23, 2009, 11:35:59 PM »

Quote from: USA4ME on April 23, 2009, 09:23:12 PM

0 bongs.

Nah, it's gotta be negative something. I'd give it -3 bongs.

LC EFA · « **Reply #6 on:** April 24, 2009, 12:29:30 AM »

Yanno - this bouncy would seem a lot more realistic if the roles were reversed...

DUmmie in Walmart arrested after their head explodes. After all it's usualy those idiots who are unable to mind their
own damn business while waiting in line and then inflicting their political fervor on their fellow shoppers.

The Village Idiot · « **Reply #7 on:** April 24, 2009, 01:14:36 AM »

DUmmie went down to Wal-Mart
He was looking for a soul to steal
He carried a rose and wore nothing
but tanning cream from toe to heel

He came across a young boy playing a laptop
and FReepin it hard
The DUmmie said "I got a coin of gold
against your soul that says I'm better N you"

The boy said "My names Johnny and I'll take your bet
your gonna regret
cuz I'm the best there's ever been"

CHORUS:
Johnny Johnny warm up your Dell and crack your knuckles
cuz the DUmmie ain't here to play
If you win you'll get a shiny coin made of gold,
but if you lose the DUmmie gets your soul!!

The DUmmie fired up his Mac,
sparks flying from his fingertips
and when he began the keys started tappin
klickety klickety klickety klack

In just a few seconds he finished a screed
blaming the right for bubonic plague
and was onto praising Harry Reid
before saying Bush needs trial at the Hague

and when the DUmmie was through
the Wal-Mart was as silent as a shroom
he smiled evily and raised a hand to Johnny

CHORUS:
Johnny Johnny warm up your Dell and crack your knuckles
cuz the DUmmie ain't here to play
If you win you'll get a shiny coin made of gold,
but if you lose the DUmmie gets your soul!!

Johnny just laughed at him and asked
If thats all you got go hit the sack
I am pretty sure my Dog can do that
You don't have facts and your a hack

Johnny used his WiFi and called up his site
it was Free Republic and it was legion
Johnny hit the keyboard, using all his might
calling up the forces of truth and reason

He Freeped a post, and bumped a blog
he was most definitely logged in
the spork weasel was his friend as he
bashed the media and then did it again

When he was finished the DUmmie knew that he'd been beat
he threw the gold coin to the ground at Johnny's feet
Johnny put it in his pocket and told him
"any time you feel lucky punk, you just come right on down.
and I will show the world that your a clown"

The Dummie he just went back home and posted a lie see
and all night long it went bouncey bouncey bouncey

RobJohnson · « **Reply #8 on:** April 24, 2009, 01:48:44 AM »

Quote from: Carl on April 23, 2009, 09:12:41 PM

I went grocery shopping tonight....no one screamed.
Life sure is dull for a non DUmmy.

Did the cops jump out of aisle 3 as you looked at organic rice?

The Village Idiot · « **Reply #9 on:** April 24, 2009, 02:10:16 AM »

Quote from: RobJohnson on April 24, 2009, 01:48:44 AM

Did the cops jump out of aisle 3 as you looked at organic rice?

They jump out from a Bush's Baked Beans display

feel free to join my conservative fiction forum... its only about 8 hours old

http://libertyfic.proboards.com

delilahmused · « **Reply #10 on:** April 24, 2009, 04:27:53 AM »

Quote

Anyhow at the register they keep issues of the local paper and USAToday...the person behind me was freely looking through them talking to his wife and said to her...THEM DAMN SOCIALIST DEMONS ARE LOOKING BACKWARDS which wont help us get out of the economic mess we are in today.....I said what are you talking about...he said WATERBOARDING....that is in the past and and it is the future we need to focus on....I asked have you been a conservative for long...25 years he said....I asked during the Clinton administration were you looking forward to the future or backwards to Whitewater and supporting every effort to impeach a President on charges not even related to his service in the office????

I don't think it was a POP this idiot heard, instead it was the sounds of a conservative laughing hysterically at this jerk (who should've BEEN MINDING HIS OWN ****ING BUSINESS) and his absolutely asinine attempt to make a logical point. The Clinton reference doesn't work because CLINTON WAS STILL PRESIDENT WHILE THE INVESTIGATIONS WERE TAKING PLACE. It didn't require looking backwards. Had the investigation/impeachment started AFTER Clinton left office and had George Bush encouraged it, this really, really stupid DUmmie might have a point.

When Bush said he wanted a new tone, he actually tried to make it happen, reaching out in similar ways as he did in Texas. Of course, the people of Texas are more reasonable than those in DC but he couldn't know that until he let Ted "I never thought she couldn't swim" Kennedy write the education Bill and got shit on for his efforts. When Obama says he wants a new tone, he's just reading pretty words off a teleprompter. Aside from not having an original thought, he really doesn't care whether anyone gets along.

Personally, I hope they DO have these hearings and investigations. This is exactly how they will over reach. Americans are concerned about their finances. Nothing the dems have done so far have done anything but bail out the rich Wall Street fat cats. For decades they've been trying to convince us they have it in for the corporate class. People voted for Obama because his teleprompter promised he would fix the economy (at that point the teleprompter was a fiscal conservative...as are the majority of Americans). Bush kept us safe. Most Americans, regardless of Bush's popularity at the end of his term, understood he took terrorism seriously. Whatever his perceived "sins" what he did was out of a genuine love for this country and its people. Persecuting him and his people would scream "getting revenge is more important that helping you little people out there in flyover country, well and those of you in the city, too!"

And, If they're busy looking for scapegoats, congress will have less time to spend our money. The thought of marching Republicans up to appear before one of their egotistical, arrogant committees is so delicious they won't have a clue how negatively it will affect them. It will make them incredibly unpopular and will most likely go nowhere.

Cindie

Chris_ · « **Reply #11 on:** April 24, 2009, 06:07:15 AM »

That was a fairly entertaining fabrication.

The probable other side to the story...

I made my weekly trip to Walmart today. You know, I really like that place. They have almost anything you want right there under one roof, and the prices are usually pretty good. Plus, it's just nice to shop at a place that hasn't been taken over by the unions. It's kind of funny. The libs scream how Walmart has to become unionized because they treat their employees so badly, but thus far every employee to whom I've spoken really likes working at Walmart. Go figure.

Anyhow at the register they keep issues of the local paper and USAToday. I was glancing through them to see what BS they were spinning in attempt to build up the socialist messiah, the Big Zero. I told my wife that it appeared they were trying to attack the Bush administration's interrogation methods in order to remove attention away from Zero's socialist destruction of the economy. About this time a smelly, very dirty individual who was standing behind us holding several bags of Cheetos and an EBT card asked what I was talking about. I explained that discussing whether or not President Bush hurt the feelings of some murderous, terrorist prisoners would not help the economy because it was in the past. I explained that we needed to focus on the future, and not a socialistic future where we try to spend our way out of debt.

My answer seemed to set something off in this smelly, very dirty individual. Its eyes grew wide and even crazier looking. Spit dribbled down its cheek as it began to hyperventilate. Suddenly it began screaming "CHIMPY MCCOKESPOON!!!!MIHOP!!!!LIHOP!!!!BFEE!!!!"

I could see that this smelly, very dirty individual had some serious mental problems so I tried to calm it down. In a few second its hyperventilating eased a bit and it asked if I supported Clinton getting impeached for a blow job. I smiled and explained to the individual that Clinton didn't get impeached for a blow job but for the crime of perjury.

This set off the smelly, very dirty individual again. The hyperventilating returned, and it begain screaming, "FUNDIE REPUG!!!!TOAST!!!!CHIMPY MCCOKESPOON!!!!"

The individual was screaming so loudly that it could be heard throughout the store. The clerk politely asked it to calm down. With this the individual began screaming at the clerk, "I'LL DU YOU!!!!"

Security quickly arrived and led the smelly, very dirty individual away. As the checker began ringing up my items she smiled and apologized. She says they get those folks in every now and again. She said that she heard that they even have a website where they gather together and boast about how smart they are. We both had a good laugh at that.

LC EFA · « **Reply #12 on:** April 24, 2009, 06:17:10 AM »

Quote from: ChuckJ on April 24, 2009, 06:07:15 AM

That was a fairly entertaining fabrication.

The probable other side to the story...

....

That was a thing of beauty.

Flame · « **Reply #13 on:** April 24, 2009, 07:07:20 AM »

Quote from: ChuckJ on April 24, 2009, 06:07:15 AM

That was a fairly entertaining fabrication.

The probable other side to the story...

I made my weekly trip to Walmart today. You know, I really like that place. They have almost anything you want right there under one roof, and the prices are usually pretty good. Plus, it's just nice to shop at a place that hasn't been taken over by the unions. It's kind of funny. The libs scream how Walmart has to become unionized because they treat their employees so badly, but thus far every employee to whom I've spoken really likes working at Walmart. Go figure.

Anyhow at the register they keep issues of the local paper and USAToday. I was glancing through them to see what BS they were spinning in attempt to build up the socialist messiah, the Big Zero. I told my wife that it appeared they were trying to attack the Bush administration's interrogation methods in order to remove attention away from Zero's socialist destruction of the economy. About this time a smelly, very dirty individual who was standing behind us holding several bags of Cheetos and an EBT card asked what I was talking about. I explained that discussing whether or not President Bush hurt the feelings of some murderous, terrorist prisoners would not help the economy because it was in the past. I explained that we needed to focus on the future, and not a socialistic future where we try to spend our way out of debt.

My answer seemed to set something off in this smelly, very dirty individual. Its eyes grew wide and even crazier looking. Spit dribbled down its cheek as it began to hyperventilate. Suddenly it began screaming "CHIMPY MCCOKESPOON!!!!MIHOP!!!!LIHOP!!!!BFEE!!!!"

I could see that this smelly, very dirty individual had some serious mental problems so I tried to calm it down. In a few second its hyperventilating eased a bit and it asked if I supported Clinton getting impeached for a blow job. I smiled and explained to the individual that Clinton didn't get impeached for a blow job but for the crime of perjury.

This set off the smelly, very dirty individual again. The hyperventilating returned, and it begain screaming, "FUNDIE REPUG!!!!TOAST!!!!CHIMPY MCCOKESPOON!!!!"

The individual was screaming so loudly that it could be heard throughout the store. The clerk politely asked it to calm down. With this the individual began screaming at the clerk, "I'LL DU YOU!!!!"

Security quickly arrived and led the smelly, very dirty individual away. As the checker began ringing up my items she smiled and apologized. She says they get those folks in every now and again. She said that she heard that they even have a website where they gather together and boast about how smart they are. We both had a good laugh at that.